He picked up the photo and offered it to his father. “Nicole is carrying my child. Your grandchild. The one you’ve been harping about for years.”
His father stared at the picture in silence and then his gaze met Ryan’s. “So you lied. You were dating her before you suggested the plane.”
“No.”
“Then what? You had a one-night stand? Didn’t I warn you to be careful?”
“I hired a surrogate. The plan backfired.”
His father went silent once more then finally said, “Explain.”
“I want to be president of Patrick Architectural when you retire. I’m damned good at my job, and I have the awards to prove it. I know this company. I know this business. I shouldn’t have to be married, drive a sedan, have a house in the suburbs filled with children or live your dream to win your approval.
“Despite the decade of sweat equity I’ve put in at P.A. you keep demanding more proof that I consider this firm my future. But whatever I do, it’s never enough. How can I prove I’ve never wanted to work anywhere else? I thought a kid, another generation of Patricks to carry on, would demonstrate my…loyalty to the firm.”
Hearing his plot out loud made Ryan realize he’d been an idiot. How had he ever considered this a logical plan? “Wrong move. I know that now.”
His father stood the frame up on the desk. “Where does Nicole come into this? I don’t see her as the type to hire out her body.”
“You’re right. She’s the kind of woman who always puts family first and herself last. The antithesis of my mother and my ex-wife.”
His father grimaced. “Your mother demanded a lot of attention. But sometimes no matter how much you give someone it’s never enough because the void they’re trying to fill is internal. The more your mother tried to use you, the more I backed off because you kept getting hurt. I’m sorry you were caught in the middle of our breakup.
“As for your ex, you did the honorable thing in marrying her. Too bad she had no honor or honesty in her. But that’s in the past and it can’t be changed. Tell me about the present. What’s Nicole’s role?”
“Nicole volunteered to carry a child for her infertile sister even though relinquishing the baby would rip her heart out. But the fertility clinic made a mistake and inseminated Nicole with my sperm instead of her brother-in-law’s. I’m suing for full custody.”
“And the sister’s claim?”
“She’s pregnant with triplets and no longer needs this child.”
His father clamped a hand on his shoulder. “You know I’m old-fashioned, and I won’t deny I’ve made my desire for grandchildren clear, but I pressured you into marrying for the sake of a baby once already. I won’t repeat that mistake. But is marriage out of the question? I’ve seen you two together, son. You and Nicole have something…something that might be worth fighting for.”
“I’ll never marry again. You know why.”
“But is denying the woman her child the right thing to do?”
Before he’d met Nicole, Ryan could have answered in the affirmative without reservations. Now he wasn’t so sure. He’d had more candidates for the surrogate position than he’d had time to interview. Women competing for the right to sell their bodies and their babies. But Nicole wasn’t like them. “She signed away her rights.”
“Circumstances have changed. She’s not giving her sister a gift of love anymore.”
“This is my child.”
“And hers.” His father pointed out the obvious. “Is there a reason why you think Nicole would be an unfit mother?”
Guilt stabbed him. “None whatsoever.”
“However oddly your relationship began, you’ve created a child together. If you can’t love her, then let her go and work out a solution for the child that allows it to benefit from both parents. But be aware that in the future some other man may be stepfathering your child.”
The words hit Ryan like a fist to the gut, punching the air from his lungs. He hadn’t thought about Nicole with another man. A woman like her had too much to offer to be alone for long. But the idea of her in someone else’s bed, someone else’s arms made him want to crawl out of his skin.
He wasn’t feeling territorial, was he? He’d never been possessive of a woman before—not even his ex. But the idea of Nicole crying out as some other man drove into her slender body, of her shuddering as the faceless ass brought her to orgasm, ripped a hole in Ryan’s stomach and spilled burning acid through his body.
“I can’t risk another marriage.”
“Another betrayal, you mean. I understand. We all want to avoid that kind of pain. And some of us never find the courage to try again.”
The solemn statement staggered Ryan. Until now his father had never admitted that the divorce had hurt him. He’d hidden his feeling behind a gruff, no-nonsense facade.
“But, Ryan, think long and hard before you deprive a baby of its mother. No one will love the child more. That’s why I let you go. It wasn’t that I didn’t love you or want you around. It’s that you were your mother’s life, her reason for being. I’m not sure what would have happened to her if I’d taken you away.”
Surprised, he searched his father’s face to see if he were telling the truth, and found pain and regret in his father’s eyes. “I wish you’d told me that sooner, Dad.”
“I didn’t want to diminish your love for your mother by pointing out her weaknesses. We all have flaws. It’s how we deal with them that counts. And I loved your mother despite hers.”
“But you divorced her.”
“She divorced me. Your mother was the love of my life. After you came along I wanted to give you both more. A bigger house. Private school. Nicer cars. A Cornell education like your grandfather and I had. I worked extra hours, probably more than I should have. Your mother became convinced I was cheating on her. I wasn’t, but she wouldn’t believe me, and once the trust is gone…” Sadness deepened the lines on his face.
And Ryan had just destroyed Nicole’s trust.
His father shrugged. “Still, I got you out of the deal, so even though the marriage ended badly, the pain was worth it.”
“Dad, I don’t want my kid to be caught in a tug-of-war.”
“Then you’d better work out a fair solution you and Nicole can live with. Better that than a vicious legal battle that drags on for a decade. But remember, the child’s welfare always comes first. Always. Even if it might be the most difficult decision you’ll ever make. Walking away from you was that for me.”
Ryan looked at his father with a new perspective, one that allowed him a clearer view of the decisions his father had made over the years.
And now Ryan was in the same no-win situation. Did he look out for number one the way he always had? Or did he put his child first? And could he ever regain Nicole’s trust? Right now that job seemed to be the most urgent.
He stared into blue eyes so similar to the ones he saw in the mirror each morning, but these eyes were older, wiser and more generous. “Dad, this is one time I wish you could tell me what to do.”
His father patted his shoulder. “And this is the one time no one but you has the answer. Whatever you decide, son, I’ll back you one hundred percent. But do the right thing by my grandchild.”
His father had said it perfectly. No one would love this child more than Nicole. No one had a more generous heart. But granting her joint custody meant leaving the door open for another chunk of his heart to be imploded if she decided later to cut him out of her and their baby’s life.
Was the risk worth it?
Twelve
Nicole stood in the boardroom early Tuesday morning staring at her siblings and her parents and listening to the hum of their conversations as she gathered her courage for what she had to do. Only Patrick and Lauren, neither of whom owned any HAMC stock, were missing.
It would be much easier to do as her mother had done and simply disappear. But life on the run really wasn’t fair to a child. Besides, her baby deserved to know its aunts, uncles and grandparents even if the Hightowers weren’t the warmest, fuzziest bunch. And Ryan had been robbed of a child once already. Nicole couldn’t do that to him again. That meant taking the easy way out wasn’t an option.“I’m pregnant.”
Her words silenced the chatter. All eyes turned to her.
Beth crossed her arms and stuck her jaw out at a belligerent angle. “Great. Make this all about you again.”
Nicole realized Patrick was right. She hadn’t known her sister. Otherwise, she would have recognized Beth’s petty jealousy long ago.
“Who’s the father?” Trent asked in a deadly calm voice.
“Ryan Patrick. That’s why I asked to be excused as his CAM.” Fist clenched, Trent rose looking ready to do battle. “Sit down, big brother. This situation is far more complicated than you think.” He resettled uneasily in his chair.
“Let me begin at the beginning. Beth and Patrick asked me to be a surrogate for them and I agreed. I was supposed to have Patrick’s child, but the fertility clinic transposed the first and last names of the donors, and I’m carrying Ryan’s baby instead.”
Bodies shifted around the table as they digested the information. “In the meantime, congratulations are in order. Beth has been seeing a new fertility specialist, and she and Patrick have just discovered they’re expecting triplets. They’ll need your support in the coming months. Being pregnant with triplets won’t be easy. Neither will caring for them after the delivery.”
She rested a hand over the slight swell marking her baby and gave her family time to offer Beth their good wishes while she tried to remember her practiced speech without luck.
The conversation died down and everyone’s attention returned to her. “In light of Beth’s pregnancy, I’ve decided to keep my baby, but Beth and Patrick and Ryan are also fighting for custody. The battle is likely to get ugly, and the scandal might make headlines. I don’t want to turn Hightower Aviation into a battlefield where we destroy our family by choosing sides. If you’d like me to resign, I will, or I can transfer to one of our foreign operation centers.”
Her mother stood and every muscle in Nicole’s body tightened. Surely her mother wouldn’t denounce her if she’d meant what she’d said about regretting not being there for her children in the past.
Her mother met her gaze. “Scandals come and go. Hightowers survive them. Nicole, you have my full support. And I would hope Beth and Patrick will be mature enough to stop their nonsense and give theirs, as well. Your generosity is overwhelming, and I am proud to call you my daughter.”
Relief weakened Nicole and tears clogged her throat. She grasped the table’s edge to stay upright. This wasn’t the mother she’d known for the past twenty-eight years. “Thank you, Mom.”
Beth looked none-too-happy with their mother’s pronouncement. “Even if Patrick and I drop the custody battle, Ryan has a damned good chance of winning. He has a DNA link to the baby. And Nicole waived her parental rights.”