All my protests fade at the sight of that elegant, polite elbow. I slide my hand in and move a bit closer to him, letting him lead me inside.
Once we pass through the glass doors into the mall, I gasp. This place is a wonderland.
"Is that a roller coaster?" I squeak. The mall is at least four stories tall and it is so big that the sounds echo. Even if I squint, I can’t see to the far end of the building. It’s like it goes on forever. Big, potted plants line the median of the enormous walkway, and there are colorful banners hanging high overhead that broadcast sales and specialty stores. There are lit signs and elegant window displays and people everywhere.
It’s overwhelming and incredible all at once. "Oh, wow." I look over at Nick to see if he’s impressed, too, but he’s watching me. Color hits my cheeks, and I glance away, looking around again. I don’t even know where to start, and all the stores look so expensive. “Do you know which store is cheapest?"
He’s silent, and when I look over, he’s frowning at me. "Why cheapest, Daisy?"
I blush at the way he says my name, like his tongue has to caress the syllables before they leave his mouth. “Well, we are only spending seventy dollars. I want to get as much as I can for my money."
And then I flush even brighter, because it’s not my money, it’s his. And all he owes me are some panties and a pair of pants. It feels wrong to try and fleece him out of extra clothing simply because I need it.
"Daisy," he says quietly. "Do not worry about money. Buy clothes you need. I will pay, da? Do not look at prices."
This makes me frown. I don’t want to argue with Nick. I want to kiss him. But I’m not bold enough for that, so I figure that I will simply pick out inexpensive clothes and that this will complete our shopping trip. "All right."
I see a large store that advertises shirts for five dollars and head in that direction, but Nick takes my hand and tugs me down the wide-tiled hallways. I’m sure I’m going to have a sore neck from whipping my head back and forth as I stare in amazement at all the stores. There is a store for everything from magnets to hats. Finally, Nick stops at a store with big, gold letters at the top and black marble trim. Inside, there are several tall, severe people dressed all in black who seem too beautiful to be Minnesotans. No one who lives on a farm looks like these folks. The windows are full of posing mannequins in silks and leathers and skimpy bras and underwear. I suck in a breath as Nick heads in, his hand clasped over mine to keep me at his side.
I don’t know where to start looking. Then, I spy a sale sign at the back of the store and untangle my hands from Nick, heading there.
The items on sale are all way too large or out of season. Or ugly. I pick through them anyhow, flipping tags on anything that might seem like it could fit with a little bit of hand-sewing.
Nick waits patiently nearby, and when I glance over, he’s scanning the room, eyes ever-watchful. I wonder for a moment what he’s looking for.
I can’t find anything I like. The items are so expensive, even on clearance. Fifty dollars for a bra? It’s insane. But I know Nick won’t let me leave here without at least buying something. So I grab one plain bra that is twenty dollars and clutch it under my arm to hide it. For some reason, it feels weird for Nick to see my undergarments. "Let’s just get this one."
He looks at me for a long moment, glancing at the bra I’m trying to hide with my crossed arms. He reaches toward me and grasps the tag. Examines it. Then he looks at me.
"Do you pick out the lowest price item, Daisy?"
His English needs work, but I know what he means. I shrug, feeling silly.
Nick holds his hand out for it. Oh. My face flushes bright red, and I hand it to him, trying not to be too embarrassed—or titillated—at the thought of Nick’s hands touching my bra.
He heads to the counter, and I linger a few steps behind. His voice is low and smooth as he speaks to one of the black-clad sales clerks, and he hands her the bra. A moment later, she comes from behind the counter, a measuring tape in her hands.
"Sweetie," she says as she approaches me. "I was talking to your boyfriend, and he is concerned that the bra you picked out won’t fit. Let’s get you measured, okay?"
I cast a startled look at Nick, but he watches me with a cool gaze, as if daring me to protest. The woman puts a hand to the small of my back and leads me to the dressing rooms, and she measures my br**sts while my cheeks flame red with embarrassment. She gives me a size—34C—and we leave the dressing room.
"You were right," the saleswoman sings out to Nick. "That one is much too big. We’ll find her something more suitable."
He merely nods, ignoring my protesting glances as the woman heads to one particular part of the store.
"Now," she says. "These are similar to what you had, but I think we can find something in your size." She pulls out a plain, smooth bra in a nude color. It is boring. It is like what I picked out, but I flip over the tag. It is no cheaper than the fancier items.
And for some reason, I put my foot down. I have worn boring, plain clothing all my life. My father insisted on approving everything I wore, and as a result, I have never had anything pretty or bold in my life. So I think for a moment and shake my head at the nude bra the woman holds out to me. I head instead to a nearby rack and look at the bras there.
They are lacy, frilly things. One is a silky pink and white gingham with a lacy design along the cups. It’s incredibly beautiful, and I touch it longingly.
And then I look to Nick, as if seeking approval.
He nods, and I could swear he looks pleased.
"I think I want this one."
"That’s a great choice," the saleswoman enthuses. "But you’ll need the matching panties."
"Da," Nick says from afar before I can comment. "She needs several sets. Bras and panties. Shirts. Shoes. Dresses."
I shoot him a glance, but he has his phone out and is scrolling through something. He’s not watching.
"Don’t worry about him, honey." The saleswoman pats my arm. "He told me you are to get everything you want."
Everything? I want all the pretty things in the store. I finger a pair of lacy, pink garter belts that match the bra and panties I’ve selected. "I’m not sure it’s appropriate for him to be buying me this stuff."
"Are you kidding?" the saleswoman asks with a laugh. "Guys come in here and do this for their girlfriends all the time."
I’m not Nick’s girlfriend, and I’m still not entirely sure it’s right, but I’m weakening at the sight of all the pretty things around me. As if sensing my hesitation, the woman puts the garter belts in the pile.
And I don’t tell her no.
I move to the next rack. It has a yellow, floral pattern. It’s sweet and pretty, and it makes me happy to see it. When I pause over it, the woman adds the bra and matching panties to my stack. I wonder if Nick told her to be aggressive.
By the time I say “enough," her arms are full of colorful, beautiful undergarments in a rainbow of colors and soft, pleasing fabrics. There is nothing plain or ordinary—or even serviceable-looking—in the stack. They are all soft, sultry things.
And even though I shouldn’t let a man buy them for me, I’m giddy at the thought of owning them.
The saleswoman is having fun dressing me. She takes me to some of the racks at the front of the store after we’ve picked out piles of lingerie, and she adds sweaters and skirts and a few blouses to my overflowing arms. When I protest, she looks over at Nick, who nods approval, and she then takes me to the jeans counter, where we go through the same routine. Protest, look to Nick, pile onto my arms.
When we head to the counter, I hesitate. "It’s too much."
"Nyet, it is not," Nick says. "You deserve beautiful things." And his hand touches my back and rubs my shoulder blades.
I like that touch. I want more, but I don’t ask for more. I glance around as the saleswoman rings us up. There is a couple nearby, and they’re holding hands as the woman browses through a rack. I look at their clasped hands with a bit of envy. Would Nick hold my hand like that if I asked him to?
The total the woman calls out startles me. It is more money than I brought with me during my escape. "No," I protest, but Nick simply pulls out his wallet, and I watch as those tattooed fingers unfold several hundred-dollar bills. I spy more of them tucked into the billfold.
I’m shocked. He’s not poor.
I don’t know why I feel so momentarily betrayed by this information, but I am. I feel like Nick has lied to me. Our building is old, run down. Why is he living there if he casually carries around so much money? I want to ask him, but it seems rude.
Instead of feeling scandalous that I let this exciting, strange man buy me panties, I feel…like a charity case. It’s no longer fun and a daring whim. Now I’m just sad.
Does he do this for everyone? Find women in need and purchase them things? He might. He has a hard exterior, but I sense a kind, lonely heart underneath. I thought he and I had our poverty in common.
Seeing all that money makes me realize he is nothing like me, and I feel smaller.
The woman stuffs the receipt in the bag, and I take the handles before Nick can. I’ll keep that receipt and return all the pretty things, and then I’ll give the money back to Nick. Based on Nick’s behavior in the store, it’s either throw a big argument now or simply allow him to think that he’s getting his way and come back another time. I’ve decided.
It’s silly because now that I know he’s not poor like me, I feel alone all over again.
I bend my head as we leave the store, staring at the shiny marble flooring of the mall. Nick’s hand is on my shoulders, guiding me. A friendly hand.
Nothing more.
I’m so stupid. Here I am, caught up in fantasies and daydreams, thinking this man might like me when he is simply a rich man who is being polite.
We walk a few steps outside of the store, and Nick halts. I barely notice until his hands are on my shoulders, and he’s suddenly standing in front of me.
"Daisy," he murmurs, and his fingers touch my chin to make me look up at him. Those intense eyes are devouring me. "What is wrong?"
For some reason, my lip trembles. "I…you shouldn’t have bought me these things."
His eyes narrow. "Why?" His accent is so thick it sounds more like "vyyy."
"That woman…she thought you were my boyfriend."
He stills and when he speaks, his voice is hard. "You have a boyfriend already? He will be jealous?"
"What? No." I shake my head. "No boyfriend. I just—she doesn’t realize you were just being kind."
A harsh laugh escapes him. "Daisy, there are many things you can call me, but ‘kind’ is not one of them."
It is an odd thing to say. He has been nothing but kind to me.
"It’s too much money."
He considers this for a moment, and then he puts his hand out for the bag. I hand it to him, feeling crushing disappointment. Why am I so hung up on lovely, silky panties? Perhaps it’s not the items themselves, but what they represent.