She looked to the table again, where Bann and Helda watched with quiet eyes. "You're not eating enough, Lady Queen," said Helda. "You've lost your appetite, and if I may say so, Lord Giddon has too."
"What?" she cried. "Giddon, why didn't you tell me?"
"He's also been asking me for headache remedies," Bann said.
"Stop it, you two," said Giddon in annoyance. "Lady Queen, you've been walking around with this horrible, trapped look in your eyes. The small est things make you flinch."
"I understand now," she said. "I understand all of them now.
And I've been pushing them. I've been forcing them to remember."
"It's not your fault," Giddon said. "A queen needs people around her who aren't afraid of her necessary questions."
"I don't know what to do," she said, her voice cracking. "I don't know what to do."
"You need to build some criteria," said Bann, "to give to Death.
The facts you need to know now, in order to address the immediate needs of your kingdom, and only those facts."
"Wil you all help me?"
"Of course we will ," said Bann.
"I've already worked out what the criteria should be," said Helda with a firm nod, while Giddon col apsed onto the sofa in relief.
It was a process that involved a fair deal of argument, argument that was a comfort to Bitterblue, because it was logical, and it made the world solid around her again.
Afterwards, they went to the library to look for Death. The endless, slow, silent winter snowfal continued. In the great courtyard, Bitterblue turned her face to the glass ceilings.
The snow drifted down. Grief began to touch her. The edges of grief; a grief too large for her to accept all at once just now.
She would pretend she was up there in the sky, above the snow clouds, looking down on Monsea, like the moon or the stars. She would pretend she was watching the snowfal cover Monsea, like bandages from Madlen's gentle hands, so that underneath that warm, soft covering, Monsea could begin to heal.
Chapter 36
THE NEXT MORNING, Thiel stood at his stand, straight and efficient, flipping through papers.
"I won't ask you any more questions about Leck's time,"
Bitterblue said to him.
Thiel turned, peering at her in confusion. "You—you won't, Lady Queen?"
"I'm sorry for every time I've forced you to remember a thing you wish to forget," she said. "As far as I'm able, I'll try never to do that again."
"Thank you, Lady Queen," he said, still confused. "Why? Has something happened?"
"I'll ask other people instead," she said. "I'm going to be seeking out some new people, Thiel, to help me with matters that are too painful for those of you who worked with Leck to address. And maybe some city people to inform me about city matters specifical y, and help me solve some of these mysteries."
Thiel stared back at her, clutching his pen in both hands. He looked so lonely somehow, and so unhappy. "Thiel!" she hastened to add. "You'l still be my number one man, of course. But I find myself wanting a greater range of advice and ideas, you understand?"
"Of course I understand, Lady Queen."
"I'm going to meet with a few of them now," she said, rising from her chair, "in the library. I've asked them to come. Oh, please, Thiel," she added, wanting to touch him. "Don't look like that. I can't do without you, I promise, and you're breaking my heart."
IN HER LIBRARY alcove, Tilda and Teddy stood together, brother and sister, gazing at the endless rows of books. Their faces glowed with appreciation.
"Did Bren stay at the shop?" asked Bitterblue.
"We thought it unwise to leave it unguarded, Lady Queen,"
said Tilda.
"And my Lienid Guard?"
"One stayed to guard Bren, Lady Queen, and the other accompanied us."
"It makes me nervous for them to split up," Bitterblue said.
"I'm going to see if we can spare another man or two for you. What news can you give me?"
"Bad news, Lady Queen," said Teddy grimly. "Early this morning, a story room burned. It was empty, so no one was hurt, but no one saw how it started either."
"I suppose we're meant to think it was random," said Bitterblue in frustration. "A coincidence. And natural y, it wasn't in my morning report. And I really don't know what to do," she added, a bit hopelessly, "beyond send the Monsean Guard to patrol the streets more, except that ever since Captain Smit disappeared, I've been leery of trusting the Monsean Guard. Smit's been gone a month and a half, you know. I keep getting reports on his proceedings at the refineries that I cannot get myself to believe. Darby says they're in Smit's handwriting, but Darby hasn't been inspiring confidence of late. Oh," she said, rubbing her forehead. "Perhaps I'm just crazy."
"We could find out whether Captain Smit's truly at the refineries, Lady Queen," said Tilda, elbowing her brother, "couldn't we, Teddy? Through our own contacts?"
Teddy's face lit up. "We could," he said. "It may take a few weeks, but We'll do it, Lady Queen."
"Thank you," Bitterblue said. "On another matter, can any of you make letter molds?"
"Bren quite enjoys it, Lady Queen," said Tilda.
Bitterblue handed Tilda a piece of paper on which she'd drawn the thirty-two letters of the Del ian alphabet. "Please ask her to make molds of these shapes," said Bitterblue.
For Death's translation of the first volume was moving at a crawl and all this talk of fire was making Bitterblue distinctly anxious; what if they lost the other thirty-four volumes somehow, before Death got to them? "Leck's journals need printing," she said. "Tel no one."
THE NEXT MORNING, Bitterblue emerged from her rooms, rubbing sleep from her eyes.
In the sitting room, Helda arranged the breakfast dishes.
"Hava was just here, Lady Queen," she said, banging plates around. "She's succeeded where the other tail hasn't. She's followed Fox to her nighttime lair."
"Lair." Bitterblue went to kneel before the fire, adjusting her sword, breathing in the light. It was hard to wake up when the snow never stopped and the sun never reached her windows. "That's not a friendly word. You know, Helda, I've been thinking some things through. Is Fox's lair, by any chance, a cave?"
"It is, Lady Queen," said Helda humorlessly. "Fox lives in a cave across the river."
"And Spook and Gray also live in a cave?"
"Yes. An interesting coincidence, isn't it? Fox's cave is on the other side of Winter Bridge. She gets onto the bridge, if you can believe it, by climbing up its pil ars from where they start under the docks."
"Bal s," said Bitterblue. "Why not just walk onto it the normal way? Why not row across the river in a boat?"
"We can only assume that she's alert to the possibility of being followed, Lady Queen. It's difficult to spot a person in dark clothing climbing the pil ars of a bridge at night, even a bridge made of mirrors. Once Hava understood what Fox was doing, of course, she backtracked and ran onto the bridge in the usual way, but Fox was too fast for her, and got too far ahead. Fox crossed the bridge, shimmied down the pil ars again, and, as best as Hava could tell from above, disappeared into a grove of trees."
"How does Hava know about the lair, then?"
"Because she followed the next person who came across the bridge, Lady Queen."
Something in Helda's tone gave Bitterblue a sinking feeling. "And that person was?"
"Sapphire, Lady Queen. He led Hava directly into the trees, then to an outcropping of rock that was guarded by men with swords. Hava can't be sure, of course, but she believes it's a cave and that it was Fox's destination as wel ."
"Tel me he didn't go in," said Bitterblue. "Tel me he hasn't been working with them all this time."
"No, Lady Queen," said Helda. "Lady Queen! Take a breath," said Helda, coming to Bitterblue, kneeling, grasping Bitterblue's hands hard. "Sapphire did not go in, nor did he make his presence known to the guards. He hid, and poked around. He seemed to be investigating the place."
For a moment, Bitterblue rested her head on Helda's shoulder, breathing through the relief. "Bring him somewhere discreet, please, Helda," she said, "so that I can talk to him."
A CIPHERED NOTE from Helda at noon told Bitterblue that Saf was waiting in her rooms.
"How is this discreet?" Bitterblue asked, blowing into the sitting room. Helda sat at the table, calmly eating her lunch.
Saf stood before the sofa in coat and hat, gloves and halter belt, stamping his feet and radiating cold. "How many people saw him?"
"He came through that window, Lady Queen," said Helda.
"The window faces the garden and the river, both of which are empty at the moment."
Seeing the ropes then, she went to the window in question to examine the platform. She hadn't realized how narrow the platform was. It swayed and clanked against the castle wall .
Gripping her hands into fists, she said, "Where is Fox?"
"Fox disappears for lunch, Lady Queen," said Saf.
"How do you know she doesn't disappear somewhere where she can see my windows?"
"I don't," Saf said, shrugging. "I'll factor it into whatever happens next."
"And what do you expect to happen next?"
"I was hoping you'd ask me to push her off the platform, Lady Queen," he said.
It was a relief that he was being insolent, even while using her title; it gave her a familiar patch of ground to stand on.
"Fox is Gray," she said, "isn't she? My gray-eyed G raceling servant and spy is Spook's grand daughter Gray."
"It would seem so, Lady Queen," said Saf plainly. "And what your creepy girl who turns into things probably doesn't know, despite her wondrous abilities, is that last night, I found a place where, if I put my ear to the ground, I could overhear Fox and Spook talking. The crown is in that cave. I'm sure of it. Along with a lot of other royal loot, from the sound of it."
"How did you know Hava was following you?"
Saf snorted. "There was an enormous gargoyle on Winter Bridge," he said. "Winter Bridge is the mirrored bridge that disappears into the sky, and it doesn't have stone gargoyles. And I knew you'd been having Fox tailed. That's how I tailed Fox myself. By tailing your tails. Fox kept disappearing under the docks. Your spies would give up, but I was more persistent. I took a lucky guess a few nights ago and caught sight of her on the bridge."
"Have you been seen, Saf? It doesn't sound like you've been very careful."