He scooted closer to her on the bed and wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulders. "Hey, I'm not trying to pry. I'm just curious."
"Well, can we not talk about this?" she asked looking up at him with a fearful expression across her face. She had no idea what would happen if she started talking about Jack at that moment. She might end up blurting out what had actually happened and with everything in such a delicate position in her life – both Ramsey and her emotional state of being – she wasn't sure she could handle it. He might turn and run in the opposite direction if he knew. That would be the logical thing to do.
"Yeah, sure, if that's what you want," he agreed. "I just don't want to see you hurt like that ever again."
"Maybe another time," she told him relaxing some into his body. She was so afraid to talk to Ramsey about relationships in the event that he would in turn ask her similar questions. But she was so curious about his past. Even though she knew it wasn't smart, and she had just refused to talk to him about what had happened she couldn't keep herself from asking, "Have you ever been in love?"
Ramsey stiffened at the question his entire body going rigid. Lexi glanced up into his eyes which had hardened. His jaw was set tight; his breathing controlled and even, as if he was thinking about each inhalation. Lexi had no idea that simple question would have elicited such a reaction, but she immediately regretted the decision to ask.
"Uh, sorry," Lexi said trying to do damage control. "I guess it's a sore subject. Don't be mad."
He breathed out heavily and turned to face her. His features had returned to their normal softness. "No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to flip out. You just caught me off guard."
"Oh. Sorry. Really, I didn't mean to pry."
"No need to apologize," he said waving off her apology. "I should have just answered. I've never been in love."
Lexi's eyes widened in surprise. That certainly had not been what she had expected. "What? Really? Haven't you ever had a girlfriend?"
"Not in the real sense of the word."
"Never?" she asked in disbelief.
"I've…dated," he said that word carefully, "a lot. I've just never had anyone hold my interest."
Lexi's mouth had fallen open at some point, and she had to force herself to close it. How could someone have gone through their entire life without a girlfriend…without ever being in love? She wasn't exactly good with relationships, well she was terrible, but she had been in love. Tragically in love, but still there was always that cliché statement – to love and lost is better than to never have loved at all.
She was reminded of Bekah's comment to her about Ramsey being a player. She didn't know how to take that now that she knew what kind of person Bekah really was. On the other hand, hadn't he just confirmed his player status?
And if nothing ever held his attention, why was he still after her? Was it because she denied him what he wanted? She didn't want to be something that he was only after for the chase. She didn't want him to get what he wanted then dismiss her out of boredom. If he could do that to other girls, he certainly could do that to her.
"Wow," she managed to get out. "That's…depressing."
Ramsey laughed aloud. "It's been kind of lonely if that's what you mean," he said pulling her into him.
"But you're so attractive."
He laughed again heartier this time. "Thank you. I feel as if that is a contributing factor in why I have never found someone to hold my interest. I've heard," he told her sliding his hand into her hair and beginning to massage her head and down to her neck, "that most women are interested in my appearance. This makes it rather difficult to find anyone who wants more than that, or if they do, they want my money."
"Uh huh," Lexi said closing her eyes as his worked his way down to her shoulder blades.
"You never seemed interested in either."
"I'm interested in your looks," she murmured cracking a smile.
"Oh really?" he asked kneading the knots out of her back.
"God, that feels good," Lexi huskily said pushing her body back against his. She was trying to suppress her physical desire for him, but the way his hands were moving just made that more and more difficult.
Ramsey groaned at the feel of her. "Yes, yes it does."
"Oh," Lexi said realizing that she had effectively pressed herself flush against him and that a simple massage was beginning to turn into much more if she didn't stop herself.
Ramsey turned her body around and stared into her big brown eyes. His eyes drifted lower landing on her lips. He smiled as she did the same thing. Coming forward his lips pressed firmly against hers. His tongue darted out opening her mouth and massaging her tongue with his. She groaned deep in her throat. Her hands came up and pushed up into his blonde hair egging him on. His arms wrapped around her waist pulling her closer.
Just as Lexi was about to scramble to strip his clothes off, he pulled back from her. "As much as I want to continue," he said his eyes smoldering with desire. "I know we should take this slow."
Lexi's bottom lip came out to pout involuntarily. Even though she knew that this was a bad idea that didn't mean she wanted to stop. He came forward and kissed her bottom lip. "We'll have plenty of time for the other stuff if I have anything to say about it," he said encouragingly.
After everything he had just told her about himself, could she really believe that he would stick this out? She presumed that as long as he didn't get what he wanted, then he would be around. But then she didn't understand why he would wait it out. Perhaps, there was more to him than she even knew. She really wanted to figure out the mystery behind Ramsey…but she wanted to do that without revealing her jaded love story.
She sighed and lay back against the bed. He wrapped his arms around her holding her close. At least in this moment, they could be content together with their secrets.
* * *
K.A. Linde
No Reason
Three days since the living room
I realized it's all my fault, but couldn't tell you
Yesterday you'd forgiven me
but it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry
-Barenaked Ladies "One Week"
* * *
Chapter 5: Present
"I think I gathered that. Thanks Seth," Lexi said rolling her eyes at his proclamation.
She felt like a complete idiot. She knew she should have listened to Ramsey when he said that she didn't want to be involved. Out of past experiences, she should have known better than to come along when he said it was in her best interest not to. She hadn't been able to stop herself though.
After such an abrupt interruption, she just needed to know what was going on. She didn't want any more secrets. If he couldn't tell her where he was running off to in the middle of the night, then she felt she had every right to join him where he was going.
Granted, he probably should have told her what was going on. It wasn't exactly fair to spring Jack's bachelor party on her. Ramsey knew her qualms with the situation and could have at least given her some kind of warning. How hard would it have been for him to say that it involved Jack?
She shook her head knowing exactly how she would have reacted in that situation. She would have run in the opposite direction if he'd said that.
Or at least she liked to think she would have. In reality, she knew that she would probably just been pissed off. One for him bringing Jack up at all, especially after they had agreed they wouldn't talk about that damn wedding. Two, for him interrupting what they were doing because of Jack. And lastly, because Jack was here at all!
What was he doing in New York?
Of all the places to have a bachelor party. Honestly!
She had heard the stories of Seth's big night in Las Vegas. She knew things about his strip club experiences and other such festivities that no girl should have to hear about. And now Jack had brought his bachelor party here, to her front door. It really didn't make any sense unless he wanted to see her.
Her heart started beating even faster than before. She knew the best man typically put together the bachelor party, but rarely without the groom's permission. She just couldn't imagine Jack coming here without some type of ulterior motive. Maybe it was naïve on her part to feel anything about Jack's motives. After all, she had never really been able to figure them out before, but could there really be a competing explanation?
He had lived here awhile himself so there was really no point in seeing the sights. He'd already done all of that. She didn't know for sure, but she guessed he had been to a strip club or two around here. So he was missing the element of a new surprising experience. He had some friends left in the city besides Lexi, but as far as she knew his old roommate, Stella, at least, had left. That, thankfully, ruled out that possibility.
Lexi vision was swimming as these thoughts filled her head. She didn't know why Jack had decided to come to New York. After their history, this city had to hold too many memories for him. He had been with Lexi here. He had screwed up everything with Lexi here, in this city. He had to know Lexi was in the city. And with his rapidly approaching marriage, she wouldn't think he would want to be reminded of all these emotions. Lexi had always been the masochist of the relationship, not Jack.
"So are you going to celebrate with us?" Seth asked swinging his arm across Lexi's shoulders, inexplicitly keeping her from falling backwards into a rather inviting black chair. She just wanted to sleep away the rest of the evening. Her stomach was in knots and she didn't know which way to move to clear away the mist that fell over her mind at the knowledge that Jack was here in this city…in this establishment.
"No, we're not here for that," Ramsey said glaring at Seth's hand making its way towards Lexi's breast. "So tell me the whole story this time. I need to know who I need to talk to."
Lexi snapped out of her trance as Seth's hand completely cupped her breast. She smacked his hand and he released her. His drunken brain must have processed that she wasn't a stripper…or it was just Seth.
"Yeah Seth what the f**k is going on?" Lexi asked shrugging his arm off her shoulder and taking a step away. She didn't want him to think about touching her like that again. She didn't care how drunk he was. "Why did you drag us out here?"
"Well I didn't know you were going to be with her or I would have called sooner," he told Ramsey as he turning to face Lexi. He moved closer placing his hands on her hips. He began to sway from side to side like a middle school couple at their first dance.
"Cut it out," Lexi said smacking his hands away as they came dangerously close to crossing the line into high school dancing where his were reaching down towards her ass. Seth dropped his hands and stumbled backwards a step.
"Yeah, you said Jack's missing and everything was stolen?" Ramsey prompted leaning towards Seth. He was a couple inches taller than him and towered over him as he demanded answers to his questions. He had been taken out of a very appealing situation because his future brother-in-law was missing at his own bachelor party. He did not want to have to deal with Bekah's wrath about this.
"Hunter. Luke," Seth called turning from Ramsey's determined gaze. "Did I tell him Jack was missing?"