I thought I heard him laugh, but his tongue was on me then, so I didn't much care if he was amused or not. Reaching down, I tangled my fingers in his hair. As I clenched and unclenched, he alternated patterns up, over, and across my tender flesh. I couldn't take anymore. As a burst of euphoria flooded through me, I cried out. Kellan gently brought me down, then worked his way back up my body.
When I was taffy beneath him, soft, warm, and pliable, and now a little sweaty, he murmured, "I can never get past H with you."
I had no idea what he meant, but I was reeling from my explosive release and didn't really care. "What?"
I languidly ran my hand up his back as he started grinding his h*ps against mine. He was turning me up again, and it was working, the fire was rekindling. His lips followed my collarbone. "The alphabet . . . I can never make it past H before you . . . finish." He peeked up at me with hooded eyes.
"What . . . are you talking about?" I muttered.
He ran his nose up my throat, lightly tasting my skin with his tongue. That miraculous tongue worked its way over to my ear, and that's when I finally caught on to what he was saying. I looked over at his amused face. "You're drawing the alphabet while you . . . ?"
He smiled, placing a light kiss on my slightly damp cheek. "It's been a goal of mine to make it through the entire alphabet, but I've yet to do it." His grin turned cocky. "I'll keep trying, though."
Kellan removed his boxers, then ground his h*ps against me again. The very tip of him moved into me and I gasped and clenched his back. When he pulled away, I groaned; he was killing me. "Has anyone done it to you?" I asked, restraining myself from grabbing his h*ps and forcing him to bury himself inside of me.
Kellan paused in kissing my neck. "The alphabet? No, I don't think so."
It was only then that I realized just what I'd asked him. Was that a strange question? Could that be done on a guy? Would he like that? Just the thought of doing that to him made my earlier desire resurface full force. He'd just satisfied me. If I could give him just a fraction of that . . .
Before he could say anything else, I pushed him back and started working my way down his chest. His breath hitched as he caught on to what I was planning to do. "I know it's not your thing, Kiera. You don't have to do something you don't like to please me." His eyes met mine as I peeked up at him. "I like tasting you, that's why I do it."
His words made an ache surge through me. Smiling into his belly button, I murmured, "No, it's not my favorite thing. But I like the way you react to it." I playfully bit into the lean muscle of his lower abdomen, and Kellan's eyes fluttered closed as he laid his head back on the pillow.
"Uh . . . 'kay," he mumbled.
His hand threaded through my hair as I kissed the tip of him. Not really sure what I was going to do, I gently took him into my mouth. This really wasn't my favorite thing, but hearing Kellan's reaction, the deep groan he made as he clenched my hair tight was one of my favorite things, and I focused on that. Working my hand over the long part of him, I alternated bringing him deep into my mouth and letting him go so I could run my tongue over the top of him. I drew a different letter each time I swirled around the tip. Around G I could tell that I was seriously driving him crazy. It drove me crazy too. I lost myself, getting more and more into it. Kellan's hand wrapped in my hair started shaking, like he was restraining himself from holding me down on him. On the letter L he was squirming around the bed, moaning my name. I nearly lost it, but I kept going with the elaborate tease. When I swirled my tongue around him in a giant O, he sat up and pulled me off of him as he moved to his knees. Before I knew what he was doing, his lips were on mine, hard, needy, and he moved me so I was straddling him. Without a word, he pulled my h*ps down, sinking me onto him-it stole my breath, it was so intense.
We held each other tight as we began to move together in a near frenzy; I'd never seen him so riled up. With cars still zipping past us, oblivious to our passion, I skyrocketed right over the edge. Kellan stiffened a fraction of a second later, plummeting as well. When we were both spent, we slumped in each other's arms. The driver behind us still looked apathetic, poor soul.
Carefully lifting myself from Kellan's lap, I collapsed onto the bed with a content sigh. Kellan snuggled up next to me, his breath erratic. As I twisted to cuddle into his chest, Kellan let out a low groan. "Oh . . . my . . . God . . . that was amazing."
Containing my smile, I murmured, "Well, looks like I didn't get to finish the alphabet either."
I felt a little wobbly when I made my way to the shower later. I could hear snoring on the other side of the curtain separating our room and the bathroom from the rest of the bus. Good, probably nobody had heard us. Wow, what a way to wake up. My mind and body were completely energized and the creative juices were flowing. I kept my shower brief so I could get started on writing.
Kellan was absent from our room when I went back to it, but it didn't take me long to find him. The bus was only so big, after all. Creeping past the people still slumbering, I made my way to the lounging area of the bus. The driver nodded at me and I waved, hoping he hadn't heard anything. I sometimes forgot about the drivers of our busses. This one was a sweet older man named Jonathan. Oh well, Jonathan was a professional bus driver for rock stars. I'm sure he'd heard and seen a lot.
Kellan was seated on a plush chair near a table, strumming his guitar. He peeked up at me and smiled, and I took a moment to just appreciate him before making my way over. He nodded his head at a steaming cup on the table. "Coffee? It's instant." He cringed. There was a small kitchen area near the bathrooms, with a microwave and a mini-fridge, but that was about it.
I graciously accepted the cup anyway. "Thank you."
Kellan watched me set up my notes and laptop, then returned to his guitar. We worked side by side for a while, with Kellan's guitar and my keyboard making the only sound. Then Kellan started humming a song. It wasn't a melody I'd heard before, and I paused the story in my head to listen to him work on something new. I guess I wasn't the only one who'd been inspired this morning. I loved that we could be together, but could be doing our own thing too. We each had our own lives, our own joys, our own friends. We weren't dependent on each other for happiness, but being together sure amplified the feeling.
As the minutes stretched on, I thought I could peacefully live out the rest of my days this way. Then an exclamation of surprise sounded from the back of the bus. Kellan and I both turned to look, but the curtain was still in place, and we couldn't see anything. We heard it, though. Or rather, we heard him.
Louder than was necessary, Griffin was repeating, "Oh my f**king God!" over and over. Other people grumbled, while a few more loudly shushed him; it was still pretty early. Dread bubbled in my stomach. I was really apprehensive about anything that could shock Griffin.
Kellan set down his guitar and stood up. "Why don't you stay here?" he said to me. For once, I did as he asked. My heart was beating harder as I watched the curtain swish closed behind Kellan.
I heard a slew of excited whispers and mumbled complaints. I really had no idea what was going on. The longer Kellan stayed back there, the more curious I became. I half-stood a handful of times, only to sit back down again. Did I really want to know? Yes . . . and no.
When I finally couldn't stand it, Kellan remerged. Maybe it was my imagination, but he looked a little paler. As he approached me, I thought I heard my cell phone going off in the very back of the bus. After it silenced, it went off again.
Kellan quietly sat in the chair next to me while Griffin peeked his head out of the curtain. I couldn't tell if the look on his face was incredulity, excitement, or just uncontainable curiosity. He was pulled back into the sleeping section seconds later. My eyes were wide and fearful, my belly full of dread as I locked gazes with Kellan. "What?" I whispered.
Kellan scrunched his brow, almost like he was at a loss for words. My cell phone was still incessantly ringing. While he thought, I murmured, "Maybe I should get that. It could be my sister."
Kellan's expression darkened. "I wouldn't be surprised."
"Kellan?"
Sighing, he placed a hand on my knee and said, "Joey leaked the tape. It's all anyone is talking about this morning."
My heart sank, but it quickly evened out. I'd been expecting this bombshell. "Oh, you had me worried for a minute." Kellan chewed on his lip, and I instantly knew there was more. "What?" I muttered.
He rubbed his thumb around the temple of his skull, like he had a headache. "Joey's camera was . . . f**king fabulous." His tone was harsh and sarcastic. Pausing his mind massage, he looked up at me. "It's so grainy that she's hard to make out, so, because of Nick shoving me onto this tour, and all of the stories, photos, and speculation, everyone is just assuming that I'm doing-"
My heart stopped. "They think you made a sex tape with Sienna."
Kellan nodded. "They look enough alike that it's a really easy mistake to make. Plus, the angle wasn't that great, and there's no date on the tape. The only clear thing about it is that it's definitely me." He rolled his eyes. "There is this one clear shot of my face, since I . . . started the recording . . . and Joey says my name a lot."
A wave of nausea rolled through me, but I pushed it back. He'd made that tape a long time ago. "Oh, should you say something?"
"Yes, absolutely, but . . ." Kellan shrugged. "I'm not so sure that it will matter. People will believe what they want to believe." He closed his eyes that suddenly looked very tired. "Even Griffin believes it's Sienna on the tape." Reopening his eyes, he cupped my cheek. "I'm sorry, but I think I just unintentionally gave them the irrefutable proof they were looking for. I don't think it's possible to stop this now."
Knowing he was probably right, I let out a weary sigh. We couldn't just make a statement and think that everyone would suddenly understand what was really going on. The public was too in love with the idea of Kellan and Sienna as a couple. No one had really believed Kellan before this tape exploded in our faces. They definitely wouldn't believe him now. With Kellan's very first "No comment" response, we had unwittingly helped fuel up a locomotive. Nick and Sienna had then taken control and sent it barreling down the tracks, and this sex tape had just snapped the brake lines. The gossip train was out of control now. All we could do was wait for its inevitable crash and hope we all survived the wreckage.
I pushed my computer away, no longer inspired.
I fielded phone calls after that, a lot of phone calls-my sister, Jenny, Cheyenne, Kate, and horrifyingly enough, my parents. They thankfully hadn't watched the videos or seen any still shots, but even my mom and dad couldn't escape the global gossip of Kellan and Sienna's sex tape. I don't think my mom believed me when I told her the wedding was still on.
I finally calmed my parents down, but every single one of my friends had to be "convinced" that the video was years old. Eventually it came down to the tattoo. I gave all of them the assignment of watching the video and looking at Kellan's chest. If my name wasn't engraved above his heart, then they would know without a doubt that it was filmed before we were a couple. That fact wouldn't help me with the general public, since not a lot of people knew about his tattoo as it had been cleverly covered up for the music video, but it swayed my friends. By the time I hung up with them, they grudgingly believed me.
Denny was the last phone call of the day-and the one I'd been dreading the most. I was sitting on the bed I shared with Kellan when my phone rang. The bus had stopped a while ago, and the numerous roadies were out in force, setting up tonight's show. I had no idea what city we were in; I'd already lost track.
The boys were all out exploring, probably introducing Holeshot to their little drinking game. The two bands meshed together well, which didn't surprise me; the D-Bags were an easy-going group, they got along with most people. Kellan had asked me to go out with him, but I didn't want to. Then he'd offered to stay in with me, but I didn't want that either. I wanted to be alone, staring at the rain streaking down the windowpane and contemplating the strangeness of my life. After he'd gone, I'd found a flower petal taped to the bathroom mirror with the words I'm sorry on it. I knew he was. I was sorry too.