“I can remind you,” he purred.
“Don’t you have a job to get to? Because I do.”
Gideon pressed against my back. “Come work with me.”
“And pour your coffee while waiting for you to f**k me?”
“I’m serious.”
“So am I.” I spun so quickly to face him that I knocked my purse onto the floor. “I have a job and I like it a lot. You know that.”
“And you’re good at it.” He gripped my shoulders. “Be good at it for me.”
“I can’t, for the same reason I didn’t accept help from my stepfather. I want to make it on my own!”
“I know that. I respect that about you.” His hands caressed my arms. “I clawed my way up, too, with the Cross name trying to drag me down. I’d never take the effort away from you. You wouldn’t get anything you didn’t earn.”
I suppressed the twinge of sympathy I felt for Gideon’s suffering over his father, a Ponzi scheme swindler who’d taken his own life rather than face jail time. “Do you really think anyone is going to believe I got the job for any reason other than I’m the chick you’re sticking it to now?”
“Shut up.” He shook me. “You’re pissed off and that’s fine, but don’t talk about us that way.”
I pushed at him. “Everyone else will.”
Growling, he released me. “You signed up for a CrossTrainer membership even though you’ve got Equinox and Krav Maga. Explain why.”
I pivoted to yank a pair of panties on so I wasn’t arguing while buck nak*d. “That’s different.”
“It’s not.”
I faced him again, stepping on stuff that had fallen out of my purse, which only made me madder. “Waters Field and Leaman isn’t in competition with Cross Industries! You use the agency’s services yourself.”
“Do you think you’ll never work on a campaign for one of my competitors?”
Standing there in his unbuttoned vest and impeccable tie, he was making it hard for me to think properly. He was beautiful and passionate and everything I’d ever wanted, which made it nearly impossible for me to deny him anything.
“That’s not the point. I won’t be happy, Gideon,” I said with quiet honesty.
“Come here.” He held his arms open for me and hugged me when I walked into them. He spoke with his lips against my temple. “One day, the ‘Cross’ in Cross Industries won’t refer to just me.”
My anger and frustration simmered. “Can we not talk about this now?”
“One last thing: You can apply for a position just like anyone else, if that’s the way you need to do it. I won’t interfere. If you get the job, you’d be working on a different floor of the Crossfire and climbing the career ladder all on your own. Whether you advance won’t be up to me.”
“It’s important to you.” It wasn’t a question.
“Of course it is. We’re working hard to build a future together. This is a natural step in that direction.”
I nodded reluctantly. “I have to be independent.”
His hand cupped my nape, holding me close. “Don’t forget what matters most. If you work hard and show skill and talent, that’s what people will base their judgments on.”
“I have to get ready for work.”
Gideon searched my face, then kissed me softly.
He released me and I bent down to pick up my purse. Then I noticed that I’d stepped on my mirrored compact and shattered its case. I wasn’t heartbroken over it, because I could always pick up another at Sephora on the way home. What froze my blood was the electrical wire sticking out of the cracked plastic.
Gideon crouched down to help me. I looked at him. “What is this?”
He took the compact from me and broke off more of the shell to expose a microchip with a small antenna. “A bug, maybe. Or a tracking device.”
I looked at him with horror. My lips moved silently. The police?
“I’ve got jammers in the apartment,” he answered, shocking me further. “And no. There’s no way any judge would’ve authorized a tap on you. There’s nothing to justify it.”
“Jesus.” I fell back on my ass, feeling sick.
“I’ll have my guys look at it.” He lowered to his knees and brushed the hair back from my face. “Could it be your mother?”
I stared at him helplessly.
“Eva—”
“My God, Gideon.” I held him off with an uplifted hand and grabbed my phone with the other. I dialed Clancy, my stepfather’s bodyguard, and the moment he answered, I said, “Is the bug in my compact one of yours?”
There was a pause, then, “Tracking device, not a bug. Yes.”
“For fuck’s sake, Clancy!”
“It’s my job.”
“Your job sucks,” I shot back, picturing him in my head. Clancy was solid muscle. He wore his dirty-blond hair in a military crew cut and radiated a vibe that was deadly dangerous. But I wasn’t afraid of him. “This is bullshit and you know it.”
“Keeping you safe became a bigger concern when Nathan Barker showed up again. He was slippery, so I had to cover both of you. The minute his death was confirmed, I turned off the receiver.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “This isn’t about the damn tracker! I don’t have a problem with that. It’s the keeping-me-in-the-dark part that’s wrong on so many levels. I feel violated, Clancy.”
“I don’t blame you, but Mrs. Stanton didn’t want you to worry.”
“I’m an adult! I get to decide if I worry or not.” I shot a look at Gideon when I said that, because what I was saying was totally applicable to him, too.
His arch look told me he got the message.
“You won’t hear me arguing,” Clancy said gruffly.
“You owe me,” I told him, knowing just how I was going to collect. “Big-time.”
“You know where to find me.”
I killed the call, then sent a text to my mom: We need to talk.
My shoulders sagged with disappointment and frustration.
“Angel.”
I shot Gideon a look that warned him not to push me. “Don’t you dare make excuses—for yourself or for her.”
His eyes were soft and shadowed, but the set of his jaw was resolute. “I was there when you were told Nathan was in New York. I saw your face. There’s no one who loves you who wouldn’t do whatever they could to shield you from that.”
And that was really hard for me to deal with, because I couldn’t deny that I was glad I hadn’t known about Nathan until after he was dead. But I also didn’t want to be insulated from bad things. They were part of living.
Reaching for his hand, I gripped it tightly. “I feel the same way about you.”
“I’ve taken care of my demons.”
“And mine.” But we were still sleeping apart from each other. “I want you to go back to Dr. Petersen,” I said quietly.
“I went on Tuesday.”
“You did?” I couldn’t hide my surprise at learning he’d kept his regular schedule.
“Yeah, I did. I only missed the one appointment.”
When he’d killed Nathan …
His thumb brushed over the back of my hand. “It’s just you and me now,” he said, as if he’d read my mind.
I wanted to believe that.
I was dragging when I got to work, which wasn’t a good omen for the rest of the day. At least it was Friday and I could be a slug over the weekend, which would probably be a necessity Sunday morning if I partied too hard Saturday night. I hadn’t had a girls’ night out in ages and I felt the need for a good stiff drink or two.
In the previous forty-eight hours, I’d learned that my boyfriend had killed my rapist, one of my exes was hoping to spread me across his sheets, one of my boyfriend’s exes was hoping to smear him in the press, and my mother had microchipped me like a damned dog.
Really, how much was a girl supposed to take?
“You ready for tomorrow?” Megumi queried, after she buzzed me through the glass doors.
“Hell, yeah. My friend Shawna texted me this morning and she’s in.” I mustered a genuine smile. “I arranged for a club limo for us. You know … one of those that take you to all the VIP spots, cover included.”
“What?” She couldn’t hide her excitement, but still had to ask, “How much is that?”
“Nada. It’s a favor from a friend.”
“Some favor.” Her grin made me happy, too. “This is going to be awesome! You’ll have to tell me the deets over lunch.”
“You’re on. I expect you to dish about your lunch yesterday, too.”
“Talk about mixed signals, right?” she complained. “ ‘We’re just having fun,’ but he shows his face at my work? I would never pop into a guy’s office for an impromptu lunch if we were just messing around.”
“Men,” I huffed sympathetically, even as I acknowledged that I was grateful for the one who was mine.
I went to my desk and got ready to start my workday. When I saw the framed photos of Gideon and me in my drawer, I was struck by the need to reach out to him. Ten minutes later, I’d asked Angus to place an order for black magic roses to be sent to Gideon’s office with the note:
You’ve got me under your spell.
I’m still thinking about you.
Mark came to my cubicle just as I was closing the window on my browser. One look at his face and I could tell he wasn’t doing so hot. “Coffee?” I asked.
He nodded and I stood. We headed to the break room together.
“Shawna was over last night,” he began. “She said you’re going out tomorrow night.”
“Yes. Is that still okay with you?”
“Is what still okay?”
“If your sister-in-law and I hang out,” I prodded.
“Oh … yeah. Sure. Go for it.” He ran a restless hand over his short, dark curls. “I think it’s cool.”
“Great.” I knew there was more on his mind, but I didn’t want to push. “Should be fun. I’m looking forward to it.”
“So is she.” He reached for two single-serving coffee pods, while I took mugs from the shelf. “She’s also looking forward to Doug getting back. And popping the question.”
“Wow. Now that’s cool! Two weddings in your family in a year. Unless you’re planning a long engagement … ?”
He handed the first cup of coffee to me and I went to the fridge for half-and-half.
“It’s not going to happen, Eva.”
Mark’s tone was weighted with dejection, and when I turned to face him, his head was down.
I patted his shoulder. “Did you propose?”
“No. There’s no point. He was asking Shawna if she and Doug were planning on having kids right away, since she’s still in school part-time, and when she said they weren’t, he went into this lecture about how marriage is for couples ready for a family. Otherwise, it’s better to keep things simple. It’s the same crap I once shoveled to him.”
I rounded him and lightened my coffee. “Mark, you won’t know Steven’s answer until you ask him.”
“I’m scared,” he admitted, looking into his steaming mug. “I want more than we’ve got, but I don’t want to ruin what we have. If his answer is no and he thinks we want different things out of our relationship …”
“Cart before the horse, boss.”
“What if I can’t live with no?”
Ah … I could understand that. “Can you live with not knowing for sure either way?”
He shook his head.
“Then you have to tell him everything you’ve told me,” I said sternly.
His mouth quirked. “Sorry to keep dumping this on you. But you’re always great at giving me perspective.”
“You know what to do. You just want a kick in the ass to do it. I’m always up for ass-kicking.”
He smiled full on. “Let’s not work on the divorce attorney’s campaign today.”
“How about the airline instead?” I suggested. “I have some ideas.”
“All right, then. Let’s hit it.”
WE hard-charged through the morning, and I was energized by our progress. I wanted to keep Mark too occupied to worry. Work was a cure-all for me, and it quickly became clear that it was for him as well.
We’d just wrapped up for lunch and I had stopped by my desk to drop off my tablet when I saw the interoffice envelope on my desk. My pulse leaped with excitement and my hands shook slightly as I unwound the thin twine and let the note card inside slide out.
YOU’RE THE MAGIC.
YOU MAKE DREAMS COME TRUE.
X
I held the card to my chest, wishing it were the writer I was holding instead. I was thinking about sprinkling rose petals on our bed when my desk phone rang. I wasn’t all that surprised when I heard my mother’s breathy bombshell voice on the other end.
“Eva. Clancy talked to me. Please don’t be upset! You have to understand—”
“I get it.” I opened my drawer and tucked Gideon’s precious note into my purse. “Here’s the thing: You don’t have Nathan as an excuse anymore. If you’ve got any more bugs or trackers or whatever in my stuff, you better fess up now. Because I promise you, if I find something else moving forward, our relationship will be irrevocably damaged.”
She sighed. “Can we talk in person, please? I’m taking Cary out to lunch and I’ll just stay over until you get home.”
“All right.” The irritation that had started prickling at me dissipated just as quickly as it had come up. I loved that my mother treated Cary like the brother he was to me. She gave him the maternal love he’d never had. And they were both so appearance- and fashion-conscious that they always had a blast together.