Paige removed all the sternal wires from the operation the day before. She then cut from the base of the neck to the lower end of the sternum, while one of the residents blotted away the blood with gauze pads.
She carefully went through the layers of fat and muscle, and in front of her was the erratically beating heart. "There's the problem," Paige said. "The atrium is perforated. Blood is collecting around the heart and compressing it." Paige was looking at the monitor on the wall. The pump pressure had dropped dangerously. "Increase the flow," Paige ordered. The door to the operating room opened and Lawrence Barker stepped in. He stood to one side, watching what was happening.
Paige said, "Dr. Barker. Do you want to . . .?"
"It's your operation."
Paige took a quick look at what Koch was doing. "Be careful. You'll overanesthetize him, dammit! Slow it down!"
"But I . . ."
"He's in V-tach! His pressure is dropping!"
"What do you want me to do?" Koch asked helplessly.
He should know, Paige thought angrily. "Give him lidocaine and epinephrine! Now!" She was yelling.
"Right."
Paige watched as Koch picked up a syringe and injected it into the patient's IV.
A resident looked at the monitor and called out, "Blood pressure is falling."
Paige was working frantically to stop the flow of blood. She looked up at Koch. "Too much flow! I told you to . . ."
The noise of the heartbeat on the monitor suddenly became chaotic.
"My God! Something's gone wrong!"
"Give me the defibrillator!" Paige yelled.
The circulating nurse reached for the defibrillator on the crash cart, opened two sterile paddles, and plugged them in. She turned the buttons up to charge them and ten seconds later handed them to Paige.
She took the paddles and positioned them directly over Kelly's heart. Kelly's body jumped, then fell back.
Paige tried again, willing him to come back to life, willing him to breathe again. Nothing. The heart lay still, a dead, useless organ.
Paige was in a fury. Her part of the operation had been successful. Koch had overanesthetized the patient.
As Paige was applying the defibrillator to Lanct Kelly's body for the third futile time, Dr. Barker stepped up to the operating table and turned to Paige. "You killed him."
Chapter Twenty-seven
Jason was in the middle of a design meeting when I his secretary said, "Dr. Taylor is on the phone for I you. Shall I tell her you'll call back?"
"No. I'll take it." Jason picked up the phone. "Paige?"
"Jason ... I need you!" She was sobbing.
"What happened?"
"Can you come to the apartment?"
"Of course. I'll be right there." He stood up. "The meeting is over. We'll pick it up in the morning."
Half an hour later, Jason was at the apartment. Paige opened the door and threw her arms around him. Her eyes were red from crying.
"What happened?" Jason asked.
"It's awful! Dr. Barker told me I ... I killed a patient, and honestly, it ... it wasn't my fault!" Her voice broke. "I can't take any more of his . . ."
"Paige," Jason said gently, "you've told me how mean he always is. That's the man's character."
Paige shook her head. "It's more than that. He's been trying to force me out since the day I started working with him. Jason, if he were a bad doctor and didn't think I was any good, I wouldn't mind so much, but the man is brilliant. I have to respect his opinion. I just don't think I'm good enough."
"Nonsense," Jason said angrily. "Of course you are. Everyone I talk to says you're a wonderful doctor."
"Not Lawrence Barker."
"Forget Barker."
"I'm going to," Paige said. "I'm quitting the hospital."
Jason took her in his arms. "Paige, I know you love the profession too much to give it up."
"I won't give it up. I just never want to see that hospital again."
Jason took out a handkerchief and dried Paige's tears.
"I'm sorry to bother you with all of this," Paige said.
"That's what husbands-to-be are for, isn't it?"
She managed a smile. "I like the sound of that. All right." Paige took a deep breath. "I feel better now. Thanks for talking to me. I telephoned Dr. Wallace and told him I was quitting. I'm going over to the hospital and see him now."
"I'll see you at dinner tonight."
Paige walked through the corridors of the hospital, knowing that she was seeing them for the last time. There were the familiar noises and the people hurrying up and down the corridors. It had become more of a home to her than she'd realized. She thought of Jimmy and Chang, and all the wonderful doctors she had worked with. Darling Jason going on rounds with her in his white coat. She passed the cafeteria where she and Honey and Kat had had a hundred breakfasts, and the lounge, where they had tried to have a party. The corridors and rooms were full of so many memories. I'm going to miss it, Paige thought, but I refuse to work under the same roof as that monster.
She went up to Dr. Wallace's office. He was waiting for her.
"Well, I must say, your telephone call surprised me, Paige! Have you definitely made up your mind?"
"Yes."
Benjamin Wallace sighed. "Very well. Before you go, Dr. Barker would like to see you."
"I want to see him." All of Paige's pent-up anger boiled to the surface.
"He's in the lab. Well . . . good luck."
"Thanks." Paige headed for the lab.