She hated herself. Peter was kind and gentle. He thought he loved her. She didn’t really know and she wasn’t the type of woman to dispute his emotions. Laura turned from him and went through to her room and grabbed her diary. He followed her inside.
“I care about you, Peter. Really, I do. You’ve read this before and I think you should read it again. I don’t need it anymore.” Laura handed over her diary and grabbed her bag. “I’m going to work. Don’t wait up for me.”
The walk to the diner was slow and exhausting. She rubbed away the tears from her eyes for the thousandth time. People walked past her and she felt their stares.
The diner was busy considering it was almost Christmas. The changing area was dead when she walked in. Her locker stood in the far corner.
She thought back over the past few months and how quickly her life had changed. About five months ago she’d stood in this very spot thinking about Dean Riley and her unbearable crush on him. Her feelings hadn’t changed. She loved him still and she wished with all of her heart she could forget him and move on and love Peter the way he deserved.
Laura made herself move to the diner, her uniform hung from her body from the weight loss. She went through the same motions, taking orders and pouring coffee. Nothing mattered to her anymore. The life she’d wanted ceased to exist. Even her writing had stopped.
For the rest of the night she tuned out her own pain and carried on with her work, disregarding the pain in her whole body. Her hands shook and every time she moved she felt dizzy. She was pouring more coffee into a mug when the world went black.
Chapter Eighteen
Dean sat at his kitchen table nursing a headache. Last night the final proofs for his story had been sorted and he’d hit the whisky, a little too hard. The sudden banging on the door made his head feel like exploding.
“I’m coming,” he croaked and walked the short distance in his apartment from kitchen to the front door.
Peter Miller stormed through the door.
“Why have you come here?” Dean asked the young man. The last conversation he had with him had resulted in the end of his world.
“Because I care about Laura. Since you’ve been gone, she doesn’t live anymore. She only exists,” Peter told him.
Shit. Dean couldn’t deal with this. Not now.
“You’re the one who said she could love you,” he said to Peter.
“I lied,” said Peter.
Dean felt his gut twist and he turned from the accusing stare of the man younger than him. He walked back through to his kitchen and took some pills to ease his head.
“Laura, deserves something better and that something that isn’t me,” Peter told him, pointing to his own chest.
Dean snorted and swallowed his coffee. His head was easing in a matter of moments.
“If you could see her, you wouldn’t be arguing with me right now," Peter continued. "She’s dying, Mr Riley.”
He stopped and looked at the younger man who stood back from the table.
“What the f**k are you talking about? You told me to stay away from her, remember? I was a perverted bastard using her for sex,” he reminded Peter.
“Well, were you using her?” Peter asked.
“I f**king wasn’t. I loved Laura. I still do, but you told me she could get better. This is me staying away. I don’t even want to talk about the amount of times I’ve gotten in my car, ready to drive back to her. I promised I’d stay away.”
“Laura’s pregnant.”
Dean stared at him. “What did you say?”
“She’s pregnant, Dean. She’s in the hospital after collapsing. The doctors don’t think the baby’s going to survive. The stress and all the additional work she’s been doing has made her weak,” Peter informed him.
“Work? She should be back in college.”
“She dropped out, Dean. She’s been living with me and trying to save money to be ready for the baby’s arrival. It’s funny. I warned you that she’d be the brunt of all the gossip with you in town. Now with you away, she’s the brunt of gossip for being pregnant.”
Dean stared at the table. Laura was pregnant with his baby and she was in the hospital.
“I’ll step aside. Laura needs you and I didn’t see it before. I loved her and thought I could do the better loving. I was a fool,” Peter admitted.
Dean grabbed his coat and followed the younger man out of his apartment. He hadn’t moved far from Cape Falls because the thought of not being a quick drive away from Laura had frightened him.
Peter drove and was probably breaking every speed limit. An hour later they pulled up at the hospital. Peter quickly found a parking space and together they walked inside the hospital. Dean followed Peter to the maternity wing.
“She doesn’t know you’re here. Just give me a minute,” Peter told him and went ahead into a room.
Dean watched the room. Laura’s in there, the woman you love and who you gave up like the ass**le you are. She's laying in the bed, scared and alone.
He knew then that when he entered that room he would have to make a decision. He glanced down at his finger where Carla’s wedding ring still sat.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’ve got to move on,” he said quietly. He removed the ring and fisted it in his hand. Peter came to the door and nodded for him to come in.
“I brought someone for you to see,” Peter said to Laura.
Dean walked round the door and his world collapsed. Laura was sitting up in bed. She looked terrible and beautiful at the same time. She gasped and they stared at one another.
“You said you didn’t want me,” she whispered.
“I’ve got something to tell you, Laura. I was the one who told him to leave. I thought I could love you more and give you everything that he couldn’t,” Peter admitted.
Laura remained silent and Dean nodded for Peter to leave. The door closed and Laura and Dean stared at each other.
“You’re here,” she said.
“I’m here and I’m not going anywhere,” he told her as he moved to the bed. “I’ve been an idiot. I made a promise to my wife that I would never love another woman they way I loved her.”
“And you do?”
“Fuck me, Laura. I’m so f**king in love with you it scares me,” he admitted and suddenly felt as if a great weight had been eased from his shoulders.
“But...”
“Don’t talk. Peter came to me after I took Kimmy to that dinner. I want to tell you that Kimmy was Carla’s friend. She came to see the woman I’d fallen in love with. Can you imagine how I felt? I’m a man of forty, successful, and my gut and heart was being twisted and pulled by a woman twenty years my junior.”