Perry took it carefully from her hand. “You kept this.”
“Of course I did,” she said. “You gave it to me.”
She’d taken it all the way to Rim and back.
Perry ran his thumb over it. A faint smile came to his lips. “I should give you one of my arrows. I make better arrows than falcons.”
Aria bit her lip, dread snaking in her stomach. He was making small talk. Almost everyone had loaded up. Only a few people were left, making their way into the Hovers.
He lifted his head, and the look in his eyes made her breath catch. “I didn’t know how to say this, Aria.”
“Just tell me what it is. You’re scaring me.”
She saw tears in his eyes, and she knew what he’d say before he uttered a word.
“I have to go with Cinder. I can’t let him go alone.”
38
PEREGRINE
Perry saw the exact moment that Aria understood. Her eyes flew open and her temper washed over him, pure ice. He kept talking, trying to explain.
“Cinder is going in his own Hover. . . . He’ll have to pull ahead of the fleet at the barrier of Aether, and I’m going with him.” His throat felt like it was closing up, but he pressed ahead. “What’s out there sounds bigger than anything any of us has ever seen. And you know the way he is afterward. If it doesn’t kill him, he’ll be close to dying. Maybe . . . maybe he won’t come out of it.”
Perry stared at the tufts of sea grass by his foot, unable to look at her anymore. He watched the fine blades blowing in the wind, and drew a few trembling breaths before he continued.
“I’m the only person he trusts. The only one. How can I ask him to go out there for us, if I won’t fight for him—for his life? And he’s terrified, Aria. If I’m not with him, I don’t know if he’ll go through with it. We’d all lose if that happened.”
Perry had talked it over with Marron and Cinder earlier in the Battle Room. He and Marron had even planned for the possible outcomes, and who would lead the Tides should he not make it back. Then Marron had left to speak to the Tides and, after, to arrange everything with Sable.
Now Perry looked up. Tears brimmed in Aria’s eyes. Discussing the consequences of his death had been easier than telling her that he had to leave her.
“I’ll go with you,” she said.
“No. Aria, you can’t.”
“Why not? Why is it all right for you to go?”
“Because I need you to watch Talon.” He let out a breath, frustrated with himself. That hadn’t come out right. “What I meant is that if I don’t come back, Molly will take him, but I want him to grow up knowing you and Roar. We don’t have any family left, but you—” His voice snagged. He swallowed. Couldn’t believe the things coming from his mouth. “You and Roar are that to me. And I want Talon to have you both. For anything he needs.”
“Perry, how can I say no to that?” she said desperately.
He knew she couldn’t.
“So are we saying good-bye?”
“Only for a while.”
Movement further along the bluff drew his attention. The Six were approaching, their strides long and faces grim. Others, too. Proof that word had spread despite his hope it wouldn’t. He didn’t want to say four hundred good-byes. He couldn’t bear it. This one with Aria had already broken him open.
Quickly, he pulled Aria close. “Do you hate me?”
“You know I don’t.”
“You should.”
“I don’t,” she said again. “How could I ever?”
He kissed her head and then spoke with his lips on her skin, like he might make what he said more permanent. More true. “I promise you,” he whispered. “We’ll both get there, and I’ll find you.”
He would do it. If he survived.
39
ARIA
Aria watched Perry as he spoke with the each of the Six. Gren and Twig first. Then Hyde, Hayden, and Straggler. He went to Reef last, and then moved on, speaking with Molly and Bear.
She didn’t hear anything they said. Their words were lost to her. Their clasped hands and fierce embraces seemed unreal. Brooke came over, linking arms with her. Aria felt surprise and gratitude, faint and quickly fading away.
Some time later she found herself in front of a Dragonwing. It was like someone had flipped a switch to shut her off, carried her there, and powered her back on.
Cinder, Willow, and Talon sat on the edge of the Hover, legs swinging as they took turns tossing a ball to Flea. Aria blinked, recognition filtering through her dulled mind. It was a tennis ball, the lime green bright as a shout in the gray dawn. She stared at it, marveling over the artifact, this thing that had been absent. Preserved for hundreds of years. Had the owner decided it wasn’t worth bringing on the journey to the Still Blue? Had it been carefully guarded for lifetimes only to end up in Flea’s mouth?
She heard Roar’s voice behind her, and turned.
“I never should have introduced you to Cinder,” he said to Perry.
“You didn’t,” Perry replied.
They stood alone, some twenty paces off. The crowds had thinned; most everyone had loaded into the Hovers already. Aether clawed down across the sky, the sound of the funnels loud in her ears. They were leaving just in time. The funnels were almost on top of them.
“But you met him because of me,” Roar said.
“Yeah.” Perry crossed his arms. “I did.”
They both looked over, noticing her. Neither of them looked away. They watched her, their faces grave and worried, like they thought she might blow right off the edge of the bluff. Nearby, one of the Hover engines buzzed to life. Then another and another, until her ears filled with the sound, and she didn’t hear the Aether shrieking anymore.
Her attention moved to a group coming toward them.
Horn guards. Her father. And Sable.
It was almost time to leave.
As Roar spoke again to Perry, Aria found herself, shutting out the sounds of the Hovers, the wind and the surf below, and the storms, focusing solely on them.
“I don’t like this idea, Perry.”
“I knew you wouldn’t.”
Roar nodded. “Right.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “We’ll be waiting for you.”
Perry had told Aria that he’d return, but he made no such promise to Roar now. As the pause stretched out between them, she wondered if Perry had only said what she’d wanted to hear.
“All right then, brother,” Roar said at last.
They embraced—quickly, firmly—something Aria realized she’d never seen before and never wanted to see again. It made them look scared and breakable, and they weren’t. They were magnificent, both of them.
Perry moved closer and called to Talon, who jumped down and met his uncle. Kneeling, Perry took Talon’s face in his hands, and then Talon was crying and she had to look away.
Her father and Sable were almost there. Wind pushed Loran’s black hair into his eyes, but Sable’s was just a shadow over his skull.
As she watched them approach, her conversation with Perry played over in her mind. He had told her that he would come back. Hadn’t he? What had she said to him? Had she been rude or ungrateful, like the last time she’d seen her mother?
The last time.
This couldn’t be.
Was it?
She could have lived every minute she’d had with him better. She should have always spoken the best words she could to him.
Sable arrived, his face flushed, his eyes full of energy. He stood talking with Loran, but Aria knew he was watching everything.
Perry hugged Talon and then sent him with Roar to board a Hovercraft. Then he came to her side and she took his hand, her weak hand somehow clinging to his scarred one. She wanted to firm her grip, to create an unbreakable grasp that would keep him close forever, but he’d chosen a path. And though she ached to stop him, she wouldn’t.
They watched Roar pick Talon up like he was a child of four instead of eight. Tears streamed down Talon’s face as he wrapped his arms around Roar’s throat. He was shouting, but Aria couldn’t hear a word he was saying. Willow ran ahead with Flea. Without seeing her face, Aria knew that she was crying too.
“Ready, Cinder?” Sable’s voice was like a hook pulling her back to reality.
Cinder tugged his black hat lower and drew his legs up into the Hover. He glanced at Sable, and then away, to Roar and Willow and Talon, who were boarding another Hover farther down the bluff.
Cinder appeared grown to Aria then, more a man than a boy. At some point in the course of his being kidnapped and held prisoner, the bones in his jaw and cheeks had widened, taking on more heft. He had a handsome face, an appealing mix of broodiness and confidence that sat just right on his features.
When she’d met Cinder, he’d lashed at her and Perry and Roar while trailing after them like a lost child. That time in the woods seemed so long ago. He fit now. He had achieved the same thing she wanted herself. Cinder had found Perry. He’d found Willow and Flea and Molly. He had a place. A family.
Aria understood why Perry was going with him. And she hated that she understood.
“Thank you for what you’re doing,” Sable said.
Aria glanced at Loran. Did he hear Sable’s falseness? He was an Aud; surely he had to.
“I’m not doing anything for you,” Cinder snapped. He stood and disappeared into the craft.
“So long as he does it,” Sable said, with a small shrug. He turned to Perry. “We went through a good deal of trouble getting here, didn’t we? Suffered a few bruises along the way, but the important thing is that we made it. Everything is prepared. The Dragonwing will be controlled remotely by one of the pilots on my craft. We’ll get you close, Peregrine. All you and Cinder have to do is the rest.”
He had the nerve to make it seem as if he were doing the difficult part. She could hear Perry’s breath beside her, fast and irregular. As hard as this was for her, it was so much worse for him.
Sable inclined his head. “Good luck.”
Aria didn’t even see Perry’s face before he hugged her. “I’ll be thinking about you,” he said, lifting her off the ground. “I love you.”
She said it back, and that was it.
All that mattered. Everything there was to say.
40
PEREGRINE
The hatch closed the moment Perry boarded the Hover, controlled by some unseen Dweller under Sable’s command.
He fell into the pilot seat, concentrating on breathing. Just breathing in and out, and not thinking about what had just happened. In the chair beside him, Cinder gripped the armrests as he stared through the windshield.
“There you are, Peregrine.” Sable’s voice filled the small cockpit. “I can see both of you, but I’m told you can only hear me.”
Perry rubbed a hand over his face and sat up, forcing himself to gather his wits. “I hear you,” he said. He wondered if Roar or Aria was also there, watching and listening. He doubted it.
Their Hover was docked on the edge of the bluff. Outside, past fifty yards of dirt and sea grass, there was only sky. Only Aether. Perry had to stop himself from imagining shooting off the bluff and dropping to the coastline below.