‘Maggie.’ Leah yanked the dress down farther. ‘It’s a prom. Not a sisterhood retreat.’
‘And this may be the last big thing we all do together before college. It’s almost August, the summer is practically over.’
‘Don’t,’ Esther threatened, pointing at her. ‘Remember the rules. No waxing nostalgic until the twentieth. We agreed.’
‘I know, I know,’ Maggie said, fluttering her hands in front of her face. She walked over to the bed, sitting down with the black dress across her lap. ‘I just… I can’t believe that it’s all really going to be over soon. This time next year, everything will be different.’
‘God, I hope so.’
‘Leah!’
Leah looked over from the mirror, where she was eyeing her reflection. ‘What? So I’m hoping a year from now I’ll have a great boyfriend and total life satisfaction. A girl can dream, can’t she?’
‘This is not so bad, though,’ Maggie said. ‘What we have, and had. It’s not.’
‘No,’ I said, pushing aside another couple of dresses. ‘It isn’t.’
I just sort of said this, not really thinking. It wasn’t until the room got quiet that I realized they were all looking at me. ‘See,’ Maggie said, nodding at me. ‘Auden understands.’
‘She understood about Tallyho, too,’ Leah grumbled. ‘Not that anyone else cared about that.’
‘Seriously, though.’ Maggie looked at me. ‘She didn’t get to do all this, back then. If you need a reason to go to the prom, and dress up, and do it all over again, do it for Auden. She missed it the first time around.’
Leah glanced at me, then back at her reflection. ‘I don’t know,’ she said. ‘It’s a lot to ask.’
‘So what,’ Esther said, bouncing up and down, her crinoline rustling. ‘It gives you an excuse to go to Tallyho.’
‘True,’ Leah agreed.
‘You don’t have to, you know,’ I said to Maggie, who was watching me as I pulled on another dress. ‘I’ve got Jason to go with. I’ll be fine.’
‘No way,’ she replied. ‘For the true prom experience, you need your friends there.’
‘Because who else but your friends,’ Esther said, ‘would agree to help you re-create your past, just to fix some wrong that’s been niggling you ever since?’
‘Nobody,’ Leah said.
‘Nobody,’ Maggie repeated.
They were all looking at me. ‘Nobody,’ I said, although I could think of one other answer besides this one, even if I couldn’t say it out loud.
Even with my affirmation, though, they continued to stare at me, to the point that I started to wonder if I had ink on my face, or my underwear was showing. I was just about to do a panicked mirror check when Maggie said, ‘Wow. Auden. That’s the one.’
‘The what?’ I said.
‘Your dress,’ Esther said, nodding at me. ‘It looks amazing.’
I looked down at the purple dress I’d pulled on moments earlier, which I hadn’t even really looked at that closely, yanking it from the closet only because it was not red or black or white, like everything else I’d tried on. Now, though, as I stepped in front of the mirror, I saw that it did fit me pretty well. The neckline was flattering, the skirt full, and I liked how it brought out my eyes. It wasn’t a dress to stop traffic, but maybe I didn’t need that anyway.
‘Really?’ I said.
‘Definitely.’ Maggie came over to stand beside me, reaching out a hand to touch the skirt. ‘Don’t you like it?’
I studied my reflection. I’d never been one for dresses or bold colors, and had never owned anything that shade of purple before in my life. I looked like a different girl. But maybe that was the point. And like having the right snacks, for a true adventure, the proper attire is everything.
‘Yeah,’ I said, reaching down with my fingers to pull the skirt to one side. When I dropped it, it swished back, rearranging itself, as if it already knew where it belonged. ‘It’s perfect.’
Chapter SEVENTEEN
The morning of the Beach Bash, I woke at eight A.M. to the sound of Isby crying through our shared wall. I rolled over, burying my head in the pillow, and waited for Heidi to come and quiet her down. A few minutes later, the crying turned to sobbing, and I began to wonder what was going on. When she started to all-out scream, I went to investigate.
I found her on her back in her crib, red faced, hair matted down with sweat. When she saw me lean over her, she yelled louder, waving her arms madly in front of her face. When I picked her up, cradling her against me, she quieted down, emitting only a bunch of little gasps, like hiccups.
‘You’re okay,’ I told her, jiggling her slightly as I stuck my head out in the hallway. No sign yet of Heidi, which was sort of worrisome, so I went back in and changed the baby’s diaper, which cheered her up considerably. Then I swaddled her up and headed downstairs, where I came upon Heidi sitting at the kitchen table, boxes of prom favors stacked all around her, the phone to her ear.
‘Yes, Robert, I understand your predicament,’ she was saying as she fiddled with a coffee mug in front of her. ‘But the truth is I was counting on you, and I don’t know if I can find someone else on such short notice.’
I could hear my dad’s voice, distant, replying to this through the receiver. It made me realize how long it had been since I’d spoken to him: a week, maybe even two. He’d finally got the message of my not replying to his messages, though. My voice mail had been empty for a while now.