His easy, teasing response caught her off guard, so much so that she actually forgot to be embarrassed. “Really? Other people have come onto your tour bus to—” Ah, there was the mortification flooding back in. Seriously, if the earth could just open up to swallow her whole...
She licked her lips nervously, and his gaze fell heavily to them before he grinned even wider and said, “No. You’re the first.”
How was it that she was on the verge of grinning back at him after what had just happened?
But she already knew the answer: Drew owned his sexuality so well that he seemed to assume she would own hers, too.
Now that was quite a thought, one she’d been circling more and more during the time she’d been with him. Why did she always feel like she needed to run from something that she knew was perfectly natural? And what would happen if she simply embraced it instead?
But she still couldn’t forget the hurt from Drew’s rejection on the beach, when she’d asked him to be with her. As the remembered pain whiplashed her so hard that she swore she could feel the sting of it, she said, “You probably need to get back to the set, or they’re going to think something happened to you.”
“Something did happen to me. Something amazing.”
She wanted to believe that what had happened meant as much to him as it had to her, but it was scary to let herself go there. So scary that she knew she couldn’t be anything but honest. “I can’t do this again, Drew. It hurt so much when you told me you didn’t want to be with me out on the beach. But now...” She bit her lip. “Now it would crush me to hear you say it.”
“Ash.” He reached for her hand and tugged her closer. “That night, it nearly killed me to walk away from you. And now—” His phone rang with James’s special ring tone. “Damn it, can’t I just have five minutes alone with you?”
“As soon as James sees me, he’s going to know. They all will.”
She might admire those women in the audience every night who owned their sexuality, but who was she kidding? She wasn’t one of them. Slipping her hand from Drew’s, she turned to look for the shoe that had fallen off the side of the bunk.
“Ash.” Drew’s voice was so full of warmth that she had to turn back to face him. “What just happened was beautiful. The most beautiful thing I’ve ever been a part of.” She felt herself flush all over again as he continued. “I have to get back to the shoot now, but we need to talk tonight. As soon as I can get away from everything.”
She took a deep breath, trying to get her brain to work right in the aftermath of her shockingly good orgasm. But she already knew he was right, even without her synapses firing. There was no way to hide from what was happening between them anymore. Not now that they’d both just watched each other break apart into a million perfect pieces.
And when James called her phone, she knew Drew’s bodyguard was about to storm onto the bus to lay into his rock-star boss for skipping out in the middle of his photo shoot. “Okay, we’ll talk tonight. You need to go, though. This shoot must be costing a fortune.”
“Do you want to come back with me to the set?”
For a moment she was tempted to hide out on the bus. But that’s just what it would be—hiding. And, suddenly, she was sick of hiding. Sick of sitting on the sidelines of life. No, she wasn’t yet ready to propose a fling again the way she had in Los Angeles, no matter how many sweet and sexy things he’d said to her since then. But just because she was still trying to figure things out, didn’t mean she wanted to figure them out in the shadows. Not when it seemed she’d been doing that her entire life.
“I like having you there,” he added when she didn’t answer quickly enough. “But I know you’re probably bored senseless.”
“I wasn’t bored.” Which was an understatement, given the fact that she’d been riveted by every flex of his abs, the slight sheen of sweat that had begun to cover his tanned skin under the hot lights, and how funny and clever he was as he joked with the photographer’s staff. “I like being there, too.”
He reached for her hand, and it felt more electric than ever. “And then after, we’ll talk. Tonight.”
She couldn’t look away from his beautiful eyes as she echoed, “Tonight.”
Chapter Eighteen
Ashley was on pins and needles as We’ll talk tonight played over and over in her head like a song on repeat. She didn’t want to make the mistake of getting her hopes up again and letting anticipation take over, but every time she thought about what had happened on the bus that afternoon...