He didn’t even want to think about what Ricky had said. More importantly, he didn’t want to think about the fact that he had left Ricky with his legs still intact. He should’ve pulverized the bastard right then and there. As he ate, he studied Ethan momentarily and then followed up with a question of his own. “Has he said that to you before?”
“To me? No. Around me? Yes.” Ethan wasn’t paying attention to much more than the sandwich that was left on his plate. “I’ve heard it numerous times. Mostly when we’re at Moonshiners. The guy doesn’t possess enough balls to say it to my face.”
Beau’s hand instinctively clenched into a fist. He had to put his sandwich down, or he risked squeezing it into a mushy mess. “He’s a bastard,” Beau retorted.
“There’re a lot of those in this town,” Ethan confirmed. “You’ll do yourself a favor if you learn to ignore them. Or better yet, just keep your personal business to yourself.”
Beau wasn’t sure he could do that. For one, he didn’t want to hide who he was. He was at a point in his life when he knew what he wanted. And two, he knew there would be those who would never accept him, but Beau had spent his life around people who did accept him – why would he want to hide from them now?
“Is that why you’re hiding?” he asked, the words blowing out of his mouth like a volcanic eruption that he was unable to stop.
The glare he received from Ethan told him he should’ve kept his mouth shut. Only now the words were out, and he really wanted to know.
“I’m not hiding,” Ethan said, although he didn’t sound convincing.
“No?”
“No. It’s just nobody’s fucking business.”
Beau was tempted to argue, but he knew it was pointless. Not to mention, he wasn’t interested in pissing Ethan off. However, it did seem like that was fairly easy to do. Getting into a pissing match with the man he wanted to spend more time with wasn’t going to benefit either of them, so Beau simply nodded his head, letting the subject drop.
“So, Dillinger’s let you go because they’re slow?” Ethan asked when the silence consumed them long minutes later.
At least the subject had changed, and Ethan didn’t sound like he was ready to strangle him.
“That’s what Ralph says. Now I’m starting to wonder.”
Beau remembered Ricky’s statement from yesterday:
Told you he was a queer, Ralph.
At the time, Beau got the impression Ricky had been talking about him, not Ethan.
“Wonder about what?” Ethan looked up. “It’s not like they know you’re gay.”
Beau picked his sandwich up, then put it back down. Part of him agreed with Ethan because he wasn’t sure how anyone would know. Well, no one other than Zane and V. And now Ethan. And maybe Blake. “How do you figure that?”
“Never mind.”
“No. Answer me.”
Ethan peered up at him, his eyes wide as though he couldn’t believe Beau had the nerve to talk to him that way.
Well, the man would have to learn soon enough… Beau wasn’t the submissive type. And he hoped he was going to get to prove to Ethan just how un-submissive he really was.
Chapter Fourteen
Whether it was because of the conversation or because of his nerves from sitting this close to Beau, but Ethan’s appetite had diminished rapidly. Pushing his plate and the last untouched sandwich sitting on it away, he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest.
Beau had insisted that he follow up on his statement. Part of him wished he hadn’t said a word. The other part wanted to get this out in the open. And he’d be the first to admit that Beau’s snide remark had rubbed him the wrong way, putting him on the defensive.
“Fine. So, tell me this… how is it that you spent the majority of your life not knowing you were gay?”
Ok, so that definitely didn’t come out sounding the way he had hoped. Obviously, by the frown on Beau’s face, he had taken it exactly how it sounded.
“Sorry,” Ethan began, but Beau instantly cut him off.
“No, don’t apologize,” Beau said with a hint of frustration in his voice. “I’m curious how all of a sudden you think you know me.”
Ethan stared intently at Beau, unsure what to say next. He’d already inserted his size fourteen boot right into his mouth, and he didn’t trust himself not to do it again. And Beau was right. Technically, Ethan didn’t know him. However, he did know Beau’s history.
“I’ve heard my fair share of stories about you and my brother.”