Luke’s face is tense and motionless. I don’t dare say a word.
Then abruptly he stands up. “We can’t sit here all day. I’ll go and see him. If I have to do the job I have to do the job.” He gives me a look. “I just hope the handbag was worth it, Becky. I really hope it was worth it.”
I feel a sudden stab of pain.
“Luke, I’m sorry,” I say. “I’m really sorry. I never meant… I never realized—”
“Yeah, Becky,” he interrupts in weary tones. “Whatever.”
He leaves the room, followed by Gary. And I just sit there. Suddenly there’s a tear rolling down my cheek. Everything was so perfect. And now it’s all ruined.
Sixteen
THIS HAS BEEN the worst week of our entire marriage.
I’ve barely seen Luke, he’s been so tied up with work. He’s had meetings every day with the Arcodas Group, plus there’s been a huge crisis with one of his banking clients, and one of his main account managers was rushed to the hospital with meningitis. It’s all been total mayhem.
And today, instead of having a chance to relax and regroup, he’s got to fly out to Cyprus to visit Nathan Temple’s hotel and start planning the launch. A launch which he doesn’t want to do, but has to — because if he pulls out with some excuse, Nathan Temple might get offended. According to all the business press, it’s looking likely that Nathan Temple’s going to buy the Daily World newspaper. So as Luke said, he can’t afford to antagonize him.
“Can I do anything?” I say nervously as I watch him put shirts into a suitcase.
“No,” he says shortly. “Thanks.”
This is how he’s been all week. All quiet and scary and barely looking me in the eye. And when he does look me in the eye, he looks so fed up that I feel a bit sick.
I’m trying really hard to keep positive and look on the bright side. I mean, it’s probably totally normal for couples to have blips like this. Just like Mum said. This is the Second Big Row of our marriage, and the air will clear again and everything will be fine… Except I’m not sure the Second Big Row should come two days after the First Big Row. And I’m not sure it should last a whole week.
I tried e-mailing Mum on her cruise ship to ask her advice, but I got a message back saying that the Mind Body Spirit cruise was a retreat from the outside world, and no passengers could be contacted until next Friday, when they dock in Athens.
Luke zips up his suit carrier and disappears into the bathroom without even looking at me. He’ll be gone in a few minutes. We can’t leave each other like this. We just can’t.
He comes out again and dumps his shaving kit in his suitcase.
“It’s our first anniversary soon, you know.” I’d been hoping Luke and I could do something romantic, like a candlelight picnic. “We should… plan something.”
“I’m not even sure if I’ll be back in time,” says Luke.
He sounds like he doesn’t care, either. Our first anniversary and he’s not even interested. Suddenly my head is hot and I can feel tears pushing at my eyes. The whole week has been awful and now Luke’s leaving and he won’t even smile at me.
“You don’t have to be so unfriendly, Luke,” I say in a rush. “I know I’ve made a mess, but I didn’t mean to. I’ve said I’m sorry about a zillion times.”
“I know,” says Luke in the same old weary tones.
“What do you expect me to do?”
“What do you expect me to do, Becky?” he retorts in sudden exasperation. “Say it doesn’t matter? Say I don’t mind that just when I should be putting all my efforts into the Arcodas Group, I find myself flying off to some godforsaken island?” He clicks his case shut. “You want me to say I’m happy to be associated with some tacky hotel?”
“It won’t be tacky!” I exclaim in dismay. “I’m sure it won’t! Nathan Temple said it was going to be of the highest quality! You should have seen him in that shop in Milan, Luke. He would only accept the best! The best leather… the best cashmere…”
“And I’m sure he’ll have the best water beds,” Luke says with a sarcastic edge to his voice. “Becky, don’t you understand? I have a few principles.”
“So do I!” I say in shock. “I have principles! But that doesn’t make me a snob!”
“I am not a snob,” retorts Luke tightly. “I simply have standards.”
“You are a snob!” My voice rushes out before I can stop it. “Just because he used to run motels! I’ve been looking up Nathan Temple on the Internet. He does loads for charity, he helps people… ”