“You deserve some peace and I need to be responsible for the part I’ve played in making it so hard for you to recognize true and honest to God love when it’s staring you in the face.”
“I need to go.” I pushed away from the table and looked down at her. I was grateful she didn’t get to her feet and try and hug me because I was nowhere near ready for that but when she offered me up a small smile I didn’t hesitate to grin back at her.
“Thanks mom.”
“You should have great things Rule, including a happy and whole family.”
“One step at a time mom.”
I was walking out of the shop when I almost plowed over the tiny brunette that had been checking me out the last time I was here. I grabbed her upper arms to steady her and let her go so I could move past her. What I needed to do, who I needed to get to was suddenly so clear it was the light at the end of the tunnel and I knew, just knew that if I could make it right the darkness wouldn’t pull me under anymore.
“Sorry.” I was going to move around her but she counteracted my move and put herself back squarely in my path. I frowned down at her while she batted long eyelashes up at me.
“No girlfriend this time, isn’t that just a shame?” I recoiled because this is what was out there, girls that would flirt with me, girls that would go home with me knowing I was seeing someone. It wasn’t enough anymore. I deserved better.
“I’m actually on my way to go get her now.”
The brunette tried to pout prettily but it did nothing for me.
“I would never have guessed you and Shaw would end up as a thing. She’s been frigid since high school and I thought she was in love with your brother. Doesn’t it freak you out being a replacement?”
Normally something like that would have made me see red, would have made my damn head explode but I got it now, this girl was nothing, her opinion didn’t matter and her misinformation was just laughable. I was done letting anyone, including a clueless stranger use Remy as a weapon against me.
“I gotta run. Next time I’ll be sure to go in the opposite direction if I see you coming.” She gasped in outrage but I didn’t care I was too busy sliding around her and sending a text to Cora to find out if Shaw was still hanging around her house. I wasn’t guaranteed an answer back because the girls had bonded and Cora was all for me staying the hell away from Shaw but maybe because it was my birthday she shot back that Shaw and Ayden had both worked a day shift today so they should be at the house. I would prefer to say what I had to say to Shaw without an audience considering Ayden wasn’t exactly my biggest fan right now. I was however willing to pick her up and move her out of my way if she didn’t let me get to my girl.
It was late afternoon by the time I got back to the city. I was glad I had taken the day off considering all the unexpected and life changing revelations I had been fielding all day. I was supposed to meet up with the guys for dinner and then I was having a pseudo party at Cerberus. Jet’s band was playing and all my friend’s and some of my regular clients were swinging by for a drink or two. It was lame that Rome was already gone, but we had grown so much closer while he was here I told him repeatedly I would just drink his share as well as my own so that he could be here in spirit still. All I knew was that it wouldn’t be any kind of celebration until I got to Shaw and told her what I had to say.
When I got to Cora’s house my nerves started to act up. If this was the last chance I had to make this work, if she still sent me on my way I wasn’t sure how I would handle it. There was a good chance that Shaw was going to break my heart and that was big and scary because I didn’t even know I had a heart to break before she came along. I skirted past a brand spanking new Porsche SUV and was relieved to see that Ayden’s Jeep was nowhere in sight. I could hear music coming from inside the house. She was listening to The Heartless Bastards and the sentiment made me chuckle as I rang the doorbell. I had to wait a good five minutes before the music went down and I saw the blinds next to the door twitch. I was proud of her for not just opening it without checking to see who it was, but my nerves ratcheted up even higher when after seeing that it was me she took another few minutes to pull the door open.
When she did I stopped breathing and forgot everything I wanted to say. She was obviously on her way out somewhere. She had on a super tight, super short black dress that made the green in her eyes electric and the pale blond of her hair glow around her head like a halo. I obviously interrupted her because she was bare foot and didn’t have any makeup but had her hair all curled up in a complicated style. She still looked so perfect it was enough to make my eyes hurt. The idea that she might be going on a date with someone else immediately crashed into all my hard won resolve and made my back teeth snap together.
“Hey.” It wasn’t eloquent or romantic but I was having a hard time not over thinking this and she didn’t seem to mind. She shivered in her almost nonexistent outfit and took a step away from the door.
“Come in. It’s cold out.”
I followed her into the house and was relieved when she went into the kitchen and pulled out a beer for me. It gave me something to do with my hands and a minute to get my head together.
“It’s not much of a present but it’s the best I can do on short notice. Happy birthday Rule.”
“Thanks, are you uhh headed out somewhere?” I let my hungry gaze travel from the top of her shiny head to the tips of her bright red painted toes; she was working towards being all healed up and looked like everything I ever wanted with a few bruises and bumps thrown in to remind me how close I had come to losing her all together. “You look very nice.”
She grinned sheepishly and twirled the ends of her hair around her finger. “I was getting ready to go out later.”
“Oh well I won’t take up too much of your time then. I just wanted to talk to you real quick.”
She leaned up against the kitchen counter while I took a seat at one of the kitchen table chairs.
“Ayden forgot about something she had to do for her I-Chem class so she won’t be back for a couple hours and Cora doesn’t get off until seven. We’re going to dinner.”
I was so happy to hear that she didn’t have a date with another guy that I let out an audible sigh that had her raising a pale eyebrow at me.
“What did you want to talk to me about Rule? It’s nice to see you and all but I have to say I’m kinda surprised you’re here.”