After a few minutes of silence, Ellie asked, “Why didn’t you tell me that you took care of my apartment? You lied to me when you told me it was already rented.”
He told her the truth because she deserved it. “I wanted your place to be waiting for you. I wanted your life to be as normal as possible when you got back. I didn’t know I’d find you nearly dead. When you started refusing to come home to recover with me, I gave up your place so you had to be with me. I know it was a shitty thing to do, and I’m sorry I lied. But I’m not sorry that you’re with me where you belong. Right now, I need you to be with me as much as you need someone to be with you so you’re safe and not alone.” Christ! He was downright desperate to watch her every single moment.
“Why?”
“Because I need the reassurance that you’re fucking really alive and getting better,” he told her reluctantly. “This whole thing—your disappearance, the long search, the endless days of wondering where you were and what the hell had happened to you, wondering if you were dead or alive—it all scared the hell out of me, and even though I know you’re alive, the fear hasn’t gone away.” Zane was starting to wonder whether it ever would.
She was quiet for a moment before she finally answered, “I think you’re right. I think right now I do need to be with you. Tonight proved that to me. Until I can conquer all my demons, I need you to slay them for me. I know what you did was out of fear, and Lord knows I understand that. But please don’t ever lie to me, or try to manipulate me again.”
That moment was pivotal for Zane. It was the instant that he knew that he was utterly and completely screwed. “I won’t.” He cared about her way too much not to try to keep that promise.
The holidays flew by, and after a few months, she and Zane fell into a routine. He’d work in his lab during the day, but he’d show up by dinnertime. She cooked, and had slowly organized his entire house except for his lab.
Zane couldn’t find anything, which she found pretty amusing. Not that he’d been very good at finding things before she’d organized, but when she was done, he was completely lost.
Ellie slowly started working on her aromatherapy business again, making candles and scents that made her happy. Her Internet sales weren’t miraculous, but it was enough to pay for her hobby with a little left over.
Eventually, she’d gotten used to driving the BMW Zane had gifted to her, even though she thought it was ridiculous for a woman like her to be driving any kind of luxury vehicle. Slowly, she’d desensitized herself, feeling less and less afraid to be out and about, even when Zane wasn’t around. With Dr. Townson’s help, she was inching closer to a normal life, but she knew it was going to be a while before she was completely recovered…if she ever did.
Her body was filling out, and she’d already had to go buy a few new clothes. Hopefully, she’d reach a point where she didn’t feel like she was starving all the time. Unfortunately, she hadn’t gotten to that particular stage yet. Having been deprived of food for so long, Ellie acknowledged unhappily that she was making up for lost meals.
Maybe that was why she was currently munching on an enormous plate of nachos at two a.m. Having been awakened by a nightmare, one of many of the side effects of her traumatic experience, she hadn’t been able to go back to sleep. She’d gotten up and turned on all the lights to chase away the shadows once she reached the kitchen, not wanting to disturb Zane with her insomnia by turning on lights in the hallway. Then, she’d promptly went to work on making an enormous batch of nachos. No doubt she’d pay for it with heartburn later, but she’d topped them off with a very liberal amount of jalapenos and salsa.
Now, she was at the other end of the enormous house, kicking back in the family room, eating nachos and focused on one of her favorite crime shows. Lucky for her, Zane had on-demand television, so whenever she had a chance, she caught up on her forensic true crime stories.
“It’s not the husband,” she said to the television irritably as she watched the police go down the wrong trail to find a woman’s murderer. “There’s no motive, no life insurance, and his grief wasn’t fake,” Ellie concluded, shoving more nachos into her mouth.
“What the hell are you doing?” A loud baritone boomed over the sound of the television.
Ellie squealed, almost upsetting the bowl of nachos on her lap as she turned to look at Zane. “Oh, God. I’m so sorry. I didn’t think you’d be able to hear the TV.”
Frantically, she glanced around for the controller so she could turn the show off. She couldn’t find it. Setting the bowl down on the table in front of the couch, Ellie started feeling down the cracks in the couch.
“Ellie…stop,” Zane grumbled, grabbing her by the shoulders. “You didn’t wake me, and the TV didn’t bother me. I woke up on my own and went to the kitchen for something to drink. I just wondered what the hell you were doing up. You went to bed early.”
She breathed a sigh of relief as she looked up at him, her heart skipping a beat as she met his confused gaze. “I had a bad dream. I couldn’t go back to sleep. It happens sometimes, and I know I’m not going to get back to sleep quickly, so I just get up and watch some TV.”
He nodded as if he understood and then plopped down on the couch, snatched her nachos, and pulled her back down beside him. “What are we watching?”
Ellie loved the way that Zane just accepted whatever she was doing as normal and joined her in her insanity.