On his walk home, he saw a familiar dirty lump resting at the mouth of an alley. Yet another thing that hadn’t changed. He veered toward it, a smile lighting his face. “Hello, Rex. Nice to see you again.”
The bearded man looked up, squinting. “Hey, it’s the Loch Ness Monster. How are ya, man?”
I’m lost and miserable and I fucked up the best thing in my life. “Managing. Want to grab lunch?” Loch could use the company.
“The regular spot? Don’t mind if I do.” He got to his feet and dusted off his layers of clothing. “Lead the way, my friend.”
The diner was fairly empty and as they went to the counter, Loch saw a woman giving them a revolted look as Rex set his plastic bag of belongings down on the stool next to him. He felt a surge of protectiveness for his odd friend. Rex deserved to have lunch just like everyone else. Loch clapped him on the back and gave him a half-armed hug, trying to show his approval to the world—or at the very least, the rest of the diners. “I’m glad to see you again.”
Rex grunted. “You, too. Been a few weeks. Business trip?”
Loch sat down and pulled out the menu, studying it for something less noxious than the hamburger he normally ordered. A grilled cheese looked promising. Surely they couldn’t mess up a grilled cheese, could they? “Actually, I went home.”
“Back home to Switzerland? Belarus? What was that place called?”
“Bellissime.”
“Right.” He peered at Loch. “So if you went home, how come you came back?”
Loch was silent, mentally trying to parse out how much to talk about. He wanted to pour out all his feelings for Taylor, the despair he felt knowing he’d lost her, but he wasn’t sure how Rex would take it. So he said nothing. The waitress came over to them and they ordered food. He turned back to Rex once both orders were in and two glasses of soda were set down in front of them. “I came back because I went home and it wasn’t the same.”
“You got bored?” Rex guessed.
“I did.” He smiled ruefully. “The bubble I was living in? I think it burst.”
“Can’t say that’s a bad thing. Sometimes getting out of your comfort zone is good.”
“It is,” Loch agreed. The conversation felt woefully . . . inadequate. Like he was skirting around the real issue. He decided to take a chance. “The real reason I came back . . . the girl I mentioned? I messed it up. I came back because I wanted to make it right with her.”
Rex pocketed a stack of napkins. “You didn’t tell her the truth, did you?”
“Nope.” He felt sick, and the smell of greasy food just made it worse.
“Thought you could get away with it?”
“Yeah. I was pretty wrong about that, it seems.” Loch sighed and took a sip of his drink. “Wrong about a lot of things. I didn’t realize how much she meant to me until I lost her.”
“Happens that way with a lot of women.”
That didn’t make him feel better. “I need her back. I’m nothing without her.”
“Nice words, but I imagine she’ll have a say in the matter.”
She would. He thought of Taylor’s hurt, angry face, the tears she’d wept when she’d realized he was using her. His stomach knotted all over again. “I imagine she will. But if I can fix it, I want to give it a try. I want to fix what I broke with her. And I want to fix what’s wrong with me. I’m tired of being dependent on everyone else. I’m going to stand on my own two feet for a while. Get a house, figure out what I want to do with my life, the works.”
Rex nodded slowly. “I’m proud of you. Takes balls to admit when you’re wrong.”
Strangely enough, Rex’s praise felt good. “Thanks. I want to help you, too.”
“Oh?” The man’s tone became distant, wary.
“Not charity,” Loch said quickly. “I want to help you get on your feet because you’ve been a good friend to me and I’d do that for any of my friends. I don’t want anything out of it other than to help you. Tell me what you need.”
Rex grunted and took a long drink of his soda, emptying the glass down to the ice. He shook it at the waitress, then looked over at Loch. “I don’t need anything other than a friend, Loch Ness. I’m not into handouts.”
“Really? Because you take my handouts every time I come by.”
Rex snorted with laughter. “Turning the tables on me? I like it! All right. Fair enough. Maybe it’s not the handouts as much as I don’t like being beholden to anyone. You know the feeling.”
“I do. Very much so.” Loch rubbed his chin, thinking. “What do you like to do? For a living?”
“Why? You offering me a job? You don’t even have one.”
“Humor me.”
Rex was silent for a long moment, then glanced over at Loch. “Grew up on a farm. I like horses. Cattle. Things like that. Working with my hands.” His smile grew thin. “Good luck finding me that here in the city.”
“Actually . . .” Loch grinned and clapped a hand on Rex’s back. “Did I mention I’m purchasing a house here? And probably a few horses? I could use a man to look after my stables once I get settled.”
Rex’s bushy brows drew together. He scratched at his beard. “Why are you so fired up to hire a fuckin’ hobo? For all you know, I murdered someone and got out of prison and that’s why I’m on the street.”
“Did you?”