“Babe,” he said, cupping my face, his thumb sliding across the curve of my cheek. “What’s going on?”
Two choices loomed in front of me. I could continue to keep Ren in the dark about what I was and hope for the best. Pray that Kyle wouldn’t figure out it was me, and that somehow we’d be able to deal with the prince and the ancients without me getting outed in the process. But I knew as I stared into his eyes, that was a lot of foolish hoping and praying—a dangerous level of it.
Telling him the truth, which was my only other choice, was so incredibly risky. I loved him. I was in love with him, and maybe that made me a little blind, but because I loved him, I couldn’t do that to him. I couldn’t allow him to find out through Kyle or other members of the Elite. I didn’t know what would happen if I did tell him, and I fully recognized that I would virtually be handing him a loaded gun. I had no idea what he’d do, but I knew if I spoke those words, it was over between us.
And I couldn’t ask him not to do his duty. He would be required to turn me over to the Order, or worse, to take me out himself. I knew I couldn’t let him do the latter. I was too much of a fighter for that. I knew myself. I would fight anyone who came for me even if I understood why I’d be turned in.
“You’re really starting to scare me, Ivy.” His eyes searched mine. “For real.”
The sound of traffic and the hum of conversation faded into the distance as I took a deep breath. I had to tell him. He had to know, because I wouldn’t let him be blindsided again. I couldn’t lie to him anymore.
My breath lodged in my throat. I had to do the right thing.
Chapter Twelve
My heart felt like it was about to stop in my chest. “I’m the—”
“Hey, what are you two doing down here?” a voice called from the mouth of the alley, halting me. I jerked back, and my heart nearly fell out of my chest when I saw Henry standing several feet away.
Holy crap on a buttered cracker, I’d almost admitted to being the halfling in front of Henry—an Elite member.
“Well, nothing like explaining the obvious,” Ren said. “We’re talking. You know, something two people, sometimes more, or hell, even when a person is alone, like to do without interruption.”
I gave Ren a long side-look.
Henry strode down the alley, the color of his cheeks starting to match his hair. “Kyle warned that you were a smartass. I see he wasn’t exaggerating.”
Ren smirked. “What’s up?”
“Kyle needs to speak with you.” Henry glanced in my direction, and apparently decided I was not worthy of being a part of the conversation, because he refocused on Ren. My brows rose.
“Kind of doing something right now.” Ren folded his arms. “I’ll be up to see Kyle when I—”
“It’s an order.” Henry cut him off, mirroring Ren’s stance by folding his arms. “So whatever you’re doing right now is going to have to wait.”
For a moment I thought Ren was going to continue being a smartass. The hard set of his jawline told me there was a really good chance of that happening. I also recognized that certain gleam in his eyes. Time to step in. “I can wait,” I told him, touching his arm. “Go see what Kyle needs.”
“Hell,” Ren muttered under his breath, and I knew talking to Kyle was the last thing he wanted to do. “We’ll continue this later. Okay?”
I nodded, dropping my arm.
“Times a-ticking, my man,” Henry commented.
Ren ignored him as he lifted his arm, curling his hand around the back of my neck. He lowered his head as he drew me toward him, and I went, guessing Ren was not going to hide his relationship with me in front of the newcomers. I couldn’t decide if that was a good or bad thing.
He placed his mouth beside my ear and whispered low enough for just me to hear. “You okay?”
I didn’t know what I was at the moment. “I’m fine.”
Ren hesitated for a moment, then pressed his lips to my cheek. I thought that would be it, but then his mouth was on mine, and he kissed me deeply. It was not a chaste or sweet kiss, and I almost forgot that Henry was standing there.
“I think she just got pregnant,” Henry said, clearing his throat.
Ren slowly lifted his head, his eyes locked on mine. “I think you better keep your month shut if you want to use it later for things like breathing and eating.”
My eyes widened. Oh dear.
Whatever Henry replied was lost in another quick kiss, and then the three of us were walking out of the alley. “Text me when you’re done,” I said.
“Will do.”
I looked at Henry, who was studiously acting as if I didn’t exist. “Bye, Henry,” I said.
He grunted.
I rolled my eyes while Ren gave me a half-grin. Wiggling my fingers at him, I pivoted around and started off in the opposite direction from headquarters. I waited until I reached the corner of Royal and then stopped, leaning against the wall.
“Holy shit,” I murmured, bending over as the full reality of what I’d almost done sank in. “Holy shitstorm in the making.”
My stomach roiled. I’d been a hundred percent prepared to tell Ren that I was the halfling, and those words had been right on the tip of my tongue before Henry showed up. I still needed to tell him, but this was like getting a governor’s reprieve seconds before execution.
My face scrunched.
That was a terrible way of looking at it. Okay. That was probably the most realistic way of looking at it, but seriously, it wasn’t helping.