Reeve interrupted, his words softer than I’d heard him use with her since the night she’d arrived. “You didn’t deserve anything, An—” He stopped himself before the nickname crossed his lips completely. “You didn’t deserve it.”
“I disagree, but that’s not what —”
He cut her off again. “No. That’s not acceptable. He’s the lowest of scum, and it doesn’t matter what you said or did —”
She raised her voice to quash his. “The point is that I made a mistake. I was overly confident, and I was stupid to —”
“You weren’t stupid. He’s good at manipulating.”
“He is.” She let a beat pass. “Can I finish?”
“Go ahead.” His voice was tight with reluctance, and I wondered if he was as apprehensive as I was.
Probably not. The interaction was intimate and, not for the first time, I felt like a voyeur. It wasn’t a conversation I was meant to be part of. I debated excusing myself to let them work out their past baggage alone, but I couldn’t move. I was eager for her to clear the air, even if it had nothing to do with me. Whatever she had to say to Reeve, I was interested in hearing it as well.
“I was going to say that I was stupid to leave you.” She took a breath, and I stopped breathing entirely. “I still love you, Reeve, and if you have any room in your heart for forgiveness, I’d really like a second chance.”
Everything around me dimmed, as though a curtain had fallen over my vision. My balance seemed to shift, too, even though I was still sitting, as if my entire world had tilted on its axis.
“I have to go,” I muttered, pushing back my chair and jumping to my feet.
Behind me, I heard the scrape of another chair. “Emily’s right,” Joe said. This is obviously a private conversation. We’ll just let you…”
His voice trailed off as I disappeared into the house. I didn’t stop as I made it through the library and down the hallway, past the main hall. At the front door, I kept going, bounding down the steps two at a time. I followed a trail that led who-knew-where, gulping air, trying to get oxygen into my lungs without much luck.
“Emily!” Joe called after me, his words barely registering over the one thought pulsing with deafening thunder in my head – I knew it. I knew it, I knew it, I knew it.
I didn’t turn back, thinking if I kept going maybe I could outrun the reality we’d both just walked out on.
But he kept following. “Emily, would you please stop?”
I couldn’t stop. My hand clutched at the stitch in my side, and I still couldn’t get a decent breath, but I kept going.
Joe jogged to catch up with me. Then he matched his stride to mine, walking at my side. “Are you okay?”
“Does it look like I’m fucking okay?” I snapped, startling him.
He didn’t respond, walking alongside me quietly for several minutes.
Eventually, the phrase hammering inside slipped past my lips. “I knew it.”
“Knew what?”
“That it was inevitable.” Conversation was difficult with the lack of air, but somehow I managed short phrases. “That it was too good. To be true. I knew it. I knew it.”
“What was too good to be true?” Joe honestly seemed to not be following. “You and Reeve? Please tell me you’re joking.”
I threw him a look that was meant to kill. “You know what? I don’t need your fucking commentary on this.”
“Hey. I’m not…” He grabbed my arm, stopping me. “Hold on, all right? You’re going to pass out if you keep this up.”
I yanked my arm out of his grasp, but I obeyed. He encouraged me to bend over, and I did, placing my hands on my thighs and letting my head fall between my knees as I forced my breaths to slow and even.
“Okay,” he said, his hand patting at the small of my back. “I don’t particularly like the guy. But I respect him. Sort of. If he’s really not into any of the shady dealings he seems connected to, then I definitely respect him. More importantly, I like you. So if this guy is the guy, then…” He couldn’t bring himself to finish that statement. “All right. I won’t go that far.”
I peered up at him. “You suck at this.”
He crouched down so he was at eye level. “Here’s the thing. That guy is into you. If you’re out here upset because you think you’re losing him to your drug-addict friend —”
“That isn’t who she is.”
His features were soft but the look he shot me was skeptical. “You haven’t seen her in a long time – are you sure?”
“Yeah. I’m pretty sure.” I straightened. Now that I’d stopped walking, my body registered the cold, and I wrapped my arms around myself as I considered his question.
The truth was, there were things about Amber I was no longer sure of. But it didn’t really matter. The one thing I did know was enough. “Even if she isn’t,” I said, “if she wants him, I have to step out of the way. That’s all there is to it.”
Joe rose to his full height. “Is this some fucked-up rule between girlfriends?”
“It’s a fucked-up rule between us. I can’t take a man from her. I won’t.” Any other explanation would be a waste of breath, and I still hadn’t quite gotten mine back.
He gave a skeptical shrug. “Seems like she’s the one taking the guy from you considering that you are the one who was here when I brought her back.”