She was lost, over the crest of the hill and there was no turning back. She didn’t want to. Tonight she would let the man of her dreams, Reed Davidoff, make a real woman of her.
Eyes closed tight she waited for him to tug at her dress, pulling the top down that one last inch, exposing her fully to his gaze. She waited. And waited. And then she felt him pull back. Then he was straightening the top of her dress and sliding the spaghetti strap back onto her shoulder.
Her eyes snapped back open. “What’s wrong?” Heart sinking, she searched his face. “Did I...do something wrong?”
He shook his head as he turned away from her. “Not you,” he said. “It’s me. I can’t do this. I don’t want to take advantage of you.”
“But you’re not,” she protested. “I want this, just as much as you do.” She reached out to touch him on the arm. “Please, Reed. Don’t stop now.”
He looked at her then, his eyes flashing with fiery emotion. “I won’t do it, Golden. Not like this.”
She could see that he was resolute. No amount of pleading would make him change his mind. Slowly, she drew her hand away. “Then maybe you’ll do it,” she said softly, “under other circumstances.”
She reached for him again but this time it was to take his hand in hers. “Reed Davidoff, would you do me the honor of being my husband?”
CHAPTER TWENTY
Shock shooting through him, Reed jerked his hand from Golden’s grasp, his jaw slack as he stared at her. “What did you say?” He could only imagine that his ears must be playing tricks on his.
“I just asked you to marry me,” she said and she was staring directly at him, not blinking, looking like she meant it.
“You’re not serious?”
“Of course I’m serious. Why wouldn’t I be? I...” A shadow fell across her face and her confident air suddenly vanished. “I thought you liked me.”
Reed almost groaned. Now how was he to answer that one? Of course he liked her. In fact, what he was feeling for her was a whole lot more than liking. But what good would it do to tell her that? All it would do was hurt her even more.
When he didn’t answer she reached for him again and at the touch of her delicate hand his heart sank, knowing the hurt that was to come.
“You don’t...want to marry me, then?”
Her voice was faint with hopelessness and distress and he felt his heart wrench inside his chest. There was nothing he could do but be honest.
“I can’t,” he said, his voice low and bitter. “I’m already married to someone else.”
***
Golden felt the blood rush from her head. Suddenly she felt faint. Blinking, she put a hand to her forehead and fell back against the couch. She felt like the air had been punched out of her lungs.
She couldn’t move, she couldn’t speak, she could not even breathe. She’d been thrown into a nightmare that was worse than any she could have imagined. The man she loved was already taken. He’d already given his heart to someone else.
And then it hit her. He’d been misleading her the whole time she’d known him. Reed Davidoff had been leading her on.
And in the midst of her devastation, red-hot rage began to rise in her breast. She turned toward him, angry heat blazing in her face. “How could you? You made me think you were interested in me. You made me think you were free.” She dropped her gaze to his left hand. “You’re not even wearing a wedding ring.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“Then what did you mean to do?” she spat and shot up from the seat. She could not bear to sit by him one minute longer. “You kissed me, you made me want you, you made me fall in love-” She broke off, suddenly realizing she was saying too much.
Clenching her fists by her side, her body rigid with rage, she glared down at him. “I hate you, Reed Davidoff. I hope I never set eyes on you again.”
Before the last word left her lips she spun around and flew to the door.
“Golden.”
The sound of Reed’s shout filled her ears but she did not stop. Golden ran, not even stopping to get the elevator. She flew toward the stairs and ran down, down, until she got to her floor.
Finally, weak from shock and weary from her flight, she dragged herself to her door, tears streaming down her cheeks.
Reed Davidoff had hurt her like she’d never been hurt before. She didn’t think she would ever get over it.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Golden didn’t know how she survived the flight back to England in the same plane as Reed, in the same plane as his team. She’d had to pretend that everything was fine, laughing at their jokes, joining in their conversations from time to time. She’d pasted a smile on her face for the entire flight when all she wanted to do was hide herself inside a hole and cry.
When the plane landed in London and their papers had been checked Golden made a quick exit, not wanting to prolong her torture one minute longer than necessary. Reed called after her but she ignored him, sighing with relief only when she was safely ensconced within the four walls of her car.
It was when she was driving home that she gave free flow to her emotions, her shoulders shaking with sobs as she slowly drove home. When the flood of tears threatened to blind her she pulled over to the side of the road, switched off the engine and hugged the steering wheel to her chest. Then she cried like she would never stop.
Thank God when she got home everybody was out. She didn’t have the strength to face anyone right then. She dragged herself up to her room and locked the door, grateful for the solitude and the solace of her bed.
Next day Golden woke at six in the morning as she always did but this time she did not hop out of bed and rush off to prepare for work. For a long time she just lay there staring at the ceiling, wondering if she would ever feel normal again.
Seven o’clock came and she was still lying there. Eight o’clock came and she still hadn’t moved. There were no more tears. She’d shed them all the night before. Now, though, there was a numbness that made her feel like a shell filled with lead.
She jumped when she heard a pounding at her door.