“Kelly,” Kassie repeats, grabbing me by the shoulders, “How. Did you know. About the Devil’s Wraiths?”
The front door crashes open before she can drag an answer out of me, and the men of Dante’s Nine come storming back in. The women gathered at the front window disperse. Dani rushes back to the bar to get the guys some much-needed shots, the trio of club groupies rush to comfort the available members, and Kassie steps to Declan. I alone remain at the window, staring out into the darkness as the Devil’s Wraiths soar off, their headlights fading to pinpoints.
Kassie and Declan trade some quick, hushed words. She’s ready for action, solid as a rock. They really do trust each other, I guess. She’s closer to being an old lady than I realized.
“I’m going to take you home,” Kassie says, returning to my side once more, “We’re going on lockdown for the night.”
“Lockdown?” I ask, “Kassie, what the hell—?”
“I’ll explain on the way,” she says, grabbing my hand and towing me away, “Right now we just have to get out of here.”
We climb into her car and take off toward the strip. No one else seems to be dispersing from the Forty-Five Club, not even the other women. But of course they’re not, that place is their home. It’s only me, the outsider, that needs to be taken away. I’m strangely hurt by this, despite the fact that my rational mind knows I’m not a part of the Dante’s Nine family. They have no responsibility to protect or include me. But still.
“Well?” I say to Kassie as we race along.
“It’s just what I thought,” she sighs, “Things between the Nine and the Wraiths are going sour, fast. Some of our guys have been in contact with other clubs, pressing for intel about the Wraiths. We’ve been distancing ourselves from them, until we figure out what went down with Sam. Apparently, the Wraiths have taken that distance to be a condemnation. They’re saying that we’ve hurt their reputation and spoiled some big business deal they had in the works. It’s bullshit. We’re not middle school girls talking behind their backs, we’re looking for justice for Sam. It’s not our fault their deal fell through.”
“I mean...it kind of is, though,” I say slowly.
“What?” Kassie snaps, her knuckles white on the steering wheel.
“This world is all about pride and respect,” I say, “If the Nine are spreading shit about the Wraiths, then it is their—”
“Nobody is spreading shit!” Kassie exclaims, “My guys would never do something like that, Kelly. And speaking the fuck of, what is your deal with the Wraiths?”
“I don’t have a—”
“Do you honestly think you can lie to me?” Kassie asks, “I know you far too well for that.”
“Guess lies of omission still fly under your radar,” I say softly, staring straight ahead through the windshield.
“I guess they do,” Kassie says, cooling down a degree or two. “Please, Kelly. Tell me the truth. All of it. Your safety here depends on it.”
“You’re going to be pissed.”
“Probably,” she says, “But tell me anyway.”
I draw in a deep breath to begin. Sure, I could make up some bullshit story, here. But Kassie is my best friend, and now my business partner as well. There has to be full disclosure between us, now that we’re orbiting the MC life together.
“You know that I had a rather...chaotic childhood,” I say, not able to look at her. “When I was a kid, I had a cousin who joined up with the Wraiths. My sisters were always inviting his fellow members over for their parties, and I thought they were the shit. I lied about my age to hook up with a few of them, I won’t lie about that. There was a time, before I graduated high school, when I was certain that my best bet in life was to throw myself at the club and see where I stuck.”
“Kelly—” Kassie whispers.
“I had no idea I was book smart, or good at anything,” I shrug, “I’d never touched a computer that was less than ten years old. The MC life was really appealing. I grew up without a dad. Having a whole pack of fierce men, ready to protect me from the world...it’s all I wanted.”
“What changed?” Kassie asks.
“I got into college,” I tell her, “And some part of me knew that I’d regret it for the rest of my life if I didn’t see what I could make of myself. On my own. Without the help of a man. My cousin, Matthew, had all my options lined up with the club. I was going to be some old lady’s house mouse. But at the last second, I turned away. Cut myself off from the MC, entirely. I haven’t even spoken to my cousin since then. I ran away, and I’m glad that I did.”
“Is all of you glad?” Kassie asks softly.
“Yes,” I say, “I’m glad that I got my education. I’m glad that I know how to take care of myself. I’m glad that I can look at everything I have in life and know that I built it. But I’d be lying through my teeth if I told you I don’t wonder about what would have happened, had I chosen the Wraith’s path.”
We drive along in silence for a long moment. Kassie’s face is unreadable, it always is when she’s thinking hard. This is, after all, a girl who knows a thing or two about guarding herself. It hurts, exposing this part of me she didn’t know about. I know everything about this girl, the tragedy of her family, her repressed childhood. Telling her this secret now opens a chasm between us. I just have to hope that our friendship is strong enough to stretch across it.
“Are you loyal to the Devil’s Wraiths, Kelly?” she finally asks. The pain in her voice is deep and vast. In that one question, I can see just how far into the world of Dante’s Nine she’s really descended. These guys mean the world to her. They might even be coming to mean more to her than I do.
“Not at all, Kassie,” I say earnestly, finally turning to face her, “I swear to you, no part of me feels like it belongs to the Wraiths. I love the Nine. I love that you’re Declan’s old lady. If anything, I wish I could be part of the MC with you.”
“This is insane,” she says, shaking her head, “How did I not know this about you? You know every single thing about me—”
“I buried all of that the minute I got to college. As soon as I got out of my hometown, that house, I wanted to be a new person,” I say, “I didn’t want people thinking I was some white trash bimbo. Least of all you.”