Was there any point in continuing this conversation? He wasn’t going to listen to what she was telling him. He’d made up his mind that they’d be together, and he wouldn’t accept anything less than that.
If she had still been angry, this would have been so much easier. She could have ignored him, or charged him with harassment. If she had felt nothing at all toward him, it would have been easier still. She could have pretended he was just a passing stranger — shrugged off the look in his eye, and the allure of his body.
But no, her traitorous heart and hormones had been all aflutter ever since he’d set foot inside her classroom. She wanted him with a desire that ran alongside the blood in her veins, and she still loved him, even after two years of trying to forget him, of trying to despise him.
“Right now, I’m so tired, I can’t process any thoughts at all,” she said, confusion seeming to hold sway among the myriad emotions she was feeling.
“I’m sorry. I know this has all been too much. I shouldn’t push you right now,” Rafe said as he reached out and took her hand, bringing it to his lips and gently kissing it before releasing her fingers.
Ari didn’t know how to respond, didn’t know what to do next. Her brain was too muddled at this point. The best thing would be for her to have a bit of time to rest; then, perhaps, if she woke up refreshed, she would be able to process all that he’d said, and figure out what she wanted to do next.
“I’m going to lie down,” she said. She pushed the rest of her food away, stood up, and walked past him.
When he let her walk by, she was surprised. She’d expected some kind of protest.
As she climbed beneath the covers of his comfortable guest bed, she shivered, the stress from the last week hitting her like a ton of textbooks. Thinking about the possibility of Lia being hurt only added to her body’s tremors.
She was beyond the point of tears, beyond everything as she lay there in pain. It was all too much. When the bed shifted, she tensed, ready to flay Rafe alive.
“I just want to hold you, Ari. I can see that you’re close to falling apart,” Rafe whispered. He cradled her from behind, his hand coming over the top of her waist and pulling her against him.
She remained stiff as she tried to think of a suitably scathing retort. But she was so worn out, the words wouldn’t come.
“I don’t need you to hold me, Rafe. I’m fine.” It would have sounded so much better if her teeth hadn’t been chattering.
“We need each other right now. We can go back to a standoff when this is all over,” he said, his breath rushing along her neck as he spoke. She’d sat there and comforted him when they’d first gotten on the jet and that had played havoc with her body. Allowing him to offer her reassurance and solace in this fashion didn’t seem a particularly good idea.
Ari tried to resist his comforting, but as her body molded itself against his, the shaking stopped, and she began to relax. His hand gently glided along her stomach, making lazy circles on top of her shirt.
She felt warmth spread through her as his touch began to ignite a flame within. She didn’t want that, even if her perfidious body had other ideas.
“Please, please don’t wiggle your behind. I just want to hold you,” he whispered, and she felt his hardness press against her backside.
Somehow, that relaxed her completely and she closed her eyes. It was insane, but she did feel safe in his arms; even though he was the one who’d caused so much of her pain, she still enjoyed the comfort only he seemed able to give.
For now, she couldn’t think about it. For now, she just needed to sleep. When she woke, the day had to be better. It certainly couldn’t get any worse.
Chapter Thirty
Lia
“Do you see that?”
“Yes,” Shane told Lia. Neither of their voices was excited — just accepting.
In the distance, they’d spotted a helicopter. Both of them had known it was only a matter of time before Rafe found them. They were sure there was an army out searching — literally. The two of them could have been missing for a year and Rafe still wouldn’t give up. That was just who he was, and one of the reasons they loved him so much.
“Should we light the fire?” Lia asked with some sadness, a real question in her tone.
Shane looked at Lia with shock. Neither of them was ready to go, but they couldn’t make their family suffer while wondering whether they were alive or dead. Pure passion had its limits.
“I love being here with you, too, Lia, but just because we’re going back to the real world doesn’t mean that anything will change.” He placed his finger beneath her chin and lifted her head so she had no choice but to gaze into his eyes.
“That’s exactly what it means, Shane. We’ve been relying on each other here. We won’t have to do that when we get back to our lives. Reality will set in, and…” She didn’t know how to complete her sentence.
“And I will still want to spend every waking second with you.”
“It’s not that, Shane. You hurt me. Out here, none of that mattered, but even now, as the helicopter draws nearer, it’s jumping to the forefront of my mind,” she said, not wanting to sugarcoat the words. He needed to know how she felt.
“I screwed up, Lia, and it cost me two years’ time of being with you. Hell, I screwed up by resisting you so long before that. I’ll earn your trust again. You’ll see.”
The chopper was now close enough that they heard a faint whirring and thudding in the distance. Shane released her and moved over to their fire pit. Looking back at her for only a second, he lit the dry tinder. It immediately went up in flames and the wood caught fire.
Once the blaze was hot enough, he threw on the greenery, causing a wall of smoke to lift high in the air. The search parties couldn’t miss their signal.
Lia held out her hand as he walked back to her and they faced the chopper in the distance. It didn’t take long for it to make a beeline in their direction.
As the machine approached their island and then began to set down, Lia had to fight tears. It was insane. She didn’t cry. She wasn’t one of those girls who broke down — she was strong and independent. She didn’t need a man to complete her life.
When she wanted something, she wasn’t afraid to take it. Coming from a loving home and having great parents and siblings, she’d learned to be strong and brave, and right now she hated herself just a little bit. She hated that she was surrendering to what she considered the ultimate in weakness.