And because of that, he had to pull out all the stops.
“Before you go to school, got somethin’ I wanna tell you,” he said.
Cleo looked from her cereal bowl to him, attentive as usual.
Zadie looked to him, happily encased in the knowledge things had gone her way.
She grinned and asked, “What, Daddy?”
He stayed where he was and replied, “Worried you’re too young to share this with you. Worried you’re too young to get it. But it’s important enough I gotta give it to you.”
Cleo’s attentive look went guarded.
His baby’s eyes narrowed as the first suspicion she might not have gotten away with being a snot started to hit her.
High ignored that and kept talking, hoping the way he was going to share what he had to share would hit somewhere in Zadie she understood.
“Long time ago, I walked into a party and saw the prettiest girl I’d ever seen. Fell in love with her right then and there. Fell in love the minute I locked eyes on her.” He looked between his girls and went on, “Millie did the same.”
Zadie’s mouth got hard.
Cleo stared at her dad.
“For three years we lived happily,” High told them, and looked to Zadie. “But we didn’t live happily ever after.”
When he said no more, Cleo asked quietly, “What happened, Daddy?”
High turned his eyes to his eldest. “We both wanted a family. We both wanted kids real bad. Knew it before I had it with you two that you were the only things I wanted on this earth. My own babies. Kids I could love and help to grow up strong and good. Millie wanted that too. We talked about it all the time. Had names picked out and everything. Out of the blue, she split with me and it was over.”
“That wasn’t very nice,” Zadie snapped.
“It was,” High disagreed. “It was the most generous gift anyone could give seein’ as she found out she couldn’t have babies and she made it so I could go on in my life and have you.”
Zadie blinked.
Cleo’s mouth fell open.
“Best Millie can do is have cats,” High told his girls. “She wanted more. A lot more. We were gonna have tons of kids. Four. Five. Boys. Girls. We didn’t care. Now all she’s gonna have is cats.”
Cleo’s lower lip started trembling so she bit it.
Zadie looked down at the table.
“She makes me happy,” he said gently. “I know she’s just come in to your life but she’s been a part of mine for a long time so I’m gonna share with you that I love her and she makes me happy. I wanna make her happy. And it’d mean a lot if you helped me with that.”
Zadie’s eyes cut to him and declared nastily, “Mom’s our mom.”
“Not sayin’ that she isn’t, Zade,” he told her, expending the effort not to get pissed that nothing but what she wanted was sinking in. “Your mom will always be your mom. She’s not out of the equation. I’m just adding Millie to it. Everyone’s got an endless capacity for love. Which means everyone’s got the shot at receiving an endless supply of love. Don’t matter who you give it to or get it from. Just matters you got a heart big enough to give it and a heart open enough to get it back. I can promise you, Millie’s got that kind of love to give.” He shrugged. “Up to you whether you open yourself up to receive it.” He focused closely on Zadie. “I’ll just say, your old man will be disappointed if you decide not to do that.”
“I like her,” Cleo piped up, and High saw his youngest aim an irritated frown at her sister before he looked to his big girl.
“I’m glad, baby,” he said quietly.
Zadie didn’t say anything, so Cleo looked to her sister.
“Zade?” she pushed.
Zadie hopped from her knees in the seat and grabbed her bowl, muttering, “We’re gonna be late for school.”
She didn’t give a shit about school.
She wanted this conversation to be over.
She took her bowl to the sink.
“Rinse that and put it in the dishwasher,” he ordered.
“Whatever,” she mumbled, dumping the milk in the sink.
“Look at me, Zade,” High demanded.
She gave him a squinty look that told him she had things to do and he was wasting her time.
“First, wipe that look off your face,” he said. She didn’t, so he went on, “Now.”
She huffed and changed her look to a bored one.
High let that slide.
“Your old man loves you,” he told her.
She changed her look to a disbelieving one even though she knew deep down that was not right.
He let that slide too.
“Measure of the love you got for me how you decide to give it back,” he said.
“Measure of the love you got for me you got rid of Mom and found some other woman,” she returned.
He stared straight into her eyes and whispered, “Ouch.”
That got her.
She flinched.
But she didn’t say anything.
“Honest to God, you okay with layin’ that kinda hurt on your old man?”
She stared at him a beat before she turned to the dishwasher, opened it, and shoved her bowl in.
“Now more hurt, you not answerin’, which means you obviously are,” he noted.
She looked back at him. “Just because I don’t like your girlfriend doesn’t mean I don’t love you, Daddy.”
“Hit me, darlin’. Lay it out straight. You won’t get into trouble,” he told her. “Tell me, what did Millie do to make you not like her?”