“Slow down, Kendall, wait for me.” Evan caught up to her, his shirt in his hand. “Hey, talk to me.”
She sighed. “Is there anything to talk about?”
“Uh, yeah. Like the fact that we just agreed we’re going to spend time together and yet you’re running away from me.”
“I’m not running away from you. I’m thinking. Thinking that this is a sucky position to be in.” Kendall paused in her striding across the field to look at him. “I feel like I’m being forced to make a choice and I don’t like it.”
“You don’t have to make a choice.” Evan reached out and rubbed her forearms up and down gently, his brown eyes serious and compassionate. “We can do this on the down low. We can still see each other but not make a big deal out of it. We’ll redo the stupid commercial. It will all be fine.”
“This feels complicated, not fine.”
“It’s only as complicated as you make it.”
Was he right? She didn’t know. Feeling torn and dissatisfied, Kendall glanced over at the old barn tenaciously clinging to existence at the back of the field. “I wonder what it looks like in that barn.”
“Dirty.”
“Let’s check it out.” Kendall started walking towards it.
Evan pulled his shirt on. “We used to go drink beer inside it when we were in high school. What’s really cool is there’s a little tiny lake hiding behind it.”
“Yeah? It must be really hidden.”
“It is. The perfect place to make out.”
He tried to take her hand, but Kendall evaded his touch. She was too keyed up, too worried. Besides, holding hands felt like it belonged to a different Kendall and Evan, much younger ones.
“What, I’m not even allowed to touch you now?” Evan sounded completely put out. “We’re in a field and no one is anywhere around us.”
“I’m just wound tight today. Just let me worry for a while, alright?” Was that really so much to ask for? Sometimes she just needed to fret and worry things over until she came to some kind of peace with them. It was a process, and she wasn’t someone who could be teased or hand-held out of a fear or concern.
She expected him to tell her that was ridiculous, or crack a joke, or give her some kind of pep talk.
But Evan just walked in stride with her and said easily, “Alright, let you worry. I can do that. I can do whatever you need me to do, baby.”
That he could agree so easily, so nonchalantly, to give her whatever she needed, put the squeeze on Kendall’s heart. God, she didn’t want to lose this man, not again. Nor did she want to be stupid enough to shove him away.
Maybe she needed to embrace a little of his attitude and just enjoy yourself. Enjoy the success of her career, and the growing feelings between them.
Not to mention the absolutely amazing sex.
“Thank you.”
“My pleasure. I mean that most sincerely. I want to be with you, Kendall. In whatever way you’re offering.”
The simple words took her breath away. Kendall followed Evan into the dark interior of the barn, a little stunned at the intensity of the emotions coursing through her.
“See? Dirty. But a good place to hide from the world.”
“And make out.”
Evan’s eyebrows shot up. “Are you offering?”
She was. She wanted to feel him on her, feel that chemistry that sparked so quickly and burned so hotly between them, let his tongue sweep away her tension and make her appreciative, grateful, for all that she had.
“I’m not offering. I’m telling you. Kiss me now.”
The streak of sun from a hole in the roof was hitting the dirt between them, and Evan didn’t hesitate to step into it, closing the distance between them. “Offering, telling—either way, I’m taking it.”
“I don’t want to hide,” she told him as he wrapped his arms around her. “I just want us to be smart.”
“I know. It’s all good, sweetheart. We’ll work it out. One way or another, we’ll work it out.”
She didn’t know how or why, but looking deep into his eyes and seeing something there so familiar, so warm, so honest, she absolutely believed him.
“Okay.”
“I have something to tell you.”
There was something about the way he said that, the way he held her, that made her heart beat a little bit faster. “Yes?”
“I fired Eve.”
That wasn’t what she’d expected him to say at all. She wasn’t sure what she had expected, but something more romantic than that. “What?”
“I fired my sister. I felt like we were working at cross purposes.”
“Is that going to be a problem?” She didn’t imagine his family was going to be very happy with him.
But Evan just shrugged. “Everyone will just have to get over it.”
That was the confidence and blasé attitude she was totally missing. As Evan tugged her back outside by the hand and they strolled by the little lake, a few ducks splashing around in the sunshine, Kendall let his hand rest in hers. It felt good, right.
“Okay, that really wasn’t what I meant to tell you.”
“No?” She stopped when he did and glanced over at him. What she saw in his eyes didn’t make her heart beat faster—it just about stopped it. “What?” she whispered.
“I love you. I loved you ten years ago, and I love you now. Kendall, you just make me happy, plain and simple.”
His hand squeezed tighter in hers and Kendall swallowed hard, emotions welling up and threatening to overwhelm her. “God, I love you, too. And you make me happy.”
Plain and simple.
Just like that.
“Shhh,” he said, as he leaned down and brushed her lips across her temple. “Don’t tell anyone. It’s a secret.”
“Cross my heart,” she told him, her fingers mimicking his, before their lips met and she gave herself into the kiss.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
TO the average working American, having a housewarming party in the middle of the afternoon on a Wednesday might seem like a strange choice, but in the world of stock car racing, weekends were off limits for the most part, and it made more sense to pick a weekday. Which was why Kendall was stepping into Ryder and Suzanne Jefferson’s new house with a plate of brownies in her hand.
She had thought about sending her regrets instead of attending and having to be around Evan but not be with Evan, but she didn’t want to be rude. If any of the other drivers or their wives were willing to let Kendall into their social circle she wanted that opportunity. So often she felt like the outsider.