Ari. I had the worst feeling come over me. Something was wrong.
Rebecca was now looking at me, “I figured you would fall in love with him and then not even care about the test.”
“I need to leave. Don’t ever contact me again, Rebecca. Do you understand me? If you so much as look at Ari or me ever again, I’ll make sure you regret it.”
I took my phone out of my pocket and turned it on. I needed to talk to Ari. I had sixteen missed calls and five text messages.
I started to walk out of the room, as I called Ellie.
“Jeff, wait! Please don’t leave me alone,” Rebecca before she started to cry again.
I turned around to look at her when Ellie answered her cell.
“You motherfucker!”
I stopped dead in my tracks. What the hell?
“Ellie?”
“I never thought I could be as angry with you, Jefferson as I am right now. I hate you!”
Holy shit. What the hell is going on?
“Jeff?”
“Gunner? What the hell is wrong with Ellie?”
“Did Rebecca have her baby?”
“Um, yeah, but turns out.”
“Okay, do you think maybe now you could come to Hill Country Memorial Hospital in Fredericksburg? Your fiancée needs you.”
Oh my god. Ari.
“What’s going on, Gunner? Is Ari okay?”
“She was upset after you walked out on her. She took Rose out for a ride. Rose got spooked by a bolt of lightning and then took off running. She jumped a small creek and Ari fell off. She has a few bruised ribs and some other issues.”
I turned around and glared at Rebecca. This was her fault. I hated her more than I ever thought I could. I turned back toward the door and left before I did or said something I would regret.
“What other issues Gunner? Is she okay?” I started to jog down to the elevator. After I stepped in, I lost my cell signal.
“Mother f**king son of a bitch!” I yelled as I slammed my hand into the wall.
***
Once I got out of the hospital, I called Gunner back while I ran to my truck.
“Gunner, talk to me. What’s wrong with her? Is she awake? What else did she hurt?”
“Jeff, calm down. She hit her head, but they said she just has a mild concussion. And.”
“And what, Gunner!”
“She wants to be the one to tell you herself.”
What the fuck? “What? Okay, I’m on my way. I’m leaving Austin and heading to Fredericksburg now.” I threw the phone down in the passenger seat and took off.
***
By the time I got to the hospital in Fredericksburg, I was that shocked I didn’t end up with at least five speeding tickets. I rushed in to the ER and was told Ari was in her own room. When I got to her floor, walking off the elevator, I had the worst feeling. This was twice today when I had the feeling that I had just lost something important to me.
I looked up to see Gunner, Ellie, Mark, Sue, Emma and Garrett all sitting in the waiting room. Shit!
Ellie jumped up and started to walk over to me, but then Gunner got up and grabbed her. She looked pissed.
“Um, how long have y’all been here?” I asked, looking at everyone.
“Did she have the baby?” Ellie asked.
“Yeah, um, she did. It, ah…turns out she was lying to me the whole time. She was actually further along than she said. I only found out because I asked the doctor if the baby would be okay since he was born so early, and then he told me that Rebecca’s due was in two weeks.”
Ellie’s whole body started shaking.
“You left her! She told you that bitch was lying, and you just walked away from Ari. We all told you! You walked away, this is all your fault!” Ellie screamed.
As Gunner tried to pull her away from me. My heart started beating faster.
“Ellie, stop!” Gunner yelled, turning her around to face him. “Sweetheart, calm down, please.”
Emma walked up and took my by the arm. When I glanced over at Sue and Mark, I saw that Sue was crying.
“Emma, please just tell me what happened to Ari,” I practically begged as we started walking toward Ari’s room.
Emma looked at me and gave me a weak smile. “She should be awake. She asked to be alone until you got here.”
When I opened the door and saw her, I almost fell to my knees. My beautiful, strong Ari was lying in the bed. She was broken, and alone, crying.
I’d never felt such heartache in my life.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
ARI
My heart started beating faster the moment I heard Ellie talking to Jeff. I tried so hard not to start crying, but then I heard Jeff and Emma outside my room. As the door opened, I could feel the moment he walked into the room. I was looking out the window while the tears slid down my face.
I turned to him, and he looked like he was about to throw up. Good that motherfucker.
“So did you have your baby?” I asked with as much sarcasm as I could manage.
A tear rolled down his face as he looked me up and down. I was sure that I looked awful. My head was pounding, my chest was throbbing, and I even had a black eye. I wasn’t sure how I managed that one. I still say my ribs are broken. Stupid country doctors. I couldn’t even cry without everything on my body hurting.
“Oh god, Ari. I’ll never forgive myself for this, baby.”
Jeff came over and started to reach down to kiss me. I turned my head away from him.
“Ari, please…please don’t do this. What else was I supposed to do?”
“Did. She. Have. Your. Baby?”
“Yes, she had the baby, but he isn’t mine.”
I snapped my head back toward him. I wasn’t sure if I should be relieved or angry.
“What?”
“It turns out that she faked the whole contraction story to get me away from you. She had this whole plan, Ari. She was trying to pull us apart. Then her water broke, and she started freaking out that I was there. They put her under for a C section. When I asked the doctor if the baby would be okay since he was born early, he told me…”
Jeff just stopped and stared at me.
I knew it! I knew that bitch was lying the whole time. She was the reason this happened to me. I hated her more than ever.
“He told you what, Jeff?”
“He, um, he told me Rebecca’s due date was in two weeks. I confronted her when she woke up, and she told me the truth about everything. She’s so f**king twisted, Ari. It’s unreal. Baby, I don’t want to talk about her. The baby’s not mine, so we can put this whole thing behind us now. It can just be you and me, baby.”
He reached for my hand, and even though I didn’t want to touch him, I didn’t have the strength to pull it away.
“No, it’s not that easy Jeff. You left us. You picked Rebecca and that baby over us. I’ll never forgive you for this. Ever.”
Jeff looked confused as the tears started to slide down his face.
“Ari, no. Please don’t say that, baby. I didn’t pick her over you. I didn’t know what else to do, Ari! I was worried about the baby and.”
I shook my head. “Please just stop! Stop talking about that baby.” I looked back at him. “You left us, Jeff.”
“Ari, I’m here, baby, I’m here now. I promise you that I’ll never leave you again. I promise baby, never again.”
I just stared at him.
“Do you want to know what I was going to tell you before you left?”
“Of course I do, Ari.”
“I was going to tell you that you and I were having a baby, that our future was growing in my stomach. I wanted to tell you how scared I’ve been for the last week, how scared I was that you were going to be upset because I missed my pills and got pregnant, how scared I was that you would pick Rebecca’s baby over ours, and how scared I was that our baby might have Fragile X. I was going to tell you all this, but you left. You left to go be with Rebecca and a child who you didn’t even know was yours when I knew for a fact that you were the father of my baby.”
Jeff’s face turned white as a ghost. “Ari…we’re gonna have a baby?”
When I saw the smile slowly spread across his face, I died inside all over again.
I turned my head away and started to cry. Why didn’t I tell him sooner? Why am I blaming him when it was entirely my fault? If I had just told him, he might not have walked away from us.
“Ari, baby, I could never, ever be upset with you. When I held that baby in my arms, I felt nothing, and in that moment, I knew he wasn’t mine. I only want to have kids with you…only you.”
He reached over and turned my face back toward him.
This was tearing me up inside. I needed to tell him even though I knew I was about to devastate him.
“I lost the baby when I fell off Rose.”
He stood up straight and started to shake his head. “No…oh God… no.”
He slowly started to lower himself to his knees. When his knees hit the floor he put his head on the side of the bed and started to cry.
“Oh god…Ari. I’m so sorry, baby…oh god…this is all my fault.”
I wanted so badly to comfort him, but at the same time, I wanted him to hurt just as much as I did.
“I need you to leave, Jeff. I need to be alone.”
He looked up at me, eyes filled with tears. “I’m not leaving you again, Ari. I’m never leaving you again.”
“I don’t want you here!” I shouted at him. I winced in pain from my bruised ribs and pounding headache. Motherfucker! Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, that f**king hurt.
“I’m not leaving you baby. You can shout and scream all you want, Ari. I’m never going to leave your side again. It doesn’t matter if you want me here or not.”
Ellie walked into the room. “Is everything okay, Ari?”
When Ellie looked at Jeff on the floor, she saw that he was crying. Walking over, she dropped to her knees next to him.
“Jefferson.”
He turned and hugged her, and then he started crying even more.
Of all the times I’ve fallen off a horse, why do I now get ribs that hurt so damn bad I can’t move? I just wanted to be the one to hold and comfort him.
Shit! I’m losing my goddamn mind. I just told him to leave, and now, I’m jealous of Ellie hugging him.
“It’s all my fault, Ellie. It’s all my fault.”
Ellie kept telling Jeff it was okay.
No, it wasn’t okay.
“No, it’s not okay!” I yelled.
Ellie and Jeff both looked at me with concern.
Jeff stood up, took my hand, and kissed it.
“No, baby, it’s not okay. I’m so sorry I did this to you, Ari. Please don’t ask me to leave you. I just need to be with you.”
Ellie stood up and walked over to the other side of the bed. The two most important people in my life were on either side of me, so why did I feel like I was so alone?
“I…you didn’t do this to me, Jeff. It just wasn’t meant to be,” I struggled to keep the tears from falling again.
Jeff shook his head. I knew he was beating himself up inside right now. I was feeling so many things that I couldn’t keep them straight. I was tired. I hurt everywhere. I was angry, sad, and devastated. All of this rolled up into one. My urge to comfort Jeff was pissing me the f**k off also. I just wanted to be angry with him.