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Behind His Lens Page 14
Author: R.S. Grey

He pointedly drags out friends as though his blanket term couldn’t possibly be referring to me. No, he means fellow Upper West Side WASPs. This guy can’t be real.

Charley glances over at me with uncertainty in her eyes. What does she want? My approval? Does she want me to speak up and claim her? I’m your photographer, Charley, remember? I tip my brow and shrug before sipping my now cold coffee. It tastes like shit, but I need something to occupy my mind so I don’t have to watch her agree to go on a date with this douche bag.

“Um, okay. That sounds good, Hudson.”

Her words grate my heart and I squeeze the coffee cup so tightly that I think the ceramic might shatter beneath my fingers.

“Here, let me get your number and I’ll give you all the details before Friday.” He grabs his phone out of his tailored chinos, and at that, I stand and leave to go to the bathroom. I can’t sit there and watch her accept a guy’s date while we’re having coffee.

“Jude?” Charley asks, her soft voice nearly breaking my heart. I almost didn’t turn around, but for the f**king life of me, I can’t say no to the girl.

“I’m just running to the bathroom really quick.” I should leave. This is too much, but I swear the way she looks at me in that moment could melt the ice caps. During her conversation with Hudson she never once showed him the amount of feeling she’s giving me with that one look. There’s still hope.

CHAPTER NINE

Charley

“What the hell Charley!?” Naomi shouts through the phone.

“I didn’t want to be rude! What was I supposed to do?” I argue, flipping through the pages of my sketch book, trying to simultaneously sketch and appease Naomi all at once.

I swear the groan she emits just then could be heard across the Atlantic. “Tell him that you’re on a date with another guy and that it’s rude to ask you out like that!”

I huff, falling back on my bed with a thud and scattering my sketchbook to the floor. I cringe thinking of the bent corners I’ve just caused.

“Jude never said it was a date! And I tried to get him to look at me, to give me some sign that I should say no, but he shrugged it off. He didn’t care, and I felt like a complete idiot, so I said yes.”

“What happened after Hudson left?” she asks as if she’s a detective interrogating me under a harsh bulb.

I swallow and try to say the next sentence as calmly as possible. “I invited Jude to go with us to the club. He said he’d invite a date and we could all go as a group.”

No, saying it slowly didn’t make the phrase sound any better out loud.

“Which proves everything, Naomi. If he wants to invite a date then he isn’t upset that Hudson invited me.”

The sinking feeling in my stomach threatens to consume me as silence fills the phone line. I focus on the world through my window, contemplating mind over matter. If I tell my stomach and my heart and my legs and my eyes and my ears to stop pining for Jude, shouldn’t I be able to do it?

“You’re a fool. He said that to protect himself. He wants you, or he wouldn’t have invited you to get coffee. Which means you’re going to look freaking sexy tomorrow, and you’re going to prove to Jude that you want him and not dumb Hudson.”

“I don’t know, Naomi… Last time I attempted that it didn’t turn out so well.” My cheeks still burn looking at the spot near my nightstand where I drunkenly stood and stripped for Jude. I should wrap caution tape around the spot like it’s a crime scene. Lord knows I’ve avoided the four by four square as though physical remnants of my pride lay concealed under the varnished wood.

I drag a hand feebly down my face, wishing Naomi would let me go back to sketching already.

“This is different, really. I’m going to leave work at noon tomorrow and use a few personal hours so we can go shopping. You just have that catalog shoot in the morning, right?”

“Yes,” I murmur, knowing her mind is already made up, and maybe she’s right. I haven’t purchased any new clothes in a while because I’ve been saving all of my money from my modeling. A new dress would be nice.

“Perfect,” she chimes happily. “Let’s meet at Barney’s around one, okay?”

“Sounds good.”

“And, Charley… Do not give up yet. We’ll figure this out. He wants you. I know it.”

Her confident rallying speech makes me feel like we’re in the middle of Rocky. I half expect her to show up outside of my door in a moment with boxing gloves and an iPod playing “Eye of the Tiger”.

Naomi and I are scrubbed, buffed, waxed, and plucked. There is not a strand of unwanted hair on either of our bodies, and the hair that’s left is lying in big, silky waves down our backs. After we found the perfect dresses in Barneys, we treated ourselves to a spa day and got our hair and makeup done. It’s been ages since I’ve pampered myself and I feel sexy. Too sexy. But Naomi assures me the dress isn’t too much. Obviously, I don’t believe her, but I’m rolling with it because even I think I look edible.

My gorgeous cream, lace dress has three-quarter length sleeves and a plunging v-neck. It has a tank dress lining and a sheer, open back. The tight dress hits my legs literally a few inches under my ass, but it’s practically vacuum-sealed to my body so I don’t have to worry about the cool fall air exposing my underwear, or lack thereof. The dress is too tight for anything other than a tiny thong, but at least my lady parts are covered. I just won’t be doing any bending over at the club. Naomi, bless her gorgeous self, has the same size feet as me and let me borrow her four inch, nude Louboutin pumps to finish off the look.

“This is going to be such a good night,” Naomi declares from the other side of the cab’s back seat. I turn toward her and smile.

“I love that lipstick color on you. Especially when everything else is so nude.” She wiggles her eyebrows playfully and I laugh.

“It’s called Heat Wave. They used it on me at my photo shoot the other day so I picked some up on my way home.”

“Mmm…You look like a sex vixen,” Naomi mocks in a horrible Russian accent, making me laugh even more. The cab driver eyes us skeptically through the rear view mirror, and I can’t stop the giggles from taking me over. I’m completely giddy with the anticipation of seeing Jude soon. I don’t care that he’ll have a date. I just want to look at him. Know he’s real. That a guy is actually that sexy. I loved our conversation on Wednesday. It felt so natural to sit with him like that, tucked away in the corner of a coffee shop.

Naomi’s phone vibrates in her hand and her chocolate brown waves conceal her face as she bends to check it. “The guys just got there,” she says, reading off her text message.

“Cool,” I say, feigning calmness as I glance through the cab window. “Guess I should let Hudson know I’m on my way,” I mumble, even though that’s the last thing I want to do.

Naomi checks her lipgloss in her small silver compact before stuffing it back into her clutch. “I’m glad it’s cold enough for coats. That way, when we get inside the club, we can take them off and make a real entrance.”

I smile, shifting my gaze back toward her. “Why am I not surprised that Miss Drama Queen would love a grand entrance?”

She winks at me and slings her coat open to reveal her long-sleeve, black bodycon dress. “Please. With dresses like these,” she points her finger between both of us, “you can’t NOT have a dramatic entrance.”

I shake my head slowly, “Remind me to sign you up for a reality show when we get home. You’d be a celebrity in no time.”

“You wouldn’t dare,” she huffs dramatically, although I know it’s secretly her dream job. Getting paid to be crazy? She would never leave. “Not unless the Kardashians need a new sister. I’d have to change my name to Kaomi, but it’d be worth it.”

I’m still laughing at her fake name when the cab pulls up in front of Hudson’s new club, but the moment I spy Jude through the window, every ounce of humor is completely wiped from my body. Holy.

He and Bennett are standing outside on the curb talking to Hudson. There’s a winding line of people waiting to get into the swanky club. It wraps around the entire building. Girls shiver in their short skirts, checking their makeup and complaining constantly no doubt. Guys shuffle back and forth impatiently, checking out those same short skirts and trying to move closer to their prey for the night.

I knew Hudson’s club opening would be packed, but this is insane. Naomi reaches over to pay the cabdriver since I bought our lunches at the spa earlier, and I follow her out into the chilly night air. Music pounds from the club doors, reverberating through my body and joining the already pulsing rhythm of my heartbeat. And then my eyes fall on him again and everything else melts away.

Dark tousled hair, dark stubble, and icy blue eyes. Black fatigue jacket, a white t-shirt pulling taut against his muscled abs leading down to dark jeans, and his sexy leather boots. I lick my lips, tasting the sweetness of my bright red lipstick. He hasn’t seen me yet. He’s turned toward Hudson and Bennett with his hands tucked into the front pockets of his jeans. I would have stood there, frozen in desire, but Naomi pulls me forward and I follow blindly. As we walk up, cat calls sound from the crowd of people waiting in line and the guys turn toward the commotion. There are dozens of people on the sidewalk, but I don’t notice them because our eyes meet and the air ignites between us. His searing gaze glides from my eyes, to my lips, to my jacket and then slowly down my long, exposed legs. I want to squirm beneath his appraisal, but I can’t move. He’s got every motor unit in my body in lockdown. When he finally meets my eyes again, a fiery need burns behind his blue gaze and I can’t help but smirk. He hasn’t even seen the dress yet.

Just then, Hudson glides in front of me, cutting off the magnificent view and dowsing the once sizzling air. He reaches out to grip my shoulder in greeting, but his hand feels cold and my first instinct is to shirk away from his touch. I keep my eyes focused on the lapel of his black suit jacket as I try to will myself to plaster on a genuine smile.

“You look great, Clarissa,” he offers as his eyes peruse the same path Jude’s had only seconds earlier. Can he see that my skin’s already been set ablaze by someone else? I barely glance over his preppy suit and tie, but I offer him a friendly smile. His dirty blonde hair is gelled back, displaying all of his handsome features, but strangely I don’t see the appeal like I once did.

“Hi Hudson, thanks so much for inviting us. This place is packed.” I tuck my hands into my coat pocket, realizing how chilly the night air is without Jude’s eyes warming my body. “And actually I go by Charley now,” I clarify, hoping he’ll accept the transition without question.

A brief scowl covers his features before he offers a curt nod and turns toward the group.

“C’mon guys, let’s go inside.” Naomi squeals in excitement as Hudson’s hand hits the small of my back over my coat and dress. It’s not a crude gesture, but my eyes immediately dart to Jude as a wave of guilt hits me. Do I expect him to be upset? If so, I should be relieved to see him lift his eyebrows and smile before turning on his heel and leading the way inside.

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