She wanted to speak up at times, but then she thought better of it. If she didn’t hand him ammunition, he would be less likely to pull the trigger.
Reid yawned big and exaggerated. Devon knew he wasn’t tired. He was actually wired. Everything about the situation that put her on edge riled him up.
“I think it’s time we got out of here.”
“Are you sure? It’s still early,” Garrett said hastily.
Devon didn’t know if Garrett’s reaction was out of fear for her safety or because he had gotten along with Reid so well. She wasn’t really surprised. Reid got along with everyone, but she thought that Garrett wouldn’t play into his hand so easily.
“Yeah, I haven’t seen Devon in a while. I think we need some alone time,” he said, pulling her up with him.
“Reid,” Devon said quickly. She did not want to be alone with him.
“Do you want us to come with you?” Hadley jumped in.
“No. We don’t want to interrupt your evening,” he said smoothly.
Hadley looked at her pointedly. She thought she was being reassuring as if telling Devon, Here’s your chance. Devon regretted not telling Hadley the truth. She couldn’t be alone with him! This was absurd.
“It wouldn’t interrupt our evening at all,” Garrett said, standing as well.
“Really, don’t even worry about us,” Reid said. “We’ll see you in the morning.”
“Reid, I think they should come with us,” Devon said quickly.
His grip on her arm tightened, and she stopped breathing. It felt too familiar. She just wanted to wake up from her nightmare. Wake up. Please wake up. But she wasn’t dreaming, and she couldn’t get away from this.
“Don’t be silly, Devon. There’s no reason for them to come with us.” He smiled brightly at them. “Night, guys.”
Reid all but pushed Devon out of the club and into the empty street. He didn’t let go of her arm until he had secured her into his BMW.
“What were you thinking? You say we need to talk, and then you try to get them to come back with us?” he asked, backing out of his parking space.
Devon didn’t bother saying anything. She was trapped, hopelessly trapped, and she had done it to herself. Her meager attempts at getting Hadley or Garrett’s attention had only upset him.
She hoped that she could keep Reid’s anger at bay. She was starting to doubt her own sanity at ever agreeing to leave Jenn’s with him. She turned toward the window and closed her eyes. Her thoughts drifted back to Brennan—heated kisses, soft caresses, trusting conversations, freedom. She was doing this for him. After it was all over, maybe he would forgive her.
Chapter Twenty-Six - Adrenaline
“WAIT…” DEVON SAID, actually paying attention to her surroundings for once. “This isn’t the way to Hadley’s.”
Reid tightened his grip on their laced fingers. “I thought we could use some privacy.”
“I thought we were going back early for privacy,” she said, her voice coming out hysterical. This couldn’t be good.
“Haven’t you exploited their hospitality enough, Devon? I think it’s a good idea for them to have the place to themselves tonight. I thought it would be a good surprise,” he said, smiling. He took a turn that led them farther away from the apartment.
She didn’t even have a pretense to hide her fear. Her heart was hammering, and her breath was coming out heavy. Where was he taking her? She didn’t feel comfortable talking to him in a place she thought of as home, so she certainly wouldn’t feel any better somewhere else.
“Where are we going?” she asked in a demanding tone.
“Don’t you like surprises, Devon?” he asked as calm as ever.
She knew he could tell she was afraid. She hated that fear was taking her over because she was pretty sure he reveled in it. He liked to see her cower and back away. He liked to have control. She was giving him what he wanted, and she couldn’t do anything to keep herself in check.
A few minutes later, Reid pulled up to the valet of a tall skyscraper, and the valet helped her out of the car. She then realized where they were. She hadn’t thought that she could feel sicker, but he had proven her wrong.
A hotel. Really? A hotel? She couldn’t believe this was where he was taking her. Okay, yes, she could. It made perfect sense. She almost made a smart-aleck comment about whether the place charged by the hour. Luckily, she restrained herself. She didn’t even want to think about what happened in hotels by the hour. That might actually break her character.
The valet zoomed off with his car, leaving Reid alone with Devon.
He smiled brightly at her. “Nice surprise, right?” He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in close. “I missed you so much, Dev.”
Devon stepped out of his embrace. “I can’t go upstairs with you, Reid.”
“Why?” he asked, his eyes hardening.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” she said, trying to remain strong.
Waiting for Reid’s reaction was like turning the handle to a jack-in-the-box, knowing it was going to pop in your face.
“You haven’t seen me in two-and-a-half months. I get us a nice hotel room in the city, and I’m excited to see you. And you don’t want to go up with me?” he asked. “What’s wrong with you, Devon? What’s changed since you left?”
Devon sighed and looked down at the ground. What was wrong with her? Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad. They had a lot of stuff to talk about, and it’s not like they could stand outside the hotel all night.
“Are you seeing someone else? Is that what this is about?” he asked.
She heard the tension in his voice, and she tried to remain perfectly calm. If she reacted at all to her thoughts of Brennan, it would be bad. She couldn’t let Reid know. She had to keep that one thing from him. She was safe as long as Brennan’s identity was kept safe.
“No, I’m not seeing anyone,” she said softly, staying as calm as possible. “I just feel like we’re rushing.”
“We’ve been together for three years. How could we possibly rush this?” he asked, reaching out for her.
“You know what I mean,” she said with a shrug.
“Just hear me out, Dev,” Reid said softly. He cupped her chin and lifted her face to his. “I love you so much. I’ve missed you something fierce. If you feel like I’m rushing you, then I’m rushing you. I want to talk. I want to spend time with you. It’s been too long since I’ve gotten to be with you. Just come upstairs with me.”
Devon bit her lip and stared up into the face of the man that she had thought for years was her greatness, her true love. Something in his pleading seemed to weaken her resolve. Maybe it would be different. If he loved her, maybe it would be different.
“Please come with me, Dev. I’ve been a mess without you.” He planted a tender kiss on her lips.
“Alright,” she said softly, breaking the kiss. “We’ll go upstairs and talk.”
He smiled like he had won a prize, and then he took her hand and walked her into the hotel. They took the elevator, and after they reached the floor and found their room, Reid slid the room key into the slot. Devon walked in before him and heard him push the lock over to bar entrance. She swallowed and looked around. It was nice enough with a small living area and a king-size bed. She didn’t even bother looking in the bathroom. The last thing she wanted was to see another one of her nightmares.
Devon decided to take a seat on the chair in the living space. It faced the door and away from the bed. She wanted a clear view of the exit, and she wanted to avoid the bed at all costs. That was the way she wanted to handle this, focusing on a clear escape route.
“Okay…” Reid walked up behind her and began to massage her shoulders.
When he touched her, she tensed up, and he just rubbed harder. She was so on edge. She didn’t know what was going to happen.
“You said you wanted to talk, so let’s talk.”
“Um…alright,” she began.
“Let’s talk about how you lied to me. Or we could talk about how you ran away to Chicago. How about we talk about how you’ve been acting all night or how scared you looked when I found out that you were lying? Maybe we should just talk about the bartender,” he said, his voice thick with venom.
Devon felt like she had stopped breathing. Not Brennan. They couldn’t talk about Brennan.
“Ah, so it is the bartender then,” he said like he had stumbled upon something.
“Reid,” she gasped out, trying to find air.
“You said you wanted to talk. I think we can talk about him first. Did you f**k him?”
He pushed into the muscles of her shoulders so hard that she tried to jump away from him, but he held her tightly in place.
“Reid, that’s not why I’m here,” she cried. “Stop! You’re hurting me!”
He only held her more firmly. “Sometimes, I don’t think you listen to me unless I force you, Devon.”
“I’m listening!” she spat in frustration, trying to wrench herself away from his grasp.
“I don’t think you are because you haven’t answered my question yet. Did you f**k him? It’s a yes or no question, Devon.”
She swallowed. She couldn’t talk about Brennan. How did Reid know? She had done everything she could to keep Reid from finding out, yet he had still figured it all out. She wanted to break down and cry, but Reid didn’t deserve her tears.
“No answer, Devon? You lost your voice somewhere? I’ll just assume that means yes.” He let go of her shoulders and walked around to the front of the chair.
She tried to stand, but he pushed her back down to a sitting position.
“You were here acting like a whore while I was in St. Louis missing you. Doesn’t really seem fair to me, does it?”
He was acting completely insane. She needed to get out of there. This was going nowhere fast. How had she let him manipulate her so perfectly? He had preyed upon her weakness and her desire to make him happy. Even when she was desperate to get rid of him, it was hard to break old habits. For so long, the thought of being without Reid put her in an agonizing state of self-doubt and fear, but now, she realized she had only projected what it actually was like when she was with Reid on to what she assumed it would be like without him. Living without Reid had led her to Brennan, and when she was with him, she had neither self-doubt nor fear.
“You wanted to talk, but I’m doing all the talking,” he said. “Don’t you have anything to say for yourself?”
He grabbed her arms and hoisted her out of the chair he had just thrown her into. His hands circled her bicep and squeezed, pulling her face-to-face with him. The pressure on her arms was agonizing.
“You want to know why I left?” she asked. “This is why I left. I was tired of you hurting me.”
“If you didn’t hurt me so badly, I wouldn’t have to do anything. Why do you want to hurt me, Devon?” he asked. He shook her forcefully. “Explain it to me. Why would you leave me, lie to me, cheat on me?” he yelled.