“Please what?”
Stop. Don’t stop. I don’t freaking know.
“Surely you’ve done this to yourself before?” he asked, his voice dark and sinful. “Tell me.”
“Brian, I…” She trailed off into a moan when he twisted his fingers inside her.
“What did you say to me last night? You wanted me to let you get a little bit dirty. Tell me, Candace. Tell me what you do and what you think about.”
She’d fallen into the Twilight Zone. The world outside was bright and cheerful; birds sang, cars zipped down the street. This was her room, her bed, her belongings. Yet it was an entirely different dimension she’d fallen into. He was its gatekeeper.
“Y-yes, I’ve done this.”
“What do you think about? Do you imagine someone else is here, doing it to you?”
She nodded, her entire state of being reduced to the sensual slide of his fingers in and out of her p**sy. So many times, she’d wished it were him doing that to her. And now it was.
“Tell me.”
The words burst out of her throat with an almost humiliating eagerness. “I think about— I think about you. I promise I’m not just saying that because you’re here now. I think about you doing this to me. And kissing me there. I think about…you making love to me.” She wanted to cringe even as she said it.
He lowered his lips to her ear, nuzzling the soft, sensitive shell. “And when I make love to you,” he murmured, sending chills skittering madly down her arms, “am I gentle? Or am I rough?” He pushed his fingers hard when he said the last, driving a gasp from her. His palm connected with her cl*t and he pressed it firmly, still keeping up his torturous rhythm inside her body.
“If I’m having a—oh, God—having a bad day, or if I’m sad, I imagine you’re gentle. But other times…I just want you to…” She sank her teeth into her bottom lip, lifting a hand to cover her face.
“Don’t be embarrassed,” he whispered. “Although I love the way you blush. Tell me what I do, how you need me. The darkest fantasies you have, in the last wild moments before you make yourself come, what do you imagine I’ve done to you?”
She shook her head on the pillow, not wanting to lend voice to those thoughts. He gentled his movements, and she grasped his wrist hard enough to make her knuckles go white, terrified he would stop if she didn’t reply. “You tie me up,” she said.
“Fuck.” He moved his mouth to her shoulder, exhaling warmth across her skin, and then trailed it over to her breast. Her nipple slipped into his mouth, and he sucked it until she whimpered. All of it was too much for her, but she needed so much more.
Once the words were out there, she couldn’t stop them. “You tie me up and I’m helpless, all spread out for you. You can take whatever you want and I let you have it all.” His teeth sank into her soft flesh, and she cried out. It was the best pain she’d ever felt in her life. “S-so maybe I’m not as innocent as you think I am.”
“Oh, you are,” he murmured, releasing his hold on her nipple, leaving it shining with moisture. It was so stiff and aching and throbbing from his ministrations she wanted to touch it herself, to soothe the sting away. “But I do love that you fantasize about me. Maybe you’ll call me next time you’re in the middle of one and you need to hear my voice to get you through. I’ll tell you what I wish I was here doing to you. However you need me, rough or gentle.”
Her cheeks flamed at the thought of that deep, wicked voice purring her to orgasm as she stroked herself. Letting him hear her moan his name as she came for him, only for him, even if he was across town.
“I will,” she said. “I think I’d love that.”
Suddenly, he pulled his hand from between her legs and rose up over her, pushing her thighs down to the mattress so that she cried out and nearly had a panic attack.
Oh God I’ve set him off he’s going to do it he’s going to…
He dragged the tip of his c*ck between her labia, coating it with her moisture, but he didn’t push inside. “Fuck, I want to,” he muttered, and she had the feeling it was more to himself than to her. “I want to more than I’ve ever wanted any f**king thing in my entire life.”
She was dying. Couldn’t lie still, wriggling closer, tilting her hips, trying to get him to slip inside. It wasn’t possible. Given his girth, it would take more than a mere “slip” to get him in. But he appeared to have complete control of himself, and he evaded her every move.
She let fly a string of curses she hadn’t known she was capable of, calling him a choice name or two. He had the audacity to grin. He rubbed his crown over her clit, letting the little ball on the underside skim over it. Strong hands gripped her h*ps and lifted them off the bed, while he kept up the delicious back-and-forth motion across the aching bundle of nerves, his shaft cradled by her labia. Oooh, that was good. And it would make her come soon, but it wouldn’t assuage the empty ache. She needed to be filled up by him. If he would only move down an inch or so, he could push in…
“Do it,” she sobbed. “I don’t care, Brian, just—”
“Baby, I don’t have any condoms on me. I’m guessing you don’t, either.”
She shook her head, her brow furrowed with frustration.
“I’m not going raw in you.”
“You were going to until you found out I’m a virgin.”
“No, I was praying you had something. Or were on something. I told you, I didn’t come here for this, and I meant it.”
She thought it was a convenient lie, and wanted to argue further, but her muscles were tightening deliciously, shutting down the connection between her brain and her mouth. Brian’s eyes closed and he groaned, grabbing his shaft and pumping it as he rocked against her. She had only a moment to appreciate how gorgeous he looked this way, muscles standing out in his arms and his abs, before the sensations in her sex overtook her entire body, exploding outward. She could only wish he was inside her to feel how she would grip him.
“That’s it, sweetie, come for me,” he murmured, the words dissolving into a groan that brought as much pleasure to her as everything else he was doing. She reached out and fisted the sheets as he ground out a curse and warmth erupted across her belly, though he had the foresight to move a bit so that her tattoo wasn’t endangered. Unabashed, she arched against him, her head thrown back, feeling his gaze on her swaying br**sts even though her eyes were closed. It wasn’t often that she felt truly beautiful, but in that moment, with the lush pleasure he’d given her zinging along her nerve endings, she could have believed she was.
It was the only thought at the forefront of her mind as he eased her back down to the bed and back down to earth. All the heat had rushed out of her body and suddenly, she was cold. She just needed him to hold her. Again, she couldn’t stop shaking.
His weight came slowly down on her and she wrapped her arms tight around him, feeling at once deliriously happy and more than a little furious that he’d made her beg like that. Helpless tears leaked from her eyes as she leaned her face into his shoulder. Maybe he would hold her until she could get control, and he wouldn’t have to see her cry again. Was it too much to ask to maintain at least a shred of dignity around him? He’d about taken it all away.
Bullshit, he didn’t have any condoms. She wanted to scoff. He probably had one in his wallet right now. But she didn’t really want to know if he’d lied to her.
With some effort, she cleared her throat and prayed he wouldn’t hear tears in her voice when she spoke. “I can get up and make some coffee.”
“That would be awesome.” He rolled away from her and pushed the hair away from his eyes, staring up at the ceiling. She took the opportunity to surreptitiously swipe at her cheeks with the sheet. Time to put on her big girl panties and deal with it. The consequences had been laid out for her from the beginning.
“Do you mind if I jump in the shower first?” she asked, considering the mess they’d made.
“Only if I can go right behind you.”
“Sure.” He could be in there with her, if he wanted to. Jerk.
The hot spray did little to clear her head as she rinsed away the last remnants of their interlude. But at least the water running over her face camouflaged the tears she finally let flow in earnest. Had to get them out of her system now. Get them out, get it over with. She didn’t have any idea where this was going, but it hadn’t hit a brick wall or anything. They had time. They were okay.
So why was she near sobbing?
She jumped and whirled when he entered the shower behind her, his chest brushing her shoulder. “Thought you were coming in later,” she said, hearing panic in her voice. He was looking straight into her eyes, which she knew were red and weepy. There was no hiding that, or the trembling of her bottom lip.
Dammit. Caught.
Brian slicked the hair back off her forehead, as he was apparently fond of doing, then put his hand to her elbow and gently moved it up to her shoulder. When he wordlessly pulled her to him, she hated herself for going so willingly, and for utterly breaking down when his arms wrapped securely around her, holding her tight to him as she sobbed.
Chapter Eight
Somehow, they fell back into an easy and amiable manner with each other, drinking coffee out on her patio under a flawlessly clear sky. Candace had not only put coffee on, but whipped up a batch of pancakes and made him the best damn omelet he’d ever had in his life, and he was stuffed. The morning was mild, and she wore a silky white robe he’d love to strip off her, but that time had passed. Still, she was beautiful, her hair damp and her face clean of what little makeup she ordinarily wore.
He needed to stop these lightning-flash thoughts about how nice it would be to spend every morning with her. That way could only lay disaster. He didn’t want to take the one thing she had left before he had time to examine this feeling, to see if it could turn into something real. It was tough getting her to understand that. She was such an all-or-nothing go-getter. He loved that about her, but damn. She was a handful.
And such a go-getter that she’d damn near gotten it this morning. One flip of his switch while he’d been poised at her entrance and he’d have been lost. The thought of having her tied up and at his mercy had almost been enough to do it. Imagining her gasping and sighing over his phone had compounded it. If she’d only reached down and run her fingertip along her cl*t where he could see, he’d have been a crazed beast. Seeing a woman touch herself was his trigger.
Hell, they’d pretty much done everything-but over the past ten hours. Her virginity really shouldn’t have been that big a deal at this point. But it was. It was huge. If he’d lost control and taken her the way he wanted, he’d have left here feeling like a dog, because he would have hurt her. No question.
She deserved something special. She deserved candlelight and roses, shit like that. A promise, at the very least. Something he didn’t feel he was in any position to give her.