I flushed, hating that our life was being discussed so openly. "Dad!"
Dad ignored me, focused intently on Kellan. As Kellan unwaveringly met his eyes, I suddenly saw my dad's true fear with me dating a rock star. It wasn't really that he considered the job frivolous, or that there was an alarming potential for drug or alcohol abuse. It was that my dad didn't think Kellan could possibly be faithful to me. It was my own fears reflected back to me. Somehow, that made them seem all the more possible.
Beside me, Kellan whispered, "Yes."
I blinked and looked over at him, not expecting him to answer so honestly. It stung, too, knowing that he was getting offers. Even if he was rejecting them, it still hurt to know that they really were out there. My eyes started watering and Kellan purposely avoided looking at me.
Dad leaned forward in his chair and I looked back at him, begging my eyes to calm down. I did not want to cry in front of my parents. They would never trust Kellan if I didn't trust him. As Anna sputtered that none of this was Dad's business, Dad pointed the last of his bacon at Kellan. "Don't you think it would be better for Kiera then, if you paused the relationship while you were away...so she doesn't get hurt by your...admirers?"
Kellan shook his head. "I never...I don't..." He closed his eyes, taking a moment to collect himself. Just as I felt my eyes starting to pool over, Kellan opened his and looked over at me. "I love your daughter, and I'd never do anything to hurt her."
My mother stood up then, collecting Dad's plate. "Of course you wouldn't, dear. Martin's just being an ass."
Dad frowned at Mom and I blinked, staring up at her. Mom never swore, not even the mild ones. When Dad looked about to object, Mom gave him a glance-the glance. It was a pointed look that said so much. It was a full-on sentence in just a second of connection. She may as well have screamed-You have said enough, and if you open your mouth again there will be hell to pay in this house for the next six months! It is Christmas morning and I will not let you make my baby girl cry while she is here visiting us, for quite possibly the only time until next winter, by making her doubt the man that she is clearly head-over-heels in love with!
Dad wisely said nothing.
When a strained quiet fell over the table, Mom looked around. "Should we open presents then?"
Kellan slapped on a smooth smile as he stood up. "Sounds wonderful, Mrs. Allen."
Mom smiled at him around her hands full of plates. "Caroline, dear."
Kellan nodded at her. "Caroline, thank you for breakfast. It was incredible." He motioned around the house with his hand. "Is there a bathroom...?"
"Oh, sure." Mom motioned upstairs with her one free pinky.
Kellan smiled and looked around the room as he excused himself. He seemed happy and unperturbed, but I saw his fingers go to the bridge of his nose as he turned the corner to head upstairs. I knew enough about him to know that the conversation had bothered him. He was taking a minute.
My eyes snapped back to Dad when Kellan was out of earshot. "Dad! What was that all about?"
Anna crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him. Dad looked between the two of us. For once, his face was almost sheepish. "I'm sorry if I stepped over the line there, Kiera." He leaned forward and pointed his finger to where I could hear water running upstairs. "But these are questions you need to ask yourself if you are going to be in a relationship with him. Is he on the same page? Does he really love you? Can he turn down woman after woman? If you take the relationship to the next level, will he soil your marriage bed?"
I flushed and looked down, too flustered to say anything. Anna spoke up in my silence. "He's a good guy, Dad. You don't even know him."
Her hands free now, Mom came up to rest her palms on my shoulders. "That could have been handled more privately, Martin."
Dad glanced up at her. "I'm just looking out for our daughter."
I peeked up at him then. "I can look out for me, Dad." Glancing over my shoulder really fast, I leaned in and whispered, "I've had all of the doubts that you have, okay. I think about it. I worry about it." I shook my head. "But I love him. Shouldn't I give him the chance to fail before I condemn him?"
Dad's eyes widened as he sat back in his chair. A hand rubbed over his jaw as he softly smiled at me. Fatherly pride stretching over his face, he shook his head. "You always were too smart for your own good."
I relaxed back into Mom behind me and shook my head. "Not really...but I'm trying to be smarter." I bit my lip, not wanting to let too much truth about my vast failings slip out. My parents still didn't know the real reason Denny and I broke up. They assumed he had left the country for a job, and I was content to let them think that. "I'm in love with him, Dad. Pausing...isn't an option for me."
I heard a sniff from the doorway and looked back to see Kellan standing there, head down as he listened. He looked up and met my eye, a genuine, peaceful smile on his face. Dad sighed, maybe finally seeing that he really had lost his little girl. I stood up and walked over to Kellan. Cupping his cheeks, slightly moist, like he'd splashed water on them, I searched his unique eyes. "Not being yours isn't an option anymore," I whispered.
He nodded, and leaned down to kiss me. I let him, Dad be damned.
Twenty minutes later, you wouldn't even know the conversation had happened. Kellan let it slide off of him and Dad even seemed a little chagrined that he'd brought it up. He even stopped his sullen, disapproving looks at Kellan. He didn't suddenly turn warm towards him or anything, but he did stop being the brutish, overprotective father.
Anna had forgotten about the moment the minute we stepped near the tree. Honestly, eating breakfast first was the hardest part about Christmas for her. We'd only started doing that in the last couple of years, when the presents part of the holidays started taking a back seat to the family part of the holidays. But she was still a giddy little girl when it came time to rip open stuff.
Kellan sat beside me on the couch as she started doling out gifts. She handed everybody a similarly wrapped, flat square and made us all open them together. Kellan laughed as he looked around at all of us opening Anna's gift. I laughed when I saw what it was. We were all now proud owners of next year's Hooters calendar. I blinked as I stared at the three orange and white clad vixens on the cover.
Dropping my jaw, I looked up at her. "You got the cover?"
Anna clapped and giggled, stomping her feet in her excitement. "Yes! I was hoping you didn't see one in the stores, I wanted to surprise you."
I stood up and gave her a hug, Mom and Dad and Kellan following suit. I knew she'd made the calendar, April, from what she'd told me, but the cover was an even bigger deal. Sitting back down, I flipped to her page. God, she was pretty. I immediately closed it. Kellan set his aside and grabbed my hand, leaning into me. Smiling over the fact that he hadn't peeked at her picture, I kissed his cheek.
The standard gifts went around the room-clothes, books, music, movies and games. The merriment in the air was palpable as we all laughed and enjoyed each other's company. Kellan silently watched the whole affair, his eyes soft and speculative. When it got near the end of the pile under the tree, Anna handed him a present from my parents. He blinked at the gift, surprised, like he hadn't been expecting to receive anything from them. Honestly, I was pretty surprised, too.
My dad was wrapped up in playing with a new, techy gadget, but Mom watched Kellan as he turned the present over and over. I elbowed him gently. "Open it."
He looked up at me, then at my mom. "You didn't have to..." He shrugged and Mom smiled.
"I know."
Swallowing, Kellan unwrapped the present. Inside a simple, white box, was a small scrapbook. Kellan smiled as he started to flip through the pages. I blinked as I looked over his shoulder. It was a book about the two of us, about our life together. There were pictures of just me, some taken when I was pretty young. There were pictures of Seattle-his house, the bar, the Space Needle. And then there were pictures of the two of us.
Most of those pictures were candid, like we weren't aware that we were being photographed. There was one of him staring at me at work. I had my back to him, helping a customer, and the look on his face was nearly reverent as he secretly watched me. There were others where we were smiling at each other, laughing at some private moment. A few were of us softly kissing each other. And the very last photo was a close-up of the two of us cuddling together, sleeping on my ugly, orange sofa. Even in sleep, Kellan had a soft smile on his face.
Anna giggled and I glanced up at her and Mom. As Kellan shook his head in disbelief, Mom quietly said, "Anna helped me put that together for you, Kellan. So you could take a piece of home with you on the road."
Kellan looked up at her, his eyes a little glossy. "Thank you...so much."
Mom nodded at him. Sniffing a little, he brightened and reached over the back of the couch to dig through his bag. "I have presents, too."
I smiled and tilted my head at him. Grinning, he dispersed gifts to Anna, a joint one for my mom and dad, and one for me. Grinning myself, I pointed to where I'd been hiding one for him at the back of the Christmas tree. "Don't forget yours."
He smirked at me, grabbed it, then sat beside me again. As my family opened his presents, laughs and thank yous going around the room, Kellan and I stared at each other. "Together?" he whispered, lifting my gift in his hands.
I nodded, and we started tearing into each other's gifts at the same time. I watched him more than opened mine, then laughed when I saw he was doing the same. Shaking my head, I stopped and pointed at the gift he was halfheartedly opening. "You first."
He frowned, then laughed. A few minutes later he was holding what I'd purchased for him. He was hard to shop for; he didn't really need or want anything. But there were a few things he cared about and I'd played on those when I'd started looking around for presents. One, he liked to write. He was constantly scribbling lyrics into spiral notebooks that were shoved into his dresser drawers. So I'd gotten him some really nice journals to write in, maybe for the lyrics that were keepers. He was also trying to be more involved with writing the music, so one of the journals was just music sheets.
Second, Kellan liked the classics. Being stuck on a bus with lots of noisy boys, I thought he might like a reprieve. I'd gotten an outstanding deal on a Discman, and loaded up some CDs with all of the classic rock songs that he'd occasionally sing around the house. The technology was out of date, MP3 players being all the rage now, but considering Kellan still had a tape player in his car, I figured it was about as far as I could push him in that area.
Thirdly, Kellan liked sex. Not wanting to give him something that would embarrass me in front of my family, I'd taken a picture of the moderately sexy outfit that was awaiting him when he got back home. I'd picked it up right before heading out here, after he'd jokingly mentioned buying me something. For some reason, I knew our style levels would be completely different, and if I was going to wear something...like that...I wanted to be the one picking it out.
Finding the picture tucked in one of the journals, he glanced at me with a raised eyebrow. When I pointed to the cuffs in the very top corner of the picture, his grin turned heated. I flushed, knowing I would have to be very, very drunk to ever, ever use them, but the look on his face was worth it.