“Why?”
“The massage, the oral, the kissing, the talk…I don’t think I needed to know that you did that with other girls, after all.”
“I didn’t,” I said right away.
“What?”
“I never did any of that with any other girl.” I lifted my head up and looked down at her.
She tried popping up, too, arguing. “But…but I told you to tell me—”
“You wanted to know what other girls got of me. Well, that’s what they didn’t get.” My voice was firm but soft. I needed her to hear me. “I never touched their bodies like that or held them. I never cared about them enjoying it. They didn’t get any part of me worth having, Tate. Especially, K.C. I never touched her like this.” I stroked her hair. “You own me body and soul, and everyone is going to know it. Sometimes I’m going to go slow with you, and sometimes I’m going to f**k you. But it will always be love, Tate.”
Always has been. And always will.
Chapter 33
I didn’t know if she believed me, so I just waited, worried like hell that she didn’t feel how much I ached for her.
Holding herself up by her hands, she arched back up to meet me and sniffled.
Shit. I swallowed.
She was crying.
“I love you,” she whispered, turning around.
Her face was falling apart. She was holding back more tears than she was letting out.
Grabbing onto both sides of her face, I pulled her into me. “I don’t deserve it, but I will. I promise.”
Her small, sweet smile and hooded eyes were so exhausted that I was afraid to let go of her as I pulled out.
“Ow,” she whispered, sucking in her breath through her teeth.
“Yeah.” I placed my hands on her hips, supporting her. “Ease down. You’re going to be sore.”
“I already am.”
“Stay here,” I told her, handing her a towel and wrapping the other one around my waist. “I’ll go run the shower and come back down to get you.”
“I can make it upstairs,” she laughed.
“Stay.” And I walked off.
After running the water and checking the temperature, I ran down and picked Tate up in my arms.
“So I guess the birthday spankings are out,” I joked as I carried her upstairs.
She rolled her eyes. “What is it with guys? Madoc already offered at school yesterday.”
“He did what?” I halted at the top of the stairs.
She wound her arms tighter around my neck and leaned in, taking my earlobe between her teeth.
I let out a hard breath, and Madoc was forgotten.
“The water should be good.” I pulled back the curtain and set her down in the tub.
“Turn on the shower part,” she said sleepily, sitting down on the floor and hugging her knees. “It sounds like rain.”
I pulled out the knob, watching the water spray down on her legs, and then I yanked off my towel to climb in behind her.
Sitting down, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her back against my chest.
“You know,” I spoke in her ear. “I stayed in your room for a month while you were away.”
“What?” She twisted her head towards me, and I hugged her close.
I didn’t know what it was, but all of a sudden I wanted her to know everything.
“When I got into trouble, and my mom left to get sober, your dad took me in. Set me straight again. Well, straighter, anyway. I slept on your floor.”
I tried to keep my voice light, but I was choking on the words. “I hated that you were gone, Tate. I picked fights with everyone. I skipped classes. Even the love I have for my brother couldn’t pull me out of it. When I controlled you, I had one f**king thing in my life that made sense. That made my blood rush. I looked forward to tomorrow when you were around. If I could zone in on you, then I wasn’t thinking about everything else that hurt.”
Tate laid her head back on my shoulder and peered up at me, wide-awake now.
“Why wouldn’t you sleep in my bed?” she asked softly.
I touched my lips to hers, soft and warm. “Because you wouldn’t have wanted me there.”
I was a sick man.
I could humiliate her, isolate her, and hurt her, but sleeping in her bed while she was away was too invasive? Yeah, I couldn’t explain it, either.
She leaned in, trailing kisses along my jawline. Shivers spread out across my arms when she whispered against my neck. “I definitely want you in my bed. And I love you.”
Closing my eyes, a big, fat smile spread across my face. If only Madoc could see me now.
Or maybe not…
“Say it again.”
“I love you,” she said louder with a laugh in her voice.
“More,” I taunted.
“I love you.” She kissed my cheek. “I love you.” Another kiss. “I love you.” And she kept teasing me with her soft, wet kisses until I caught her lips and kissed her hard.
We’re never leaving this shower.
“How are you feeling?” I asked when I’d let her go.
“Good.” She nodded and wiggled her eyebrows. “Maybe we should see what it’s like in water.”
Heat and every other f**king source of energy inside of me shot downward, but the crushing disappointment hit me like a brick.
“Can’t,” I mumbled. “I don’t have any more condoms.”
Maybe Tate had some.
Wait… she f**king better not.
“Jared, I want a picture!” my loud-mouthed and unusually invasive mother shouted as I raced up the stairs.
Picture?
I shook off my annoyance as I looked for my car keys on my dresser. Tate and I were headed to Homecoming.
Scratch that—Tate, Madoc, and I were headed to Homecoming. They were both waiting outside when all I really wanted to do was punch him in the gut, send him home, and skip town with Tate for the weekend.
But…the a**hole did have a hand in making me jealous, forcing me to act, and he was a good friend.
Most of all, though, Tate wanted to go. I owed her that.
“No pictures. Jesus,” I cursed, shaking my head as I snatched my keys and rushed downstairs.
But my mother was waiting at the bottom. “Oh, no you don’t.” She grabbed my arm to stop me as I tried to walk past her.
I turned, trying to appear annoyed, but I was a little amused at how naturally she wore the mother role.
Ever since our heart-to-heart at the fish pond, we’d found some common ground. We still weren’t all hugs and kisses, but we spoke gentler and showed more patience.
“What?” I couldn’t hide the smile that peeked out. “I don’t do pictures…Mom.”
Her eyes widened with a sparkle, and she cleared her throat before straightening my black tie.
“Alright, but I do have something to say, and you’re not going to like it.” She kept her eyes trained on her task of fixing my tie and steadied her voice with a firm tone. “Honey, I couldn’t be happier that you and Tate found your way back to each other—”
Oh, Christ.
I started to turn away.
“But,” she said loudly, pulling me back around to face her, “baby mommas don’t usually marry baby daddies.”
Every word was bit out like I was too stupid to understand.
I cocked my head to the side and looked down at her, indulging her need to make a point I already understood.
Don’t get Tate pregnant. Yeah, thanks. I got it!
Her eyes peered up at mine, threatening. “You’ve been over there almost every night—well, every night, actually—and if you make me a thirty-six year old grandmother, I’m going to kill you.”
She was joking.
I think.
Anyway, my mother had nothing to worry about. Tate and I were careful, and she’d been keeping me off of her all week anyway. She didn’t want to get distracted from classes, and I hadn’t been pushing it.
Tonight, though? Yeah, she was in for it.
Letting out a sigh, I gave my mother a quick peck on the cheek and slid out the front door.
Tate was standing on her front porch, looking gorgeous as hell, talking to Madoc like they were friends.
I shook my head, not believing the turn of events. She’d broken his nose, kicked him in the junk, and traded words more than once with him.
But she was like her dad. Solve the problem and move on.
And Madoc was more than ready to move on. He had been excited for the dance, and was dressed to impress. We looked almost exactly the same, but whereas I wore all black, he changed his suit up with a purple tie.
Tate still looked the same—beautiful and glowing—but a little more dangerous. I half-expected to get in a fight over someone flirting with her tonight. She was wearing a tight, nude-colored, strapless dress that fell mid-thigh. I could see so much of her skin that it was pretty clear what she looked like nak*d.
Walking up to Tate, I kissed the soft spot under her ear. “Sorry that took so long. My mom was giving me a talk.”
“About?” she pressed, as Madoc came over and took her other arm.
“About not getting you pregnant,” I whispered out of the corner of my mouth but kept my eyes forward.
Even though I wasn’t looking at her, though, I could see her stiffen, and I heard her clear her throat.
And I shouldn’t have told her that.
I really needed to put a halt to my honesty streak, but there was still something I needed to tell her, and I’d been on too much of a high the last week to face it.
Later, I told myself.
“Are we ready?” Madoc asked from her other side.
Her clutch on my arm relaxed, and I felt her exhale a breath.
“Totally,” she nodded at Madoc. “This is the start of a great friendship.”
“It could be the start of a great porno, too,” Madoc shot back, and I clenched my fists.
“Son of a bitch!” I yelled, half-annoyed and half-joking. “You’re going to get it tonight,” I warned, but they both just laughed.
Chapter 34
The Homecoming dance was exactly what I thought it would be. Pictures, punch, and poor-ass music. The gym had been decorated in a New York theme, which Tate loved, and I was extremely f**king delighted that Madoc had joined us, after all.
He filled in where I failed.
Dancing in public? Check.
Cutsie pictures with loving poses? Check.
Polite, futile, nonsensical chatter? Check.
I played along, but situations like this were like eating a mouthful of lemons. Madoc made it more fun for Tate at least.
And her?
She read me like a book.
She was light on the public displays of affection and heavy on the eye f**king.
I couldn’t wait to get her home.
But we had another appearance to put in first.
“Are you sure you want to go?” I asked her as we walked hand-in-hand up the Beckman’s driveway.
Tori and Bryan Beckman, twins and our classmates, were having an after party, and Madoc insisted that we get our thumbs out of our asses and get crazy.
“I’m fine,” she whispered. “Not tired at all.”
I raised my eyebrows and shook my head. I wasn’t worried about her being tired, but I didn’t want to bring up last year’s incident, either. That’s what I was really worried about.