Daniel popped the cap on both beers, and I sat down across from him at the kitchen island, taking a sip before I spoke. "So, how long have you known Ben?"
His eyebrows went up, a fraction of an inch. I'd expected him to snap shut like a clam, but he seemed much more interested in my question than in protecting his own secrets.
"Close to a decade now," he said. "We fell out of touch." He cleared his throat and rotated his beer bottle thoughtfully. "It's funny - you know, he asked me about you."
I shouldn't have been surprised, given his behavior at the park. Clearly I had his interest in some form, whether I wanted to or not. But my heartbeat quickened, my throat drying slightly as I tried to process this information. "Really? What'd he want to know?"
Daniel shrugged. "The usual. Where'd you come from, what are you up to, do you have a boyfriend..."
I let out a bewildered little laugh. "What'd you tell him?"
He shrugged. "Said I didn't know. But I have his number, if you want to clarify a few things."
Picking at the label of my beer, I tried to make sense of all the conflicting thoughts swirling around in my head. "Don't tell him I asked, okay? He doesn't need any encouragement."
That earned a grin. "All right, but can I tell him you'll call?"
I sighed. "I don't know, I mean...I'm still trying to settle in. It's so quick."
He nodded, obviously sensing that I wasn't telling the whole story. But I was mindful that whatever I said would probably get back to Ben, and I really didn't want him feeling like he had to prove himself to me.
After a moment of silence, he spoke again. "He didn't leave a very good impression on you, did he?"
I shook my head. "We've run into each other a few times," I admitted. "I don't know quite what to make of him."
Smiling down at his drink, Daniel finally answered me, after a few moments of thought. "Well, I can't tell you what to make of him. I'm still trying to figure that out myself. But I know he's one of the most loyal and trustworthy people I've ever met. He gives you that vibe of someone who'd sell out his own grandmother - but I've never had any cause to regret trusting him."
With what?
I was dying to ask, but I know he wouldn't tell me.
"So the whole insincere thing...it's just an act?" I was suspicious, and understandably so, I thought. "Why would you want people to think that about you?"
Daniel shrugged. "I couldn't tell you, but I do know he's been going through a bit of a messy divorce. He doesn't talk about it much. The fact that he's shown interest in somebody else means he's seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. He's got walls, but they might not be up forever."
The conversation drifted to other topics after that, but on my bus ride home, Daniel's words kept echoing in my head.
I didn't want to be anyone's light at the end of the tunnel. Least of all, a man like Ben. So why was it, when I closed my eyes, all I could see was green flecked with gold?
Chapter Six
Ben
Chemistry.
It's purely elemental, something that just happens. You can't fake it, can't force it, can't do anything except stand back and watch. Put the right ingredients together - or the wrong ones, depending on your point of view - and the results can be explosive.
A lot of people who met me just assumed I was some idiot rich kid who knew nothing about the way my father's company worked. They were wrong - not that they really cared. There were certain things people just wanted to believe about me, and knowing the truth didn't support that. I studied long and hard to understand exactly what it was we were doing. I threw myself into the science of pharmaceuticals, determined to understand the reports from the labs, to actually speak to the doctors and the researchers in their own language. On more than one occasion, I was told it wasn't necessary. But that never mattered to me.
I earned the spot at the head of the boardroom table, even though I didn't have to.
It's true, it was coming to me either way. So I guess I'll never know the meaning of truly striving for something, that fear of losing - which is what people really mean when they talk about "hard work." It's not supposed to be a choice.
In all fairness, I didn't ask to have a choice. And when it came down to it, I wanted to do the best I could.
Chemistry was always my favorite. Put just the right amount of two things together, and watch the results. They were always predictable, and you couldn't fake a reaction.
That was the thing about me and Jenna. She might deny it, but deep down inside, she knew. We had chemistry. I could feel it sizzle and pop between us, and I knew it wasn't just me.
Chemistry's never one-sided. To put it in purely scientific terms, it takes two to tango.
She liked me. She liked me where it mattered - at the base of her brain, in the chemicals deep inside, the things she couldn't change or control. No matter how much she disliked me or distrusted me, up at the frontal lobes where we try to think and reason and understand things, she couldn't change that one simple fact.
She liked my smell. She liked feeling the heat from my body, close to hers. She liked the sound of my voice and eventually, I'd prove that she liked the taste of my mouth.
It was purely elemental. Pure chemistry.
I'd never be able to convince Daria and her bloodsucking lawyer of anything at all - not without real chemistry. She'd know the difference. She'd dig and she'd dig, she'd hire every private detective in the city until she had proof of my deception. She'd take it to the judge and I'd be well and truly fucked.
But it didn't matter if the marriage wasn't real, so long as the chemistry was. Daria would feel it - somewhere down deep in the core of that twisted lump of coal that she called a heart.
The more I thought about it, the more sense it made. If I wanted to keep my company, I had to convince Jenna to marry me.
The "how" was a problem I'd deal with later on.
Chapter Seven
Jenna
Just as I'd expected, I ran into him at the grocery store again. I wondered if this was his usual haunt, or if he'd come here on purpose to try and wheedle me into a date. I almost wished Daniel had never told me about his interest; it was more fun when I didn't know that Ben was just trying to get into my pants.
He was frowning at the shelf of peanut butter and jelly, and I could have easily walked past. I didn't even need any peanut butter. But for some reason, I stopped, sidling up next to him and snickering a little when he didn't even notice someone was nearby.
"You all right, Chase?" I nudged him with my elbow, because I felt like it would annoy him. "You seem a little out of sorts."