Even if Danny doesn’t kill me, even if he does something and goes back to jail…I’ll never be able to go back to Max. I’ll never put him in harm’s way again for something stupid I did in my past.
Mia exited her compact rental car, using the moonlight to find her way up the steps of the ranch style house, the place that she had called home for the last two and a half years. Digging in the dirt of the wilting potted plant next to the door, she grasped the key to the house, dusted her hands on her jeans and opened the door. She flipped on the lights, getting welcome relief from the darkness, thinking it was too bad that it couldn’t illuminate the dimness of her heart and soul. The house still looked the same: comfortable leather furniture in the living room, the stone fireplace that brought coziness on cold Montana winter nights, and tons of memories of the grandmother who had taught her to make her first piece of jewelry right here in this home. She’d found peace here; she’d found herself here. But now, she could feel nothing except a hopelessness that nearly swallowed her whole. There had never been a time when she hadn’t yearned for Max, but after seeing him again, the pain of separation was unbearable.
Dropping her purse and house key onto the couch, she made her way to the kitchen, glancing at the clock to make sure it wasn’t too late to call Maude and Harold, her closest neighbors. The ranch was small by Montana standards, a hobby ranch, but it still left her isolated. Maude and Harold watched the ranch when no one was here, which had been all of the time for many years before she had moved in over two years ago. She dialed their number, explaining that she was back and they didn’t need to come over daily anymore to care for the horses. It was something she actually enjoyed doing, and the reason her hands were rough and not manicured. And the exercise around the ranch had slimmed her body naturally. After a short chat with Maude, she hung up, exhausted just from trying to sound cheerful on the phone. Everything was an effort, and trying to pretend like everything was okay was painful. It wasn’t okay. Max was completely gone from her life, and it felt like she had lost part of herself, a portion that she’d never find again.
You’re Mia Hamilton. You don’t have to be Mary Peterson anymore.
She had been Mary Peterson to everyone except Maude and Harold, who knew exactly who she was from her visits when she was younger, when she had spent her summers here with her grandmother. They had been friends with her gran, and there was no way she could have fooled them. Even though it had been years, they remembered her, but they had kept her secret. There had been very few others who really knew her—even as Mary Peterson. She’d lived in isolation at this ranch, making trips to Billings only for supplies, to sell her jewelry, and for her counseling sessions.
It doesn’t matter if everyone knows who I am now. It’s not like I’m keeping any secrets anymore. I’m trying to lure Danny here, away from my family.
Still, it was unlikely that anyone would recognize her, even though she wasn’t planning to hide her real identity anymore. Her neighbors were too busy on their ranches to read social gossip from Florida, and she had always stayed out of the media as much as possible. Even when she went to Billings to see acquaintances again, no one would know who she was, who her parents had been, if she told them her real name. That was one thing she loved about living here. People here either liked her or they didn’t because of the person she was, not because of how much money she had or who her family was.
Mia walked back through the living room, down the hallway and into one of the bedrooms that she had converted into a workshop. As usual, the room was chaotic, exactly as she had left it. But the disorder was an organized mess. She knew where every stone, decorative bead, and piece of metal was located. In the absence of availability of the gems and metals she had usually worked with, Mia had started working on Native American inspired pieces of jewelry and had found her niche as she never had in working on fancy jewelry without any real meaning to her. Now, every piece she made was a labor of love, every article containing a part of her as she’d crafted each ring, bracelet, and pair of earrings.
Miraculously, her unique items had caught on, and she sold enough to make a living, never really needing to touch the money Travis sent.
That’s why I watch prices; I don’t overspend. I wanted to make my own way, and I did. The only time she had used the money Travis had sent was to buy her rather old pickup truck, a necessity when one lived so far from town.
Wandering aimlessly, she walked into her bedroom, her eyes darting to her dresser immediately.
It’s still here.
Without really thinking about her actions, she went to the dresser, picked up her wedding ring and slipped it on her finger. Wearing it brought in equal parts happiness and sorrow.
I should have never seen him again. I should have waited to talk to Travis and left.
“Now he’ll really hate me,” she whispered to herself, her voice filled with anguish. But she’d needed to do it, needed him to hate her and never try to seek her out.
God, she’d missed him so much. There hadn’t been a day since she’d left him the first time that she hadn’t ached to see him, hadn’t felt like part of her was missing. While she’d had the hole in her memory, she couldn’t remember what it had felt like to be away from him. Now, she remembered, and it had hurt like hell. Her only solace had been that her family was safe.
She tried to take the ring off again, but she couldn’t do it. The weight of the platinum band and beautiful diamonds gave her a small measure of comfort. It wasn’t much, but it was something.
Walking back to the kitchen, she dialed Travis’ office number, but he didn’t answer. He’d apparently changed cell phone numbers during the last few years, and she didn’t know his current number. Trying Kade’s number, she got his voicemail, hanging up without leaving a message. Kade rarely carried his cell phone, a habit he had acquired from being in the public limelight for so long, his phone ringing constantly and leaving him with no peace unless he turned it off and left it at home.
Her hand hovered over the numbers on the phone, so damn tempted to call Max just to tell him how sorry she was, how much she loved him.
“No!” she told herself harshly, putting the phone back in its cradle. “You can’t talk to him ever again. You need to separate yourself from him completely. You’re dangerous to him.”
There was so much Max didn’t know, so much she’d never told him. What would he think of her if he really knew how stupid she’d been, how very damaged she’d become from her past?