You didn't tell me because you didn't want to.
But that made no sense. Why wouldn't he want to tell her? Once again, his thoughts were interrupted by images from the past: the white garter belt... a bowl of popcorn .... the stained-glass flower on the door to his apartment.
Cut the crap, Tom. This has nothing to do with me.
Blood in the white bathroom sink, and Meredith laughing about it. Why was she laughing? He couldn't remember now; it was just an isolated image. A stewardess putting a tray of airline food in front of him. A suitcase on the bed. The television sound turned off. The stained-glass flower, in gaudy orange and purple.
Have you talked to Max?
She was right about that, he thought. He should talk to Max. And he would, right after he gave Blackburn the bad news.
Sanders was back at his office at two-thirty. He was surprised to find Blackburn there, standing behind Sanders's desk, talking on his phone. Blackburn hung up, looking a little guilty. "Oh, Tom. Good. I'm glad you're back." He walked back around Sanders's desk. "What have you decided?"
"I've thought this over very carefully," Sanders said, closing the door to the hallway.
"And?"
"I've decided to retain Louise Fernandez of Marin, Howard to represent me."
Blackburn looked puzzled. "To represent you?"
"Yes. In the event it becomes necessary to litigate."
"Litigate," Blackburn said. "On what basis would you litigate, Tom?"
"Sexual harassment under Title VII," Sanders said.
"Oh, Tom," Blackburn said, making a mournful face. "That would be unwise. That would be very unwise. I urge you to reconsider."
"I've reconsidered all day," Sanders said. "But the fact is, Meredith Johnson harassed me, she made advances to me and I turned her down. Now she's a woman scorned, and she is being vindictive toward me. I'm prepared to sue if it comes to that."
"Tom..."
"That's it, Phil. That's what'll happen if you transfer me out of the division."
Blackburn threw up his hands. "But what do you expect us to do? Transfer Meredith?"
"Yes," Sanders said. "Or fire her. That's the usual thing one does with a harassing supervisor."
"But you forget: she's accused you of harassment, too."
"She's lying," Sanders said.
"But there are no witnesses, Tom. No evidence either way. You and
she are both our trusted employees. How do you expect us to decide who to believe?"
"That's your problem, Phil. All I have to say is, I'm innocent. And I'm prepared to sue."
Blackburn stood in the middle of the room, frowning. "Louise Fernandez is a smart attorney. I can't believe she recommended this course of action to you."
"No. This is my decision."
"Then it's very unwise," Blackburn said. "You are putting the company in a very difficult position."
"The company is putting me in a difficult position."
"I don't know what to say," Phil said. "I hope this doesn't force us to terminate you."
Sanders stared at him, meeting his gaze evenly. "I hope not, too," he said. "But I don't have confidence that the company has taken my complaint seriously. I'll fill out a formal charge of sexual harassment with Bill Everts in HR later today. And I'm asking Louise to draw up the necessary papers to file with the state Human Rights Commission."
"Christ."
"She should file first thing tomorrow morning."
"I don't see what the rush is."
"There's no rush. It's just a filing. To get the complaint on record. I'm required to do that."
"But this is very serious, Tom."
Chapter 12
"I know it, Phil."
"I'd like to ask you to do me a favor, as your friend."
"What's that?"
"Hold off the formal complaint. At least, with the HRC. Give us a chance to conduct an in-house investigation before you take this outside."
"But you aren't conducting an in-house investigation, Phil."
"Yes, we are."
"You didn't even want to hear my side of the story this morning. You told me it didn't matter."
"That's not true," Blackburn said. "You misunderstood me entirely. Of course it matters. And I assure you, we will hear your story in detail as part of our investigation."
"I don't know, Phil," Sanders said. "I don't see how the company can be neutral on this issue. It seems everything is stacked against me. Everybody believes Meredith and not me."
"I assure you that is not the case."
"It certainly seems like it. You told me this morning how well connected she is. How many allies she has. You mentioned that several times."
"Our investigation will be scrupulous and impartial. But in any case it seems reasonable to ask you to wait for the outcome before filing with a state agency."
"How long do you want me to wait?"
"Thirty days."
Sanders laughed.
"But that's the standard time for a harassment investigation."
"You could do it in a day, if you wanted to."
"But you must agree, Tom, that we're very busy right now, with all the merger meetings."
"That's your problem, Phil. I have a different problem. I've been unjustly treated by my superior, and I feel I have a right, as a longstanding senior employee, to see my complaint resolved promptly."
Blackburn sighed. "All right. Let me get back to you," he said. He hurried out of the room.
Sanders slumped in his chair and stared into space.