I plunk myself down on one of the Adirondack chairs. Jamie takes the other. He's studying me as if I hold the answer to life. His face is so serious.
“Ave?” he finally says. I shade my face with my hand. Uh oh.
“Yeah?”
“You're not sick, are you?” I open my mouth to lie. But I can't do it anymore.
“I'm not sick. But Mom is.”
Peter
I wait on the roof, trying to give Ava privacy. But I hear every word. I hear her blood rush as she confesses her mother's illness to Jamie. Her pain at hiding the truth from him had finally become too much.
“I've wanted to tell you so long. I just... couldn't.” Tears roll down her skin. Jamie breathes steadily next to her. Listening. Deciding what to say. She picks at the paint on the chair, composing herself. Despite her pain at saying the words, an immense sense of peace engulfs her, and, in turn, engulfs me in a glorious relief. The desire for his blood evaporates from her.
“Oh Ave.” The chair protests as he gets up. Their clothes rustle as he folds her into an embrace. That simple gesture breaks her. Their hearts beat in opposition, synching for one moment. Sounds erupt from her. Tearing, painful sounds that rip at my ears. I want more than anything in that moment to go to her. But I stay where I am. Listening.
And then a sound I do not expect. Laughter.
“I can't believe I finally told you. I haven't told anyone. Not even Tex.” The sound comes out of her like a rushing river. I delight in the sound.
Jamie is as shocked as I am. But I hear him smile as he wipes the tears from her cheeks.
“I'm glad you told me.”
“I'm sorry that I waited so long. It's just that with Cassie and everything, I didn't want to put more on you.” He pulls her into a hard hug, almost stealing her breath.
“This is what I'm here for. This. Right here. Being here for you. Because we're there for each other. We're family.”
“I love you, James.”
“I love you too, Ave.” They hug again. And then Ava makes a joke about getting snot on his shirt and the moment is broken. Laughter sparkles in the air and they dissolve into talking about human things. School. Teachers. Homework. Things I could never understand. Things I could never share with her.
So I sit and wait for her to come back to me. She is human. She must have moments to be the girl she would have been if she had not met me.
Chapter Eleven
Ava
Jamie brings me soup and ginger ale and everything from his medicine cabinet. And cheese and butter and bread. And Stand by Me, our favorite movie to watch together. He knew me so well.
“What about practice?”
“You're more important.” And I knew that I was.
But part of my mind is still on the roof with Peter. Part of my heart as well. It wasn't something that I could control. He'd Claimed part of me, and I'd given him the rest.
I also keep one ear turned toward my mother's room. From the sound of her deep breathing, she's asleep.
Jamie stays for two hours, made me grilled cheese, tomato soup and sitting next to me on the couch. I have to keep moving over because his blood was making me want. I try to focus on the movie, but the blood want keeps poking at me.
“I'll be right back,” I say, hoping he'll think I'm going to the bathroom.
“I'll be waiting.” He sounds like Peter. I dash up the stairs, tear open my door and shove my face out the window. Gulping fresh air, I almost scream when a face appears in front of me. He's upside down, hanging over the edge of the roof like Spiderman. I have flashes of that kiss in the rain scene in the movie. Now is not the time for kissing, Ava.
“I was coming to get you.” I've never seen Peter upside down. It's a good look for him. At least his hair is out of his face so I can see those amazing eyes. They fix on mine, unblinking.
“Thanks. I'm fine. I just needed a minute.” I breathe in through my nose, out through my mouth.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. I'm good now. I got this.” I toss him a smile before pulling my head back inside. My body protests leaving him again, pulling me back toward the window. It's a bit like trying to run through the ocean. Something's always pulling you back. I fight against it.
Jamie's licking the butter off his fingers when I flop back on the couch. I stick my tongue out at him. He grabs my nose, but there's something wrong. The sun has gone behind the clouds again.
“What's up James?”
“Nothing.” He smiles, but it's weak. I know his face almost better than my own.
“Nope, you don't get to do that. I got to dump my stuff on you, you get to do the same. We're family, remember?” He looks down at his hands.
“Jamie?”
“I'm just worried. About Cassie. And what's going to happen when the baby gets here. I don't know what Dad's going to do.” Jamie's dad may be an alcoholic, but there was no way he could hurt a baby. No way.
“He hasn't hit her again, has he?”
“No.” He lets out a breath of relief. “He's actually been sober for a two days. He went to an AA meeting.”
“Really?” I never thought I'd see the day. “Maybe he's going to change.”
“Maybe. But I can't stop thinking that it's only temporary. That he'll do it for a little while and then something will go wrong. I'm just scared, Ave.”
“I know. But if you expect him to fail, then he will. He needs your support. Maybe this baby is what he needs to finally turn his life around.” I wasn't ready to say everything happened for a reason, but maybe this was a case when it did.
“She let me feel it move the other day,” he says quietly, a tiny smile almost coming out. If anyone would love that baby as much as it deserved, it was Jamie.
“That's really cool, Uncle Jamie.” I toss my napkin at him. He laughs, finally.
“Sooo, Tex and I were thinking about throwing Cassie a baby shower. Unless one of her friends is already doing it.”
Jamie snorts. “You and I both know Cassie doesn't have friends.” She did have a habit of burning her bridges when it came to friends, even in high school. “Besides, she's done with most of her friends. They were the ones who got her into this in the first place.”
“So, do you think it's a good idea?”
“Who would come?”
“Tex and me and your mom and mine and...” I can't think of anyone else. “I could invite Aj.”
This makes Jamie laugh. Everyone adores my Aunt Jenny. Well, except my dad, but that's because they were brother and sister.
“We don't have to think about it right now. We have a few months to plan it out.”