The wall comes twenty miles later. I cannot go on.
“Peter?”
“I cannot move.” I have to tell him the truth. He stands over me, an unfathomable expression on his face.
“Wait here.” I have nothing else I can do. I cannot move at all. I turn on my back and stare at the stars. I hope she is seeing the same stars. Orion's belt dances above me. I close my eyes and try to bring up her face. Dark hair in loose curls, ivory skin, those green eyes. The most perfect face. It blurs, waving in and out, like a reflection on a disturbed pond.
“Hello, Peter dear.”
It is Di. I cannot make my jaw work to give her a response. This was what I suspected. She found a loophole. Ava was right.
“You didn't listen to me. This girl is destroying you, little by little. You should have killed her.”
I clench my teeth and try to think of Ava's face.
“You made me do this. I wouldn't have if you would have done it. Cal, precious?”
“Yes, mother.”
Ava would slap me for being so blind all those years.
Cal picks me up and puts me over his shoulder. I can do nothing to stop him. Di puts her face against mine.
“I missed you.”
“I love you,” I say, because it is the only thing I can say. It is true. Even after all this time and all she has done. The love is there. But not by my choice.
The promises we make, we cannot break.
“I know,” she says against my cheek. “I am doing this for you.”
We run, farther away from Ava. I know not where we are going. It does not matter. I am completely paralyzed within a few miles. My eyes stay open, staring at Cal's furred back. Di runs gracefully next to me. She could fly, but chooses not to.
Against the two of them, I am useless. There is only one thing to do. Ava, Ava, Ava. Ava-Claire, my Ava, mine, mine mine. I call out her name in my head, projecting it along the connection I can no longer feel since it is stretched too tight. For the first time since I became a noctalis, I prayed. I asked God, if he could help her. I did not care about me. But if I was like this, it meant that so was she. I could not have that. I prayed like I used to when I was young.
As I lay me down to sleep...
Please help my Ava. Let her survive.
I said it over and over to the beat of Ivan's walk. It was the only thing I could focus on. It was the only thing I could hold onto. Everything else was slipping away. With. Each. Step...
Ava
I finally wake from the pain/drug-induced haze. Something has changed. I slit my eyes open, which takes the force of pushing boulders. The light in the room is soft and grey. Morning is approaching.
“Something's wrong.“ The words come out of my mouth like mush, but a voice answers me. My lips crack like earth in the desert.
“I would certainly say so. I thought we were going to lose you.“
“Why isn't he back?“
“I warned him. I told him this would happen. No matter, it all leads to the same end. All roads lead to Rome, do they not?“ He had said something like that before, but I can't remember when.
He turns from the window and walks into my vision. He peers down at me as if he's never seen me before. “You look like death warmed over.“
“Thanks.“ I try to keep the talking to a minimum. “Where's Peter?“
“Would you like my honest answer? Or the answer you want to hear?“ What kind of question was that?
“Honest.“
“Probably buried in a hole somewhere. Or a dungeon. Perhaps a mausoleum. Someplace dramatic. If there is one word to describe Di, it is dramatic.“
“Di?“ What did she... Oh. Fuck.
“Take me to him.“
“Very persuasive, my love. You are not really in a state to be making demands, are you?“ His head tips to the side, but it's not like when Peter does it. I close my eyes to shut it out.
“Why?“
“Because he loves you.“
“Can't.“ I hear, more than see him blink.
“Nevertheless, he does. And Di does not want to lose him.“
“Save him.“
“You know that is the last thing I want.“
“Save him. Save me.“
“Interesting. Even in this state, you try to manipulate me. Bravo.“ My bed dips as he sits down. If he starts clapping, I'm going to lose it. Not that I have much to lose, anyway.
“Save me. Get revenge later.” I try to reach out to him. He moves away. Yes, that's right. I can't touch him. But didn't he touch my head? Oh what the hell does it matter? He laughs and I wish I could cover my ears.
“Oh love, you are something. I can see now why he Claimed you. Not that I would do it myself.”
“Josephine?” I try to make my voice go up at the end of the word so he understands it's a question. He stares at me for a second and I know, without the shadow of a doubt, that he would kill me if he could.
“She wanted to be married first.” His voice is quiet. He looks away from me, as if seeing me is painful.
“Why?” My voice is going. I don't have much time. I feel my life slipping away. I fade out for a moment.
“That was who she was. I never even had a chance to kiss her.” Wow. That's crazy. I can't imagine that. My mind goes away again, and I feel like there are little lights popping in my brain. It won't be long now.
“Revenge.” It comes out, “rshsmgsche.” He understands anyway.
“True.” He turns again, and I can feel him watching me. “There is something about you. Even in that state. You remind me of –” he cuts himself off. Huh. I fade again. I try to speak again, but it doesn't happen. And then I feel it. So faint and far away I almost don't feel it. A tug. Somehow I get the strength to open my eyes and move my arms to try and push myself up. I slump back down, my face smashing against the covers. I panic a little, because the fluffy blanket is shoved in my face and I can't breathe. Someone moves it. I move my eyes up to meet his.
“Please.” My arm comes up and I reach for him, palm up. Even though I know he can't touch me.
“You, my lovely, have put me in an interesting situation. On one hand, I can leave you here and you will probably succumb. But my quarrel is with Peter, and not you. No matter what I have done, I do not take a life lightly. I see you do not believe me, but it is so. On the other hand, if I bring you to Peter, then he owes me for saving you. It would not exact my revenge, but maybe it can be exacted another way. Having Peter owe me a favor I would be able to cash in at any time might come in useful.” He turns around, looking at the sky for a moment. “And I do not want Di to win. While Peter took something from me, so did she.” I'm not going to mention the fact that if Di hadn't changed him, he wouldn't have met Josephine, because then where would we be? I don't care if Peter owes him a million favors if it means we get to be together.