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Upon A Midnight Clear Page 50
Author: Linda Howard

She thought back to his accusations about Tony. Perhaps she had been too harsh with her father. She really didn't think Tony was using her, but on the other hand, she hadn't known Tony all that long. She pushed aside the momentary feeling of doubt as she reminded herself to trust her feelings.

If Tony was not the person he appeared to be, then she intended to find out for herself.

Besides, the issue was not whether Tony was right for her. She wasn't sure about that herself. The issue was whether her father had any right to "forbid" her to see anyone.

She sighed as a pang of guilt stabbed at her conscience. She was acting like an indignant, self- righteous child. Her father was ill--and not only that, he was in a time warp. She was sure that part of him believed that she was still a little girl. He was trying to protect her in the same way he had protected her from dating a boy three years her senior. She should be happy that he was finally demonstrating paternal feelings. Expressing his dismay must have been a big step for him. At least he was communicating--even if he was telling her something that she didn't want to hear.

Since his surgery, he seemed to be trying hard to change... perhaps he just needed time. In the meantime, they both needed to realize that it was not going to be easy becoming a part of each other's lives once more. And she hadn't made it any easier by getting involved with the surgeon who had saved his life.

But what her father didn't realize was how being with Tony had helped her to understand him better. Until she became involved with Tony, she had had little idea of the stress her father had suffered. Tony had helped her to see her father not as a cold, distant, hard man, but as a man who was coping with a traumatic and difficult job as best he could.

The phone began to ring again. Kim knew it wasn't Tony; he was in surgery until later that night. She assumed it was her father calling to apologize. And she had now cooled off enough to accept.

But it was not her father on the phone. Nor was it Tony. It was Dr. Harkavey.

And he was calling to tell her that her father had suffered another heart attack.

Kim sat in the critical care waiting room. It was almost ten o'clock, and she hadn't had anything to eat or drink since Dr. Harkavey had called. All she could think about was that her father might die. And that it would somehow be her fault. Why had she upset him by gettiag involved with one of his peers? She had sacrificed the only family she had left for a relationship that would probably turn out to be no more than a... fling.

"Kim."

She looked up. Tony sat down beside her, putting his arm around her. "I just heard." She nodded.

"Sometimes this happens. I've spoken with Dr. Harkavey, and your father's already stabilizing. It was a very mild attack. He's responding very well to the medication. He'll be okay."

"Tony," Kim said calmly. "We need to talk.''

Tony stiffened slightly. "Sounds serious."

"I've enjoyed spending time with you, I really have. And I appreciate everything you've done for my father..."

"What are you saying?" Tony asked quietly, the surprise evident in his bloodshot eyes.

Kim took a deep breath and then said, "I think we should redirect our relationship. You know. Just be friends."

Tony just looked at her as the impact of her words settled. "What?"

"Look," she said reasonably. "I came back here to be with my father. I just..." She paused, her willpower suddenly crumbling. She blinked back the tears as she said, "Please try to understand."

"What's the matter, Kim? Is this because of how your father feels about me? Are you worried that he won't approve?"

"It's true that I don't want to upset him, but I'm not doing this because of him." She paused, as she quickly attempted to gather the thoughts that were darting around her mind. "My whole career... my life is in Florida. This is an important time for me. I'm just making a name for myself there____"

"You can make one here."

She shook her head. "No," she said, stubbornly. "I can't leave now."

"I'll wait. I'll wait as long as necessary..."

"I can't be with you, Tony. I'm sorry. I just... I know what your career demands. I know what my mom went through with my dad She wanted more... and because of that, neither she nor my father was happy."

"What are you talking about? I have a busy, demanding job, that's true. But so do you..." he said, frustrated.

Kim shook her head. "I know how difficult it is to love a man who's obsessed with his work. I don't blame you... I think you're a wonderful doctor. I just... that's not what I want for my life. I want someone who's there for me when I need him, someone who can be there for my children."

"You have children?" he asked, trying to throw in a little humor. She didn't smile.

"I'm not your father, Kim," he said as the smile faded from his mouth. "I don't live just for my career. I want a family, too... I want a wife to share life with..."

"Look at you, Tony," she said sadly. "You live in a house with no furniture. It doesn't bother you because you're never there. Why? Because you're always at work."

"I see," he said quietly. He shook his head. "I thought... after last night... I..." He paused searching for the right words as his eyes locked with hers. "I thought I had found the person I wanted to share my life with. Was I wrong?"

Kim glanced away.

"Kim, don't do this just because you're frightened. We can slow things down... take time to get to know each other," he said quietly, putting his hand on top of hers.

"Last night was a mistake," she said. "We're opposites, Tony. We had a good time, but it's not going to go any further than that."

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Linda Howard's Novels
» Kiss Me While I Sleep (CIA Spies #3)
» All the Queen's Men (CIA Spies #2)
» Kill and Tell (CIA Spies #1)
» Cry No More
» Dream Man
» Ice
» Mr. Perfect
» Now You See Her
» Open Season
» Troublemaker
» Up Close and Dangerous
» White Lies (Rescues #4)
» Heartbreaker (Rescues #3)
» Diamond Bay (Rescues #2)
» A Game of Chance (Mackenzie Family #5)
» Midnight Rainbow (Rescues #1)
» Mackenzie's Magic (Mackenzie Family #4)
» Shades of Twilight
» Mackenzie's Pleasure (Mackenzie Family #3)
» Son of the Morning