Turning back to my plate, suddenly ravenous, I picked up my fork and started, in a very unladylike way, shoving forkfuls of pancake into my mouth. Teren behind me chuckled and bent down to kiss my chipmunk-like full cheek. "You're hungry now, I see," he whispered in my ear.
I choked on my food, knowing his mom had just heard that...and knew exactly what he meant by it. I shot him a glare, my still full cheeks feeling hot. He gave me an innocent expression and I heard Alanna lightly laugh as she walked over to give Jack a kiss. Jack looked up at her laughter, but not understanding it, went back to reading his paper. I took the opportunity to smack Teren in the thigh.
He swiftly kissed my cheek again. "I'm going to get a little snack." He gave me a not so innocent look. "I find myself completely drained this morning."
I rolled my eyes and shook my head as he laughed again and turned to walk into the adjoining kitchen. I watched him leave, his body as lean, muscular and appealing in his worn-in jeans and long sleeve t-shirt, as it had been completely bare, and thought about him drinking in there. It didn't bother me like it used to. Obviously, since I let him do it from me, but, I did worry about him getting enough to eat when we went back home. I knew he'd never hurt anyone, his will power had been tested to the extremes a few weeks ago and he'd proven without a shadow of a doubt that he had an extraordinary level of control, but, I didn't want him to go hungry. I was a mom now too. Well, almost. But those instincts were there and I didn't want him to suffer. It's not like we'd be living on a ranch with plenty of opportunities for him to feed. He'd pretty much have to rely on buying small livestock at farmer's markets. He'd be eating a lot of chickens.
I focused back on my plate and tried not to worry about it. He could always run out here if he got really hungry. The ranch was about an hour from our home - in a car. On foot, Teren could probably make it in fifteen.
Teren was still in the kitchen, and I was halfway though my massive stack of cakes, when something weird happened to me. My stomach started to churn. I set my fork down and pressed a hand on my belly. A horrible, familiar sensation swept through me and I stood up. My head started to swim as well and I started to panic a little bit.
I knew the sensation rising in my stomach and throat - every person over the age of four recognizes it. My stomach was calling a halt to the act of eating, and was now going to "evacuate the pool", so to speak. I looked around, my hand coming up to my mouth to clasp it shut. My mind could only comprehend 'I don't feel good', and I couldn't think past that, to where the damn bathroom was in this massive home. Suddenly getting scared that I'd lose it on the expensive looking dining room table, I started backing up...and lightly crying.
Jack had just started to look up at me, when Teren instantly blurred into the room. His fangs were still out, his teeth slightly red from his breakfast, and his face extremely concerned. "Emma?" I knew he could sense my body's discomfort, but wouldn't know why. He looked a little terrified.
"Bathroom," I squeaked out under my hand. He heard and understood, picking me up and sweeping me down the hall to the other end of the house, where a bathroom fit for a queen was situated. I barely had time to note the stale air of a room that obviously was hardly ever used, before I dashed to the bowl and nosily launched my entire stomach contents into it.
Teren's cool hands came up to my back, feeling like heaven-sent icepacks on my suddenly overheated skin. He pulled aside my hair as I amazingly lost it again, and then he cupped my cheek, cleaning me off with a towel he'd grabbed at some point.
"Thanks," I muttered, as I leaned my face into his cool, wonderful skin.
"You alright?" The concern was thick in his voice and I opened my eyes to look at him. He sat on his knees beside me, looking like he wished he could do more for me. I understood feeling helpless, I had certainly felt that when he'd been horribly injured. Of course, that had been much more serious than morning sickness.
I smiled as my stomach settled and slung my arms around his cool neck, straddling his lap. His arms held me tight and I relaxed into the calming coolness. "Morning sickness," I whispered, loving those words and hating them at the same time. I didn't enjoy throwing up, but I did enjoy the reason I was throwing up. I looked up at him and grinned. "I don't think the kids like pancakes."
He laughed and kissed my forehead, squeezing me a little tighter than he usually did. I must have looked pretty horrible, he still seemed pretty worried. "I'm fine, Teren...all normal pregnancy stuff."
He rested his head against mine and nodded. "I know...I still worry about you though."
I pulled back and put a hand on his cheek, understanding that as well. I constantly worried about him. "I know."
He helped me stand and as we opened the elaborate door handle of the marble and gold leaf decorated room I'd just spewed in, Alanna stepped into the doorway with Teren's grandmother, Imogen, right behind her, cringing a bit in the too bright for her sunlight.
I smiled tiredly at their show of concern. "I'm fine," I immediately said, feeling a little stupid at everyone jumping up because I got sick. "Imogen, go rest upstairs, please. You shouldn't be down here. I'm fine, really."
Imogen didn't look to buy my bravado. "Are you sure, dear? Is there anything we can do for you?" She wrung her hands as her face winced. The light in the hallway had been subdued with heavy curtains, most likely thanks to Alanna, but it was still causing the vampire pain.
To reassure her, and a nervous looking Alanna beside her, I quickly muttered that I was fine again and threw on a tired smile. With Teren supporting my elbow and helping me walk through the door, like I was partially invalid, I thought I probably looked pretty pathetic. Wanting them to feel okay about me, I straightened and stepped away from him. He made to reach for me, but I gave him a warning glance. He understood and let me be, knowing I was no damsel in distress that needed my hand held because I'd gotten a little woozy.
Alanna and Imogen looked a little better as I walked as confidently from the room as I could, but I was feeling a little dehydrated and my hands shook a bit. They both followed me back to the dining room, Alanna darkening the room for her mom and Jack looking up at the assemblage parading me back to the table, most likely wondering what all the fuss was about. While I went from standing to sitting, Alanna swept away my plate and came back with a tall glass of water. I downed it, wishing they'd all stop worrying, but understanding why they were. What I carried was important, as important as a child was to anyone, but also important, because I carried the last of their line. Teren's dead body could no longer contribute to the making of new life, and these children would be the last I ever carried of his, the last I ever carried, period. If I lost them...
I couldn't even think about that.
After my water, my color came back and with reassuring pats and belly rubs, the vampire women finally left me alone. Teren squatted in front of me, his hands on my cheeks again as his sky blue eyes searched mine. "Let's go home," he whispered. I nodded into his hands, thinking that was the best plan I'd heard all morning.
Chapter 2 Back to the Real World
After a couple more large glasses of water, followed by a couple more visits to that impressive bathroom - the regular kinds of visits, not the upchuck kind - I felt like myself again. Teren stuck close to my side, his eyes rarely leaving me. The concerned look in his brow never really left him either, even when I sat at the table, making small talk with his father, both of us laughing over one of Teren's childhood tales.
A few minutes later, he excused himself to pack the car. A couple of minutes after that, when he was done, he came back for me, insisting that he should take me home so I could rest. I rolled my eyes and smirked at him, since I felt one hundred percent fine, but grudgingly agreed, since I did have unpacking and washing and mail and bills and phone calls and ugh...maybe I would just lie on the couch.
With swift hugs for Jack, Alanna and Imogen, and apologies that we couldn't stay to say goodbye to a sleeping Halina, we made our way to Teren's Prius and began the bumpy journey down their super long gravel driveway.
It felt odd to be leaving, especially since I hadn't even been in a car in nearly two months. I flashed on the last time I'd been in a car, Teren's car even, but immediately pushed it aside. I didn't want to connect Teren's vehicle to that awful event. I didn't want to be reminded of it every time we went somewhere.
As we pulled onto the highway that led home, I sighed contently and put my hand on Teren's thigh. He placed his hand over mine and laced our fingers together. Even though the move was a tender one, I felt the rigid way he held my hand. If I didn't know any better, I'd say it was almost protective, or possessive.
I brought my other hand over to lay it on top of his, making a Teren hand-sandwich. "You alright?" I asked as I clamped our skin together.
He looked over at me, a tight smile on his lips. "Sure, I'm fine."
As he looked back to the road, I could see the tension in his jaw and neck; whatever he really was, it was not 'fine'. "Teren..."
My tone clearly indicated that I didn't buy his answer and wanted the truth. He sighed and looked over at me again. His eyes watered as he stared at me and I scrunched my brow at seeing his emotion start to bubble up. He shook his head, just a little. "What if something happens to you?"
I scrunched my brow even further, not making the conversational leap with him. Seeing my confusion he explained himself better, his eyes drifting back to the road, still looking sad and worried. "Pregnancy is hard...some women don't make it..."
Understanding, my hand went to his cheek, bringing his eyes back to mine. Knowing his vampiric reflexes could handle driving without both eyes on the road, I made him meet my gaze. "I will be fine. This morning was completely normal." I couldn't help but note the contradiction of me now assuring him that everything was fine, now that we were talking about my safety and not his. Things were different when your concern was for another's life, and not your own.
He nodded, shaking his head free from my grasp and looking away from me again, towards the road that he knew so well, he could probably drive it blindfolded. "I know, Emma. I know today was fine...but what about tomorrow, or the next day?" He shook his head and looked back at me. "There's so much that can go wrong, and I can't... If I lose..." He stopped talking and swallowed painfully, his eyes darting to my stomach and then back up to me.
I swallowed back my own emotion and leaned over to kiss his neck. "I know, Teren. I know." He was terrified of losing any of us. That's the downside of loving someone so much. You throw your heart out there and hope nothing will yank it away and tear it into shreds. He couldn't predict what would happen to me, and he was right, pregnancy wasn't always a cause for celebration...sometimes pregnancies ended badly. But you couldn't go through life waiting for bad things to happen. I'm pretty sure that's how people go mad. I also noted the contradiction in that, and made a mental note to not worry about Teren being exposed so much. Well, I'd try not to.
I rested my head on his shoulder. "Today I'm fine, Teren. Today, we're all fine." I sighed and felt him nod and sigh as well. That's all we had to go on, all any of us had to go on...and it was enough.