But Meredith stepped back, tucking her hands behind her back as if she was afraid to touch the bottle. Her lips were parting to speak, but then Alaric came down the hall. Elena could see from his face that he had overheard, after all.
“Thank you,” he said, and took the bottle from Elena’s hand. “Just in case.”
Elena hugged them both, briefly, and left them alone. She hoped she’d made the right decision. But Elena couldn’t make the choice for them.
It wasn’t the same, Elena knew that now. Not aging, not changing. The idea of living forever without Stefan hurt her, a deep sore ache that never left her for a moment. If she’d known that she’d be without him, she wouldn’t have drunk the waters. She would have chosen to live a normal life, to grow old, to grow up, to die.
But things would be different for Meredith and Alaric. And if Elena and Damon could find out Siobhan’s secrets, if they could somehow find a cure for this artificial vampirism that infected Meredith, they would never have to make that choice. Meredith and Alaric would both be human again and could grow old together. She knew that was what Meredith would choose, if she had the chance.
Elena straightened her shoulders and walked more swiftly down the hall, the heels of her boots clicking determinedly. She didn’t want to leave Meredith’s side, not when she was suffering. But if Elena’s mission was successful, then perhaps Meredith’s suffering could end.
Chapter 20
The street lamps threw pools of light onto the dark sidewalk, and Bonnie and Zander walked from shadow to light to shadow, hand in hand. The day had been hot, but in the fifteen minutes or so since they’d left Meredith and Alaric’s apartment, it had gotten chilly. It felt like it was going to rain, and Bonnie shivered.
She snuck a peek at Zander out of the corner of her eye as they went, but his face was shadowed, the lights shining off his white-blond hair, and she couldn’t read him.
“Poor Meredith,” she said, hesitantly. Why did she feel so awkward talking to him suddenly? This was Zander.
“Mmm-hmm,” Zander said, not looking at her. He was gazing straight ahead, intently, a tiny crease between his eyebrows, as if he was thinking hard.
He’d barely said anything at Meredith’s, hanging back when he should have been participating, helping. She opened her mouth to say something—anything—and closed it again. She squeezed his hand instead, but he didn’t seem to notice.
They turned and began to walk past the botanical gardens toward home. A breeze blew Bonnie’s hair across her face, and the warm smell of summer roses came through the fence, a heavy, seductive scent. It could have been such a romantic moment that tears rose in Bonnie’s eyes. On a night like this, everything should be perfect.
Bonnie stopped dead under a streetlight.
“What is it?” asked Zander, coming to a halt beside her.
“ ‘What is it?’ ” Bonnie mimicked. She was furious suddenly, adrenaline pumping through her. “You’ve been acting like a total weirdo for days! And now you’re not even talking to me?”
Zander blinked. “What?” His face was washed out by the pale light, his gorgeous blue eyes looking gray.
“Don’t you ‘what’ me!” Bonnie snapped. “God, Zander, I thought you were braver than just blowing me off. If you want to break up with me, just do it.” Hot tears were beginning to stream down her cheeks, and she could feel her nose starting to run. She was an ugly, messy crier, and she hated it. “You’re being a jerk,” she said thickly, letting go of Zander’s hand to wipe her eyes with her arm.
“Bonnie—no,” Zander sounded desperate. “I don’t want to break up with you. I—this isn’t the way I planned it.” He took her hand again, tightly, and pulled her farther down the sidewalk, then through the gate to the botanical garden.
The scent of the roses was even stronger here, almost dizzying. Leaves brushed against Bonnie’s arms as Zander led her to a bench beneath an arch of climbing white roses.
“What’s going on?” Bonnie asked, sitting down, wiping at her eyes again. Fallen rose petals dotted the bench, and she flicked some of them off. A soft rumble of thunder came from far away.
Zander dropped to his knees in the dirt at her feet. “I don’t want to break up with you, Bonnie. I want to marry you.”
All the air rushed out of Bonnie’s chest. She opened her mouth to say something, but all she could do was squeak. Yes. Yes.
She reached forward and pulled him toward her. Zander shuffled closer, still on his knees. Their lips met, and a warm thrill shot through her. Here you are. This was the Zander she’d been looking for, his lips quirking into a smile and his eyes wide and loving and fixed on her, seeing her again.
“Wait,” he said, breaking the kiss. “I’ve got—I’ve been carrying it around, waiting for the right time.” He dug in his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box.
It was a ring. An amazingly gorgeous ring, shiny and bright, one big round-cut glittering stone on a golden band. “Will you?” Zander asked, holding it out.
“Okay,” Bonnie said. She was still breathless, but she could speak now, and she was absolutely sure. She was smiling so hard her cheeks hurt. There was nothing she wanted more than to marry Zander. “Okay. I’d love to marry you.”
She was purely, blindingly happy. And behind that white glow of joy was a contented planning hum: have to call my mom, bridesmaids—Elena and Meredith and my sisters all look good in blue, big fluffy white dress.
But Zander didn’t slide the ring onto her finger. He stayed on his knees looking up at her. “I need to tell you something first.” He licked his lips nervously and reached out to take her hand again. “The Pack has to leave Dalcrest. I want you to come with us.”
Bonnie felt her mouth drop into an O of surprise. “What? Come where?”
Running his free hand through his hair, Zander sighed and sat back on his heels. “I’ve tried to find a way out of it. I didn’t want to have to tell you unless it was definite. I appealed to the High Wolf Council, but they said we’d been here a lot longer than they’d originally planned. They’ve cut me a lot of slack because I’m the Alpha and I wanted to stay, but now they say there’s trouble in Colorado and they want us there.”
“There’s trouble here!” Bonnie said indignantly.
“I know. But it’s Pack stuff. In the end, I’m sworn to them, and I have to do what they say. The whole Pack has to go where we’re needed.” He squeezed her hand tightly and looked back up at her, his eyes pleading. “Come with us. Marry me. I don’t want to lose you, Bonnie.”
Bonnie couldn’t breathe. And it wasn’t with the happy surprise of a few moments ago. Instead her throat seemed to be closing up. She felt like she was going to die.
Colorado. Colorado was really far away.
The first tiny drops of rain hit her arms, one cold drop and then another. Wind blew through the rose arch and showered damp white petals down over Bonnie. One hit her face, a delicate blow, and she peeled it off her own cheek, soft and wilted.
It was beginning to rain more steadily, and the cold raindrops loosened Bonnie’s tongue and let her start thinking again. “I can’t. Zander, I can’t.” He was staring at her, his eyelashes wet with rain. “I love you, but how could I leave here with everything that’s going on? Meredith’s a vampire. Stefan’s dead. My friends need me here.”
Zander leaned closer, put a hand on Bonnie’s knee to steady himself. “I need you,” he said softly, almost whispering.
Rain plastered Bonnie’s hair against her forehead and ran down her cheeks, feeling almost like tears. “Please, Zander, I can’t.”
Zander’s eyes closed for a second, long pale eyelashes fanning against his cheeks, and then he opened his eyes, let go of her hand, and stood. “I understand,” he said, his voice flat. “I’ll go tomorrow, okay? I don’t want to make things tense for everybody. Some of the guys can stay and patrol for a few days, until Damon and Elena are back.” Standing above her, he seemed impossibly tall. Bonnie couldn’t get a good look at his face, but his hands were clenched tightly. He backed away from her for a few steps, then turned and headed for the gate out of the botanical gardens, walking slowly with his head down.
Water was running down her arms, soaking her clothes. A white rose petal clung limply to the back of her hand, and Bonnie stared at it numbly, seeing the curve at its base, the line of brown at its edge. There was a terrible ache in her chest. Bonnie realized she was feeling her heart break.
Chapter 21
It had rained all night and through the day, and now it was late afternoon, the cloudy gray sky gradually getting darker. Damon drove his gleaming black car down the highway and let his Power loose around him, trying to sense if anything supernatural lurked in the woods on either side of the road. There was nothing, just the gentle hum of nondescript human minds from the cars on the road and the towns they swept by.
“There’s just a trace,” Elena said from the passenger seat beside him. She leaned forward and peered out through the windshield. “It’s very faint, but I think she kept heading north.”