Alex laughs.
“Bad morning?”
I lower the cup. If I admit it, he might think I can’t handle personal stress after all. And I can’t tell him about my vag problems.
“Um. Just busy already,” I tell him.
“Well, I won’t keep you. I just wanted to tell you that I’ll be sitting in your staff meeting today. I just want to get a feel for your department. No big thing. I just didn’t want you to feel surprised.”
I smile. I’m feeling gracious now that the caffeine is circulating through my veins.
“It’s fine. I expected that you would join us today and obviously, you are welcome any time. Is there anything in particular you want us to cover?”
Alex shakes his sexy head.
“No. Just go on with business as usual. If I have questions, I’ll ask.”
He picks up his paper and takes his leave. He is barely gone before I buzz for Taylor. She walks in and I smile pleasantly.
“Is there any reason why you didn’t mention as I walked past you that our new boss was waiting for me in my office?”
She smiles back like the saucy wench that she is.
“Yes. You said that you weren’t in the mood for it yet.”
I take four deep breaths and mentally pick up my stapler and throw it at her smiling head. She smiles wider, as if she knows my thoughts.
“In the future,” I say calmly, still smiling, “Please let me know when Alex Harris is waiting for me, even if I say that I’m not in the mood to hear it.”
She nods cheerfully. “Will do, boss. Should I also always tell you if you have lipstick on your teeth?”
I nod back. “Of course.”
She smiles. “You do.”
“Son of a bitch!” I snap, as I remember how I had smiled widely at Alex. I rub furiously at my teeth with my finger as a toothbrush. Why, oh why, did I have to wear hot pink lipstick today of all freaking days?
I bare my teeth to her like a horse.
“Is it gone?”
She is nodding exactly at the same time as Alex walks back into my office. He stops short and stares at my horse-mouth, then laughs.
“Oh, good. I see your assistant told you about the lipstick. I wasn’t sure if I should or…” he trails off and I wish that I could melt into the floor.
Taylor slips back out, her skinny shoulders shaking, and I can hear her laughing at her desk. I make a mental note to kill her later. Right after I staple her fingertips to her desk.
I look at Alex. “I’m sorry. It’s been an unusually hectic morning. I forgot to check my lipstick in the car. And yes. To answer your question, any woman would be grateful if you told her that she had lipstick on her teeth. Or about anything else that she has forgotten to check.”
He nods and smiles. “Noted, then. From now on, if I notice something like that, I’ll tell you. I just never know what will offend someone.”
He’s such a warm person. It’s a little surprising since he holds such an important position. But I can tell that he likes to joke and laugh. And I love that kind of person. So combine that with his devastating good looks and I might be in serious trouble here.
“Oh, I don’t offend easily,” I promise him. “Seriously, you can treat me like one of the guys. Just pretend that I don’t have ovaries.”
He raises an eyebrow. “Um, okay. I’ll try that. What I was coming back for, though, was to see if you had a file on our new client, Malochec? I’d like to look through it.”
“Of course,” I tell him. I buzz Taylor and asked her to bring it in. She trots in a couple of minutes later and hands it to me and I pass it to Alex. Our fingers touch and I feel a jolt of imaginary electricity. He looks at me, seemingly oblivious.
“Perfect,” he says. “I’ll see you in a few.”
I gather a few things and then follow him out, making my way to the conference room. I am painfully aware of my raw crotch. Unfortunately, the tea bags’ effect doesn’t last that long. If I could limp without drawing attention to myself, I so would.
As it is, I walk stiffly in and take my normal seat.
Alex sits across from me and I grab a pen to make notes. I start the meeting as I usually do and allow the various managers to speak to their various points, current projects and so on. I squirm uncomfortably in my seat for the duration, spreading my knees slightly to allow the cool air to brush over my girl.
I listen to Jack, Herb, Angela and Marla all speak. I ask if there are any concerns that I need to know about. I silently pray that there isn’t. Everyone shakes their heads. Like me, they just want to go about their business and end this meeting. Not for the same reason, though, I’m sure. So, I smile and turn to Alex.
“Would you like to end the meeting?”
And I’m surprised when I am speaking to his hunched back because he’s digging under the table. I pause and he comes back up with a pen in his hand, his cheeks slightly flushed, probably from being upside down.
“What?” he asks, seemingly flustered.
“I said, would you like to end the meeting?” I repeat politely.
“Oh. Um, no. I have a couple of questions for Herb and Angela, but I’ll come by your offices later in the day. Everyone have a good Thursday!”
Everyone grabs their coffee and their notebooks and makes a mad dash for the door. Except for Alex. He stays put and after everyone else has left, he turns to me. I don’t know what to make of his expression. It’s sort of amused, sort of confused, sort of shocked. I’m intrigued as I wait for him to speak.
“Remember when you said that if you ever forget something again, not to hesitate to tell you, because you wouldn’t get offended?”
I nod, confused. “Yes, since it was just this morning, I do remember that.”
He smiles. “Great. Because you seem to have forgotten your underwear today and I thought you might want to know.”
He picks up his coffee and strolls out of the conference room.
And I seriously want to effing die.
Chapter Ten
(Or: Embarrassment is a wine best served cold)
I storm as quickly as I can back to my office and pick up my phone. I type so fast and furious that it actually hurts my texting finger.