“He hangs out with people who—”
Rosa squeezed his arm, stopping him from finishing his sentence. Carl looked like he was about to throw up his hands. “I’m not trying to upset you, Mallory, but he’s not good—”
“Don’t say it.” I lifted my hand and my finger trembled as I pointed it at them. “He made sure I was safe yesterday and he was there for me before you all even knew I existed. He was the only person there for me, and just because he thinks he’s not cut out for college, you think he’s not worthy?”
“Mallory.” Carl’s eyes widened. “I know Rider has been there for you. I know what he did for you, and I’m not discounting that, but that doesn’t change what happened yesterday. This isn’t just about your past together, or about college. I know the kind of people he spends his time with. I know how these stories end.”
I wasn’t stopping now. A cap had blown off me. Pent-up emotion broke free. Everything that happened yesterday. Everything that had happened the last couple of months, the last four years—an entire lifetime. Tears burned my eyes. “Rider is good people. So is Hector. And so is—so was Jayden. Just because they don’t have money or don’t live in a house like this doesn’t make them bad people.”
“We know that.” Rosa stood, shaking her head. “Neither Carl nor I come from money. You know that. It has nothing to do with money.”
“Then what does it have to do with?”
“He’s not good for you,” Carl repeated.
“Why?” My voice became shrill to my own ears. “Just because I’m not agreeing with everything you all are saying? He’s to blame for that?”
“You saw someone get shot and die because you were with him!” Carl’s voice was as sharp as a blade.
“It’s not his fault!”
“You can make better choices than this, Mallory. Smarter choices,” he argued. “You have your entire life ahead of you, perfectly laid out. Don’t throw it away. Don’t throw away everything, because you’re making a mistake.”
I stiffened. No way did I consider Rider a mistake, but God, I was bound to make mistakes. It was going to happen. I wasn’t perfect.
I wasn’t perfect.
Something deep inside me clicked into place. Rosa and Carl knew I was far from perfect. They had to know I’d make mistakes. That I needed to make them. Wanting to be perfect for them no longer held the same power, because I couldn’t be that. My shoulders straightened. “If it turns out to be a mistake, then...then I’m okay with it.”
Looking away, he rubbed his palm down his face. “We never would have had to have this conversation with Marquette.”
My jaw unhinged as I jerked a step back. Hurt rolled through me, fanning my anger like wind did to a fire. In the four years since they’d taken me into their home and their lives, I’d never heard them say something like that, at least to my face.
“Carl,” gasped Rosa.
“I didn’t ask...” I drew in a shallow breath. “I am not her. I will never be her.”
He lowered his hand and then his head swung to where I stood. The color faded from his face. Regret filled his gaze immediately. “Mallory—”
“I’m not going to make her decisions,” I said, hands shaking, and it all just came out again. “I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in a lab. I don’t want to do anything in the medical field. I’m not perfect like her. I don’t want to be.”
Rosa placed her hand to her chest. “Honey, we—”
Done.
I was so done with this conversation that I didn’t even need words to tell them that. I didn’t need to be lectured right now. I didn’t need to hear anything they were saying. I needed to be with Rider—be there for him, like he’d been there for me so many times in the past. The rightness of that struck me hard.
It was my turn to take care of him and to be the strong one. The one who held it together so he could fall apart a little. I was not going to shatter and rely on anyone to piece me back together.
I was done.
Spinning around, I left the kitchen and darted upstairs. Once inside my bedroom, I slammed the door shut and then whipped off my loose shirt. I threw open a drawer and rooted around until I found a bra and then a tank top. I grabbed a hoodie and pulled it on over my head. I yanked my hair back in a loose knot as I walked over to my bed. Shoving my phone into my bag, I slung it over my shoulder and then pivoted. I headed out of my bedroom as I dug my keys out.
I took the steps two at a time and when I hit the foyer, Rosa appeared. “He didn’t mean it.”
“It doesn’t matter.” I walked straight to the door.
She followed. “Where are you going?”
“Out,” I replied, my heart racing.
“Mallory—”
Opening the door, I stopped in the doorway and faced her. “I need to be there for him. Hector and Jayden are like brothers to him.” Cold air washed over me and rolled into the house. “I need to go.”
“You can’t—”
“I need to go.” My hand tightened on the knob as Carl appeared in the background. “I’m going.”
Then I did.
I left the house knowing that Carl and Rosa didn’t approve, knowing I was going to be in trouble.
Knowing that I was letting them down.
That I already had.
* * *
I’d tried Rider again, but the call went straight to his voice mail and the text I sent him didn’t show delivered. I knew that most likely meant his cell was turned off. I tried not to let myself freak over that too much, because I was freaking about Carl and Rosa.