“What about you?”
“I think I’m going to head to their aunt’s house. I want to be there today. I know they’re going to start the whole funeral process.”
The weight of grief returned. It wasn’t like we’d forgotten about Jayden, but the pain had lessened during those brief moments. Feeling like I’d woken from a dream, I nodded. “If I’m lucky, the school hasn’t called home yet. Carl and Rosa are already ticked off enough at me.”
His brows lowered. “Why?”
It was hard keeping my gaze fixed on his face when he was sort of, kind of naked. I’d looked my fill, but I wanted to look more.
“Mallory?” He chuckled.
I was looking and I needed to focus. My cheeks heated. “They got pretty mad after I told them what happened Saturday.”
The grin slowly slipped off his face. “That’s understandable.”
“Not really,” I told him. “They...want me to stop seeing you.”
His brows lifted as he sat up and swung his legs over the bed. He looked at the door, jaw hard. “Really?”
“Yeah, I got into a fight with Carl and Rosa,” I explained as he rose, pulling up his boxers, and for a moment I got distracted by the stiff muscles along his spine. “What happened to Jayden wasn’t your fault.”
“But you saw that go down because I brought you to that house.” He swiped his jeans off the floor and then pulled them on. “That much is true.”
I disagreed. “You didn’t know that was going to happen.”
Rider faced me, and I realized he held my bra. I flushed as he handed it over. “That doesn’t change what happened.” He looked away as I put it on. “How bad did the fight get?”
“I left the house. That’s when I went looking for you.” Scooting to the edge of the bed, I found my sweater and pulled it on over my head. When I stood, it fell to my thighs. “They were...just overreacting.”
His gaze swung back to me and then did a slow slide, causing my toes to curl against the thin carpet. He didn’t say anything as I found my jeans and pulled them on. I sat on the edge of the bed, worrying my lower lip as he finished dressing. “They just don’t understand. It’s like they expect me to make all these choices—choices they would make, choices Marquette would make, and I’m not them. I’m not her.”
“They know you’re not her.” Rider walked toward the bed, stopping. I grinned when I saw his bare feet peeking out from the hem of his jeans. “They just want what’s best for you.”
“I know.” I looked up at him. “Carl... He did say something that I really never thought he’d say. He said to Rosa that this—the whole fighting thing—was something he didn’t have to worry about with Marquette.”
“Shit,” Rider muttered, running his hands through his hair. “He didn’t mean that, Mouse.”
I shrugged. Maybe he did. I’d been pretty malleable the last four years. “I never...I never disagreed with them over anything, you know. I owe them so much, so I always agreed with whatever they wanted. Whatever they thought best. Like they’ve been pushing this whole med school thing, and I don’t want to do that. But I agreed to look at these pamphlets anyway. I don’t even know why. I think I want...”
“You want what?”
“I think I want to go into social work.” I waited for him to laugh. He didn’t. I sat a little straighter. “It’s something that makes sense to me. I could help people like you and me, but Carl had laughed and asked if I was being serious. He said I wouldn’t make any money.”
“Not everything is about money.”
“Exactly.”
“Money helps, though.” He paused. “Carl seems like a good man. He was angry. People say stupid crap when they’re mad.” A muscle throbbed in his jaw. “But I...”
“What?” I asked when he didn’t finish.
Rider opened his mouth and then shook his head. “We should get back to school. I don’t want you to get into any more trouble.”
I slid off the bed and found my socks. When I was finished, Rider was pulling a skull cap on. Tufts of hair curled along the edges. He was silent as we headed downstairs and out to my car.
Little balls of unease had formed in my stomach. I turned the ignition key and looked over at him. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah. Everything’s fine.” He looked over at me. “Can you drop me off at their aunt’s? It’s on the way to school.”
I studied him for a moment and then nodded. I needed to stop being paranoid, I told myself as I followed his directions to the aunt’s house. Once there, I got out of the car and Rider met me on my side. He placed his hands on my cheeks and slid his thumbs along my jaw. Lowering his head, he kissed me softly, tenderly—a long kiss, one that left me breathless.
I didn’t know what it was, but something about the kiss felt different than the ones we’d shared earlier. Something about it felt a little sad.
Chapter 35
As soon as I walked through the door, Rosa pounced. “Sit.” All but dragging me into the kitchen, she gestured at a chair. Two mugs were waiting on the table, and I could smell the stick of cinnamon she always liked to place in her tea.
Taking a deep breath, I did just as she ordered. I didn’t think the school had called since I’d made it to most of my classes, and I wasn’t about to ask. As I waited for her to speak, I couldn’t help but think the morning with Rider felt like forever ago. I was looking forward to reliving every detail when I next talked to Ainsley—I’d texted her earlier and it was a miracle her eruption of squees hadn’t broken my phone.