What was going on here? What was happening to him? How did she know what he was going through? It seemed so unreal to him to finally meet someone who knew what it was like to feel pain of the inner kind.
“I’ve finished.”
The sandwich was gone, the plate empty apart from a few crumbs. He continued to hold onto her arm.
“Who are you?”
“You know my name.”
“I’m not talking about your name. I’m talking about this.” He pointed at their hands. The way she knew how to bring him out of the pain.
“Someone who knows what you’re going through,” she said.
Frowning, he gazed down at where he held her. With his grip on her arm, he’d bunched the jacket up her wrist. The ink covered her hands, working up her arms. Turning her hand over, he saw the signs of her own pain. One faded scar ran up the inside of her wrist. Kelsey had tried to kill herself in the same way when the pain got too bad. Why did Lacey want to hurt herself? Nothing was making sense to him. Why did this woman have to turn up in his life now when he wasn’t ready for her?
“What did you do?” he asked, glancing back up at her.
There was no emotion on her face as she stared at him.
“I had to end the pain. Sometimes we can’t control what happens to us, but we can change what we do.”
Running his thumb over the raised scar, he heard her gasp. “Did it help?”
“No, it didn’t help. It just made me realize how much I wanted to live but be different. Trying to end my life was a mistake. I wasn’t winning by trying to take the pain away. They were winning whereas now I’m the one that’s winning.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m still living my life. No one is taking it off me.”
For several seconds neither of them said anything.
“Who are you? I’ve never seen you before,” he said.
She let out a sigh. “Someone you shouldn’t want to know.” She pulled away from him. He wanted to continue holding her, but she pulled away. “I’ve got to go.”
Whizz didn’t fight her as she started to pull away from him. He watched her leave the café running off in the opposite direction.
Follow her.
He didn’t follow her. Staying sat in the café, he watched as Mandy walked toward him. She placed another sandwich in front of him then walked off without saying another word.
Who the f**k was Lacey?
****
Closing the door behind her, Lacey charged up to her bedroom.
“Lacey, are you okay?” Dalton asked.
“I’m fine.” She didn’t turn around to look at him. He always saw too much when it came to her, and she didn’t want to share this with him.
Shutting the rest of the Savage Brothers out, she flicked the lock into place and walked straight into the bathroom. Removing the jacket that covered her body she stared at her reflection.
Blowing out a breath, she ran fingers through her hair trying to calm her nerves. No one had touched her or caressed her like Whizz had to her wrist.
Staring down at her wrist she looked at the raised scar from years ago. It was over fifteen years old. She’d been attacked at ten years old, her innocence torn from her along with the beating. Five years later she’d tried to move on, tried to have a boyfriend and pretend for once that her life wasn’t miserable or scary.
Instead, she’d not been able to accept a guy holding her hand or giving her a kiss. The only person she allowed to touch her was Dalton, but he was like a brother to her. Closing her eyes, she felt her heart beating rapidly against her chest.
Fifteen years ago, the pain of knowing she couldn’t move on with anyone had forced her to reach for a knife. Everyone had been out of the house, and Dalton had been working at the local mechanic shop. Standing at the sink, she had pressed the blade into her skin and let the blood ooze out.
Dalton found her, rescuing her in time before she’d been killed. For three months she was in the psych ward talking with the doctors assigned to her case.
Afterward, Dalton wouldn’t allow her out of his sight. It had taken some time for him to get over her trying to take her life. She’d gone from harming herself to covering her body with ink. Each piece of ink was a relief to her and a reward. She sat down while a man or woman inked her body. The experience always stressed her out, but she did it.
“Lacey?” Dalton called her name through the door. She left the bathroom door open so she was able to hear him talking.
“What?” she asked.
Looking at her reflection she saw the scar in her shoulder from the stab wound she’d gotten when she was younger.
Her body had a lot of scars from what happened. She couldn’t have kids because of the rape, and her life had been over for so long.
“What’s going on with you? Danny’s worried.”
The only thing Danny was worried about was getting the chance to take out his revenge on Gonzalez. Anything else that mattered to the club, Danny didn’t give a shit about.
“I’m fine. You’ve all got nothing to worry about.”
She turned the tap on and splashed cold water onto her face.
“Lacey, open up and talk to me.”
Closing her eyes, she started to lose her temper. Grabbing a towel, she stormed to the door. Flicking the lock, she opened the door. “What?” she asked.
“Where have you been going?”
“Out. I don’t like being cooped up in the same place. We can’t hit out at Gonzalez as he’s not in town. I went to get some fresh air. Is that okay?” she asked.
“Something’s going on with you. You’re not acting yourself.”
Glancing at the floor, Lacey wondered what she should say to him.
“Talk to me. I don’t like it when you go quiet on me.” He made to walk into her room, but she held her hand up.
“No, I don’t want you inside my room,” she said.
“What’s going on?”
“I don’t think we should be using Butch. It’s wrong, and it makes us no different from Gonzalez.” She let the words spill out of her lips.
“Is this you talking or the fact you’ve been talking with Whizz?”
“How do you know?”
“You’re not the only one who can go out at night or leave during the day. We’re not some f**king vampires, Lacey. I can follow you if I want.”
She shoved him hard. “You’ve got no respect for my privacy.”
“I’m the one who respects your privacy, Lacey. I was concerned about you, and I followed through with my instinct to follow you,” Dalton said.