“I’ll tell him.”
I watched her walk to the darkened kitchen doorway as I stroked Gun.
Her shadow didn’t disappear through it. It stopped and I knew she was turning back to me.
“One last thing, Sylvie. When I leave, I want you to think about your life right now. I know you like it. I know you’ve got people close to you. I know you have fun. But I want you to think of your happiest memory, the happiest in your whole life. Then I want you to compare it to the life you live now without Tucker Creed. My guess, your happiest memory includes him. My guess, even with that shit between you, you give it a shot, you’ll go from the life you live now, that you like, to something else. Something bigger, richer, better, happier. And you know it. You’re just scared to lose it because you lost it once. Then, after all that, think about what your life would be if he was never in it. You’d never met. He’d never touched it. Then, honey, ask yourself how you would feel if you didn’t have those moments. Last, I hope you’ll come to the realization that, this time around, you’re making the deliberate choice not to take a chance in order to have that beauty.”
I stared at the shadowed door long after her silhouette left it but I didn’t see dark shadows. I saw sunny days, the lake, the pier, blankets over grass, young bodies rolling on them, tangled, twin beds in dark rooms that barely fit two bodies, whispered conversations, holding close.
My hands curled around Gun as my legs uncurled from the chair. I set my feet on the floor as I cuddled her close and walked through my dark house to my bedroom. I didn’t bother with a light. I just dropped Gun gently on my bed and dug through my clothes on the floor until I found my jeans from last night.
I dug my phone out of the back pocket.
I flipped it open and the light from the screen made me wince.
I went to my phonebook, scrolled down and hit go.
I put it to my ear as my eyes went to the clock on my nightstand.
It was one seventeen in the morning.
The phone rang once.
“Sylvie,” Creed greeted, sounding alert but growly.
“I’m ready,” I whispered.
Silence.
Then, “I’ll be there in ten.”
Disconnect.
I flipped my phone shut.
Fuck.
Chapter Ten
My Sylvie
A warm, late summer day in Kentucky, twenty-two years earlier, Creed is seventeen, Sylvie is eleven, one day away from being twelve…
I got off my bike, leaned it against the wall, walked down the side of the building, pulled open the door, walked into the frozen milk stand and saw him right away.
Creed with his girlfriend, Natalie.
My stomach started hurting.
I began to turn around real quick but he was laughing, his head moved and he caught sight of me.
“Hey, Sylvie.”
I gave a stupid wave then turned around and walked out the door.
But I ran to my bike.
I pulled it from the wall and started to get on when I heard, “Hey! Yo! Wait!”
I looked up and saw Creed’s long legs were bringing him to me.
He was so beautiful.
As he got closer, my head went back, back until he stopped in front of me.
“You not gettin’ any ice cream?” he asked.
I shook my head. “No. I forgot. I gotta get home. The stepmonster is taking me shopping for my birthday.”
This wasn’t totally a lie. She was supposed to. She just hadn’t got out of bed yet.
“Right,” he muttered then grinned. “We on for the lake tomorrow?”
No way. He’d probably want to bring Natalie.
I shook my head. “Sorry, I should have… I forgot to tell you. I’m going over to my friend’s house tomorrow. All day slumber party.”
His head jerked to the side and his voice was quiet when he reminded me, “We always meet at the lake for your birthday, Sylvie.”
“I’ll meet you the day after but I can’t stay long.”
“Come in the mornin’, before you go to your friend’s, just real quick,” he urged.
“I… I can’t. I’m going over there early.”
“Then I’ll meet you earlier.”
“I –”
“Creed! You gonna buy me a cone or what?”
He twisted around to look behind him and I leaned to the side to look around him. I saw Natalie outside the door, one hand holding it open, one hand on her hitched hip. Her long, tanned legs on show in her short-shorts. Her big boobs making the material of her tight t-shirt stretch.
“In a second,” Creed called back.
I was so intent on my study of the beautiful, tall, brunette Natalie and wishing I had brown hair and long legs and big boobs that I didn’t notice him turn back to me.
“Hey,” he said softly and my eyes shot to him.
Then I quickly dropped my head and moved closer to my bike, mumbling, “Gotta go.”
“Hey,” he said it softly again and, slowly, my eyes lifted to him. When my eyes met his beautiful blue ones, he whispered, “You’ll always be my girl.”
He was just being nice.
I’d stopped being his girl a couple years ago. He had other ones now. Lots of them. Natalie was just the newest one.
I bit my lip and looked away, trying real hard not to cry.
“Hey,” he whispered and I didn’t want to, I could see the wet swimming in my eyes but I pulled in a breath and looked back at him to find him closer and leaning down toward me. “You’ll always be my Sylvie. Yeah?”
I sucked in a breath and nodded.
“Come to the lake. I’ll meet you early,” he ordered.
I nodded again.
He grinned, lifted a hand and touched the green stone hanging at my neck.
“Gotta give my Sylvie her necklace.”
“Okay, Creed,” I whispered.
He pulled only an inch away but stopped and whispered, “It’s always you and me.”
I nodded again and felt my lips quivering.
He kept whispering, “Always me and my Sylvie, yeah?”
“Yeah,” I whispered back.
He lifted a hand and tucked my hair behind my ear. “Careful ridin’ home.”
“’Kay, Creed.”
“See you tomorrow.”
“’Kay.”
“Later.”
“Bye.”
I got on my bike.
He strode back to the frozen milk stand.
I cried all the way home.
Chapter Eleven
We Win
Present day…
“Sylvie?”
I stood completely still, the roaring in my ears deafening, my eyes opened but blinded, every nerve in my body vibrating like I was receiving way too many volts but my lips moved.