Understanding dawned, my body relaxed, and I whispered, “Deacon.”
“Do anything for you. Do anything for you and like it. Do anything for you that you want and nearly beg for it. You wanted my ass, I gave it to you. I’ll give it to you again. No one, woman, no one I’d give that to. Except you.”
“I—”
“I trusted you and you gave it to me good.”
“Yes,” I agreed quietly.
“You trust me and I give it to you good.”
I pressed my lips together but nodded my head once.
“You want more?” he asked.
I wasn’t sure what he meant, but even so, I didn’t know if I could take more, whatever it was.
My head decided for me and nodded again.
“You got all of me, woman. You just took the last I had to give. I’ve fucked your ass, and essentially, you just fucked mine. Now I’m lyin’ on you, filled with the plug you drove deep ’cause that’s what you wanted and I gave it to you. You got off, fuckin’ huge. You got me off, arguably bigger. You gonna want that again?”
Absolutely.
“Yes,” I breathed.
“Then I’ll give it to you. I’ll give it to you and love every minute of it. No boundaries. That’s us, Cassidy. That’s who we are. That’s what we were both searchin’ for. That’s what you gave me. That’s what you wanted from me. That’s the way it has to be. That’s what started on your kitchen table. Everything I was holding back came loose and I gave you Deacon on that table and you wanted it. You wanted me. That’s why I needed for you to call me Deacon ’cause I was holdin’ on to that, holdin’ on to givin’ me to you, free of the garbage that was suffocating me. Suddenly feeling clean with my Cassie. Then, the next fuckin’ day, I fucked it up, settin’ boundaries. Now they’re gone.”
Oh my God.
Was he saying…?
He lifted one of his big hands and rested it at the side of my head as he dipped his face close to mine. “In this bed, out of it. Naked or not. No boundaries. All in. Nothin’ held back.” He pressed his hips between my legs and I drew in a sharp breath. “You’re all mine, Cassidy, every fuckin’ inch. And I’m all yours, just the same. Do you understand me?”
This was too big, too amazing, too precious to process, but it forced itself into my head and settled there all the same.
Name’s Deacon Gates.
Gates.
Not John Priest.
He gave that to me.
And he gave it to Milagros.
All in.
Nothing held back.
No boundaries.
I understood him.
Completely.
“Yes,” I repeated.
“Do you agree with me?”
I felt tears sting my eyes as I replied, “Yes, honey.”
“You’re mine.”
I nodded.
“I’m yours.”
I nodded again.
He pressed the pads of his fingers in and dipped his face even closer. “It’s a beautiful war, baby.” He dipped so close, the tips of our noses brushed but his eyes never left mine. “And I…just…won.”
Looking into his eyes as he said those words, that’s when I started crying.
He pulled away an inch and let me, his thumb circling my temple, catching the tears because they were there, but only because of that. Mostly, he just let them fall.
I did too.
Deacon let me cry for a while before he was done with it.
And I knew he was done when he asked, “Can I take that as your surrender?”
“Doesn’t feel much like surrendering,” I told him quietly.
His lips quirked and he replied, “Then I’ll take that as your surrender.”
My eyes slid to the side on my “Whatever.”
“Cassie?”
I looked back to him.
“Baby, you got work to do,” he informed me.
“Sorry?”
“Shocked as shit, it feels good, but it’s gotta go, and I want your mouth wrapped around my cock when you pull it out.”
His words made me squirm underneath him.
“Fuck, she likes it up the ass any way she can get it.”
My eyes narrowed. “You said you liked it too.”
He put pressure on my head with his hand until it turned and then he put his lips to my ear.
“Let you plug me before I bind you and I’ll work you full. You up for that?”
I squirmed again.
Deacon kissed my neck and said there, “She’s up for that.”
“I’m really not in the mood for teasing, Deacon,” I informed the pillow.
“Good,” he returned, releasing me so I could right my head and catch his eyes. “’Cause I’m in the mood for my Cassie to wrap her sweet mouth around my dick again, doin’ it this time unplugging my ass, but want her to keep goin’ until she sucks me off.”
My brows drew together. “You just came.”
“Then you got your work laid out, woman. But I’ll make it worth it, you do that sittin’ on my face.”
And it happened again.
I squirmed.
Deacon grinned.
At the sight of it, I couldn’t help it.
I missed it.
And there it was, back.
I wrapped him in all four limbs.
He knew what that meant. He told me with his eyes. Then he dipped his head and took my mouth, giving my tongue a light stroke with his before he lifted his head again.
“Like you wrapped around me, baby. But want your mouth and your pussy, so get a move on, yeah?”
I stared into his beautiful, tawny eyes, taking them in, knowing I’d never forget the look in them, and knowing right then from what was shining out of them, I’d never have to.
Then I said, “Whatever.”
“Cassidy?”
“What?” I snapped, but my heart wasn’t in it. I was just being ornery.
“Heart and soul, gut and balls, I love you. There’s no one I’d rather hold. Not until I’m eighty. Not until the day I die.”
I kept staring at him a beat before I burst out crying again, (though the last time I didn’t burst, this time I definitely did).
Deacon rolled off me, gathering me in his arms and holding my face in his throat while I did it.
When the tears quieted, but didn’t subside, I felt his words stir the top of my hair.
“Do you love me too, my Cassie?”
My Cassie.
“Heart and soul, belly and womb, I love you too, Deacon.”
His hand at my head and arm around me got so tight, they caused pain.