"You see?" He laughed breathlessly, exultantly.
"Yes. But-well, do you have any idea how hard it would be to try and take off a dragon's horns?"
"No, and I don't care. Keller, stop it, stop trying to dampen this! The point is, we found it. We know something about dragons that can hurt them. We know how to fight!"
Keller couldn't help it. His exhilaration was infectious. All at once, all the bottled-up emotions inside her started to come out. She squeezed his arm back, half laughing and half crying.
"You did it," she said. "You found the part."
'It was on your scroll. You were just about to get there."
"You were the one who suggested we look at the scrolls in the first place."
"You were the one-" Suddenly, he broke off. He had been looking at her, laughing, their faces only inches apart as they congratulated each other in whispers. His eyes were like the woods in summertime, golden-green with darker green motes in them that seemed to shift in the light.
But now something hike pain crossed his face. He was still looking at her, still gripping her arm, but his eyes went bleak.
"You're the one," he said quietly.
Keller had to brace herself. Then she said, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Yes, you do."
He said it so simply, so flatly. There was almost no way to argue.
Keller found one. "Look, Galen, if this is about what happened in the library-"
"At least you're admitting that something happened now."
"-then I don't know what's wrong with you. We're both shapeshifters, and there was a minute when we sort of lost our objectivity. We're under a lot of stress. We had a moment of... physical attraction. It happens, when you do a job like this; you just can't take it seriously."
He was staring at her. "Is that what you've convinced yourself happened? 'A moment of physical attraction?'"
The truth was that Keller had almost convinced herself that nothing had happened-or convinced her mind, anyway.
"I told you," she said, and her voice was harsher than she'd heard it for a long time. "Love is for weak people. I'm not weak, and I don't plan to let anything make me weak. And, besides, what is your problem? You've already got a fiancée. Diana's brave and kind and beautiful, and she's going to be very, very powerful. What more could you want?"
"You're right," Galen said. "She's all those things. And I respect her and admire her-I even love her. Who could help loving her? But I'm not in love with her. I'm-"
"Don't say it." Keller was angry now, which was good. It made her strong. "What kind of prince would put his personal happiness above the fate of his people? Above the fate of the whole freaking world, for that matter?"
"I don't!" he raged back. He was speaking softly, but it was still a rage, and he was a little bit frightening. His eyes blazed a deep and endless green. "I'm not saying I won't go through with the ceremony. All I'm saying is that it's you I love. You're my soulmate, Keller. And you know it."
Soulmate. The word hit Keller and ricocheted, clunking inside her as it made its way down. When it hit bottom, it settled into a little niche made especially for it, fitting exactly.
It was the word to describe what had really happened in the library. No stress-induced moment of physical attraction and no simple romantic flirtation, either. It was the soulmate principle.
She and Galen were soulmates.
And it didn't matter a bit, because they could never be together.
Chapter 14
Keller put her hands to her face. At first, she didn't recognize what was happening to her. Then she realized that she was crying.
She was shaking, Raksha Keller who wasn't afraid of anyone and who never let her heart be touched. She was making those ridiculous little noises that sounded like a six-week-old kitten. She was dripping tears through her fingers.
The worst thing was that she couldn't seem to make herself stop.
Then she felt Galen's arms around her, and she realized that he was crying, too.
He was better at it than she was. He seemed more used to it and didn't fight it as hard, which made him stronger. He was able to stroke her hair and even to get some words out.
"Keller, I'm sorry. Keller... can I call you Raksha?"
Keller shook her head furiously, spraying teardrops.
"I always think of you as Keller, anyway. It's just-you, somehow. I'm sorry about all of this. I didn't mean to make you cry. It would be better if you'd never met me..."
Keller found herself shaking her head again. And then, just as she had the last time, she felt her arms moving to hold him back. She pressed her face against the softness of his sweatshirt, trying to get enough control of herself to speak.
This was the problem with having walls so hard and high and unscalable, she supposed. When they came down, they crumbled completely, shattering into nothingness. She felt utterly defenseless right now.
Unguarded... vulnerable... but not alone. She could feel more than Galen's physical presence. She could feel his spirit, and she was being pulled toward it. They were falling together, falling into each other, as they had in the library. Closer and closer...
Contact.
She felt the touch of his mind, and once again her heart almost exploded.
You're the one. You're my soulmate, his mental voice said, as if this were an entirely new idea, and he was just discovering it and rejoicing in it.
Keller reached for denial, but it simply wasn't around. And she couldn't pretend to someone who shared her thoughts.
When I first saw you, he said, I was so fascinated
by you. I already told you this, didn't I? It made me proud to be a shapeshifter for the first time. Aren't you proud?