"I'm going to love her someday, Jazz. I'll be very put out with you if you don't let her be."
I was still locked into Alice's thoughts. I saw the future shimmer as Jasper's resolve floundered in the face of her unexpected request.
"Ah," she sighed - his indecision had cleared a new future. "See? Bella's not going to say anything. There's nothing to worry about."
The way she said the girl's name...like they were already close confidants... "Alice," I choked. "What...does this...?"
"I told you there was a change coming. I don't know, Edward." But she locked her jaw, and I could see that there was more. She was trying not to think about it; she was focusing very hard on Jasper suddenly, though he was too stunned to have progressed much in his decision making.
She did this sometimes when she was trying to keep something from me. "What, Alice? What are you hiding?"
I heard Emmett grumble. He always got frustrated when Alice and I had these kinds of conversations.
She shook her head, trying to not let me in.
"Is it about the girl?" I demanded. "Is it about Bella?"
She had her teeth gritted in concentration, but when I spoke Bella's name, she slipped. Her slip only lasted the tiniest portion of a second, but that was long enough. "NO!" I shouted. I heard my chair hit the floor, and only then realized I was on my feet.
"Edward!" Carlisle was on his feet, too, his arm on my shoulder. I was barely aware of him.
"It's solidifying," Alice whispered. "Every minute you're more decided.
There're really only two ways left for her. It's one or the other, Edward." I could see what she saw...but I could not accept it.
"No," I said again; there was no volume to my denial. My legs felt hollow, and I had to brace myself against the table.
"Will somebody please let the rest of us in on the mystery?" Emmett complained. "I have to leave," I whispered to Alice, ignoring him.
"Edward, we've already been over that," Emmett said loudly. "That's the best way to start the girl talking. Besides, if you take off, we won't know for sure if she's talking or not. You have to stay and deal with this."
"I don't see you going anywhere, Edward," Alice told me. "I don't know if you can leave anymore." Think about it, she added silently. Think about leaving.
I saw what she meant. Yes, the idea of never seeing the girl again was...painful.
But it was also necessary. I couldn't sanction either future I'd apparently condemned her to.
I'm not entirely sure of Jasper, Edward, Alice went on. If you leave, if he thinks she's a danger to us...
"I don't hear that," I contradicted her, still only halfway aware of our audience. Jasper was wavering. He would not do something that would hurt Alice.
Not right this moment. Will you risk her life, leave her undefended? "Why are you doing this to me?" I groaned. My head fell into my hands. I was not Bella's protector. I could not be that. Wasn't Alice's divided future enough proof of that?
I love her, too. Or I will. It's not the same, but I want her around for that. "Love her, too?" I whispered, incredulous.
She sighed. You are so blind, Edward. Can't you see where you're headed?
Can't you see where you already are? It's more inevitable than the sun rising in the east. See what I see...
I shook my head, horrified. "No." I tried to shut out the visions she revealed to me. "I don't have to follow that course. I'll leave. I will change the future." "You can try," she said, her voice skeptical.
"Oh, come on!" Emmett bellowed.
"Pay attention," Rose hissed at him. "Alice sees him falling for a human! How classically Edward!" She made a gagging sound.
I scarcely heard her.
"What?" Emmett said, startled. Then his booming laugh echoed through the room. "Is that what's been going on?" He laughed again. "Tough break, Edward."
I felt his hand on my shoulder, and I shook it off absently. I couldn't pay attention to him.
"Fall for a human?" Esme repeated in a stunned voice. "For the girl he saved today? Fall in love with her?"
"What do you see, Alice? Exactly," Jasper demanded.
She turned toward him; I continued to stare numbly at the side of her face.
"It all depends on whether he is strong enough or not. Either he'll kill her himself" - she turned to meet my gaze again, glaring - "which would really irritate me, Edward, not to mention what it would do to you - " she faced Jasper again, "or she'll be one of us someday."
Someone gasped; I didn't look to see who.
"That's not going to happen!" I was shouting again. "Either one!"
Alice didn't seem to hear me. "It all depends," she repeated. "He may be just strong enough not to kill her - but it will be close. It will take an amazing amount of control," she mused. "More even than Carlisle has. He may be just strong enough...
The only thing he's not strong enough to do is stay away from her. That's a lost cause." I couldn't find my voice. No one else seemed to be able to either. The room was still.
I stared at Alice, and everyone else stared at me. I could see my own horrified expression from five different viewpoints.
After a long moment, Carlisle sighed.
"Well, this...complicates things."
"I'll say," Emmett agreed. His voice was still close to laughter. Trust Emmett to find the joke in the destruction of my life.
"I suppose the plans remain the same, though," Carlisle said thoughtfully. "We'll stay, and watch. Obviously, no one will...hurt the girl."