"It's not meaningless," Jacob muttered, "don't underestimate it."
We passed Angela Weber, lingering on the sidewalk, discussing an assignment with a boy from her Trigonometry class. I scanned her thoughts perfunctorily, expecting more disappointment, only to be surprised by their wistful tenor.
Ah, so there was something Angela wanted. Unfortunately, it wasn't something that could be easily gift-wrapped.
"She must like the guy," Bella said.
"This should be interesting," Jacob chuckled.
"It will only work if the guy likes her back though," Bella said.
"But Angela is cool... who wouldn't like her," Jacob said.
I felt strangely comforted for a moment, hearing Angela's hopeless yearning. A sense of kinship that Angela would never know about passed through me, and I was, in that second, at one with the kind human girl.
"What does he mean by that... your yearning isn't hopeless, Edward!" Bella huffed.
It was oddly consoling to know that I wasn't the only one living out a tragic love story. Heartbreak was everywhere.
"Argh," Bella groaned. "Only if you keep thinking that way."
In the next second, I was abruptly and thoroughly irritated. Because Angela's story didn't have to be tragic. She was human and he was human and the difference that seemed so insurmountable in her head was ridiculous, truly ridiculous compared to my own situation. There was no point in her broken heart. What a wasteful sadness, when there was no valid reason for her not to be with the one she wanted.
"Yeah, wasteful," Bella muttered, thinking that Edward's was wasteful too, though he did have more of a reason to be so cautious.
Why shouldn't she have what she wanted? Why shouldn't this one story have a happy ending?
I wanted to give her a gift... Well, I would give her what she wanted. Knowing what I did of human nature, it probably wouldn't even be very difficult. I sifted through the consciousness of the boy beside her, the object of her affections, and he did not seem unwilling, he was just stymied by the same difficulty she was. Hopeless and resigned, the way she was.
"Come on, people, have faith in yourselves," Jacob said.
Bella, however, was thoughtful. She wondered if this was a mirror of how she and Edward felt... both of them not fully realizing what they other felt. She was sure that her book self couldn't have known how much he loved her... there was no possible way for her to know that. And she could see clearly that Edward didn't understand how much she lo... er... however she felt about him.
She stopped that train of thought as something else seemed to go through her. She was wondering how strongly did she feel about this guy that she had yet to meet... and she longed for that meeting to happen already. Jacob started reading then, drawing her concentration back to the book.
All I would have to do was plant the suggestion...
The plan formed easily, the script wrote itself without effort on my part. I would need Emmett's help - getting him to go along with this was the only real difficulty.
Human nature was so much easier to manipulate than vampire nature.
"You've got to watch out for this guy, Bells, he's definitely a speciesist," Jacob said.
"Whatever," Bella rolled her eyes.
I was pleased with my solution, with my gift for Angela. It was a nice diversion from my own problems. Would that mine were as easily fixed.
My mood was slightly improved as Bella and I took our seats. Maybe I should be more positive. Maybe there was some solution out there for us that was escaping me, the way Angela's obvious solution was so invisible to her. Not likely... But why waste time with hopelessness? I didn't have time to waste when it came to Bella. Each second mattered.
Mr. Banner entered pulling an ancient TV and VCR. He was skipping through a section he wasn't particularly interested in - genetic disorders - by showing a movie for the next three days. Lorenzo's Oil was not a very cheerful piece, but that didn't stop the excitement in the room. No notes, no test-able material. Three free days. The humans exulted.
"It sounds kind of boring to me," Bella mumbled and Jacob looked at her oddly.
It didn't matter to me, either way. I hadn't been planning on paying any attention to anything but Bella.
I did not pull my chair away from hers today, to give myself space to breathe.
Instead, I sat close beside her like any normal human would. Closer than we sat inside my car, close enough that the left side of my body felt submerged in the heat from her skin.
"I get it! She's hot!" Jacob said and laughed when Bella blushed and glared at him.
It was a strange experience, both enjoyable and nerve-racking, but I preferred this to sitting across the table from her. It was more than I was used to, and yet I quickly realized that it was not enough. I was not satisfied. Being this close to her only made me want to be closer still. The pull was stronger the closer I got.
I had accused her of being a magnet for danger. Right now, it felt like that was the literal truth.
Bella rolled her eyes but chuckled at this.
I was danger, and, with every inch I allowed myself nearer to her, her attraction grew in force.
And then Mr. Banner turned the lights out.
It was odd how much of a difference this made, considering that the lack of light meant little to my eyes. I could still see just as perfectly as before. Every detail of the room was clear.
"That's cool," Jacob said. "I wish I could see in the dark like that."
So why the sudden shock of electricity in the air, in this dark that was not dark to me?
"Shock of electricity?" Bella raised an eyebrow. What was he talking about and why did that make her think of the first time he touched her in the second chapter (the first time he talked to her in the books)?