“I believe something about this damaged world—the planet, not the card—couldn’t take the sunlight. The gods might have salvaged things, but they’ve gone.”
“So we’re champions of various gods, right? Like you were tapped by a death deity?” A curt nod. The idea made me shiver. “And what about me? You said I was more Aphrodite than Demeter. Were you being literal?”
“The gods go by countless names. What they’re called is unimportant. All that matters is what powers they gifted to you.”
“Your Touch-of-Death gift doesn’t seem very fair. Is it only in your hands, or is all of your skin deadly?”
Skewering me with his gaze, he enunciated the words: “Every last inch of me.”
I couldn’t tell if his words held innuendo—or a threat. Moving on. “What’s your call? How come I never hear it?”
“Perhaps I’m beyond one,” he said, evading.
“Have you heard each of the Arcana calls?” As king of the airwaves. “Even the distant ones?” The ones I could hear only wanted to whisper about the Empress’s impending gruesome death.
“I have. But for the one who awaits activation.”
I cast my mind back. Wasn’t there a card who remained dormant until he or she killed an Arcana?
“You are inquisitive this time around. You’ve asked me more questions in days than in your other lives combined.”
Added to all my other faults, I’d been a conversation hog?
“You puzzle me,” Death admitted. “You seem altered from how you’ve been in the past—at least on the surface. I want to know why.”
“I can’t say why I’m different. I don’t remember much about any past lives.”
“Based on your history, I must assume that this is all an act.”
“It’s not. Look, I’ve gotten the impression that I wasn’t exactly Miss Congeniality in past games. But in this one, I’m pretty transparent.”
“Then you’ll answer any of my questions with honesty.”
I had a feeling he was about to test me, like he’d only ask questions he already knew the answers to. “Shoot.”
“Are you and the Fool engaged in a plot against me?”
Busted. “Often.”
“Would you kill me right now if you had the opportunity?”
How to answer that? “Not if you joined my truce.”
“Alas, I know the futility. Do you think Arcana have never tried this in the past? Leave a few cards alive, with a pact of peace among them. It works for a time. Yet then the temptation of immortal life grows too strong. The killing begins again. Fate will figure out a way to make you fight.”
I hadn’t believed I was the first Arcana to have these ideas. But to know a truce had been attempted—and failed—was demoralizing. If Death told the truth about this.
“The strongest of the Arcana couldn’t make it work,” he continued. “Interestingly, you entered into a pact before. And you were the first to fold.”
“How? What’d I do?”
Another glance at my glass.
When I drank my shot, he emptied his own, refilling us. Again? I was starting to get buzzed.
“If you want to know, creature, then remember.”
“And what if I can’t?”
“Then you’ll never know. Haven’t you heard? I keep secrets like a grave.”
Again, was this teasing from him? “In any case, that was before; this is now. I’m not the same person this time around. I can’t even comprehend how I was so evil.” The record holder.
“Your family line has always taken the game very seriously, training you to be a vicious killer.”
My lips parted as I recalled my grandmother’s words: Evie, there’s a viciousness in you that I must nurture. I remembered her eyes had twinkled with affection as she’d told me, You’re going to kill them all.
I’d been eight at the time.
If my mother hadn’t sent her away, what would I be like now? What would Gran have taught me, given eight more years of my childhood? I swallowed. What would she teach me now?
Probably not how to end the game. And truces hadn’t worked in the past anyway.
I’d been stubbornly holding on to the belief that my grandmother could help me. Considering all I’d learned—and remembered—that idea seemed almost laughable. Maybe I’d held on so tightly because the alternative was murdering kids I cared about. . . .
For the first time, my urge to reach her grew a little less pressing.
“What are you thinking with such solemnity?” Death asked.
“That it’s no wonder I’m different.” I ran my finger along the rim of my glass. “I missed my lessons. Instead of learning how to murder, I was just a regular girl.” I glanced up, saw that his gaze followed the movement of my finger.
He nodded at my icons. “You’ve done quite well for yourself.”
I dropped my hand. “After my grandmother went away”—was committed to an asylum—“I wasn’t taught anything more. I went to school in a small town, I hung out with friends. I was boring, with banal and tedious musings.”
“That really vexed you, didn’t it?”
I shrugged. “Why did you want to see my thoughts anyway?”
“It’s wise to know my enemy.”
“I wish you could read my thoughts now. You’d know that I don’t want to be your enemy.”
He steepled his fingers, as arrogant as ever. His touch might be fatal, but his hands were refined. Like I imagined a surgeon’s would be. “How coincidental. When I could read your mind, you were vowing to kill me, actively forming alliances to do so. Now that I can’t, you say you wish for peace between us?”
“If I managed to get Matthew to restore our link, would you remove this cuff?”
“Not until I remove you from the game.” His tone was matter-of-fact, all reigning victor.
Which reminded me that I wasn’t here to make friends. “What was the deal you made with Matthew anyway? The one that forced him to give you access to my head?”
“All you need to know is that he’s broken it. By doing so, he’s lost honor. It will hurt him in future games.”
Just as my past broken promises had hurt me in this game. “But you broke a deal with me. I went with you in the mine, but you let Ogen continue battering the mountain.”
“My deal was that your friends wouldn’t be killed. They live yet. Empress, I haven’t lied to you.”
“What does that mean? Who has lied to me?”
Another stony stare.
Deciding he was just winding me up, I changed the subject. “What’s immortal life like?”
“Long.”
“Okay.” Awkward silence. Casting about for something to say, I asked, “Are the paintings in the hall Italian Renaissance?”
He appeared surprised. “They are. You know art?”
“I used to paint before the Flash.” Before such pastimes had become impossible. Things I’d enjoyed like dance, art, and reading had faded to distant memories when I was desperately sourcing for food and shelter each and every day. “I was fascinated by the Italian painters.”
When I’d taken an art history elective in school, I’d read and reread their chapter in my textbook, imagining the excitement of the era, the revelry and passion. My favorite painting had been del Cossa’s Triumph of Venus, but I doubted Death would appreciate that.
“It was a time of great advancement,” he said, as if with pride.
I gasped. “You were there, weren’t you?” When he inclined his head, I asked, “Were you in Florence? Or maybe Venice?” I sighed to remember how beautiful those cities had looked.
He gazed away. “I preferred more rural locales.”
Realization. He would have avoided densely populated areas, fearing he might touch others. He never would have enjoyed revelry or passion, because he wouldn’t have had friends or lovers. He must always have been on guard. “Sometimes I forget that you can’t touch others. Well, anyone but me.”
His upper arm strained, like he was clenching his fist beneath the desk. “I never forget.”
Whenever Jack was angry or frustrated, a muscle would tick in his jaw. Was a clenched fist Death’s tell? “So you lived out in the country, away from all the excitement?”
“I had everything I needed.”
I imagined him secluded in some echoing villa, all by himself, reading his books. “Any friends?”
“Mortals die so readily. I make an effort not to grow attached to anyone. Just as I never keep pets.”
“Except for your horse. How’d you find one with red eyes? Is he immortal too?”
Death shook his head. “Any steed I claim as my own grows red-eyed.”
“And you named him Thanatos? It’s catchy. Really.”
“It’s the name of a death deity. Do avail yourself of the library. Improve your mind.”
I ground my teeth. Though I wanted to point out how useless studying would be if he planned to kill me soon, I said, “Great idea.” I rose, crossing to his bookshelves. “I’ll start with your favorite book.” Then I’d have to return it to him here.
“I meant from the other library.”
Over my shoulder, I said, “I want to read what you like.”
“You have an entire collection at your disposal, but you desire a title from my personal one? Do you comprehend how valuable these books are? How much care I’ve taken over centuries to keep them pristine?”
I faced him. “Because they’re first editions.”
“Because they’re mine. I’ve spent fortunes to keep them safe in all my different homes, in all my wanderings. Through wars and catastrophes, I protected them.”
I frowned. “They sound like your children.”
He raised his glass. “The closest I’ll ever come to having them.” He said this in an unemotional tone, but the comment still struck me as sad.
After all this time, he hadn’t—and could never—start a family. He had no one. I remembered how alone I’d felt those two days I’d spent by myself on the way to Requiem. Two days.
Death might have felt that way for seven hundred thousand days.
The idea that someone like him might be lonely made me think of him as, I don’t know, more human. As if he were a normal guy in his early twenties, maybe a former college student just trying to get by.
When he was anything but. He was the Endless Knight, an immortal killer. He probably preferred being alone, lacking the need for companionship that I had.
“You won’t cough up a single book?” I said. “Are you scared I’ll get clues about your personality from reading the same things you do?”
With a put-out demeanor, he rose, joining me, but not too close. Reaching high, he took down a slim tome and handed it to me.
The Prince?
“It’s in English. Almost as old as the original Italian.” With a touch more enthusiasm, he said, “You don’t lose as much in the translation as you’d think.”
“What’s it about? Is it an adventure? Maybe a love story?”
“It’s a political treatise, or possibly a satire. . . .” He trailed off, seeming to remember who he was talking to. His expression grew shuttered again, and he returned to his chair. I got the sense that he felt more comfortable with that desk between us.
Because of what I might do to him—or because of what he might do to me?
“You speak and read Italian?”
“I speak and read many languages. A benefit of being immortal. I have much time for study.” He waved a hand, indicating those scrolls. “And I wish to continue with my research. Now.”
Leaving me to return to my solitary turret. Just the thought of that made my three shots of vodka churn in my gut. At least being with Death was interesting. “I could start this book here, while you research. We could read together.”
Was he wavering?
“I’ll be quiet as a mouse.”
He narrowed his eyes. “You think I can’t see what you’re doing? What your plan is? Leave me, creature. Do not come back here.”
With a touch of cockiness, I said, “But I have to return this book once I’m done.” I wagged it in front of him. “It’s only etiquette.”
In a tone ringing with finality, he said, “Consider it an early parting gift.”
31
DAY 279 A.F.
—Hunts and campaigns.—
I woke, rubbing my eyes. Matthew, is that you? I scowled to find Cyclops beside me again. He licked his massive chops, then dozed once more. What time is it?
—Dunno. Always dark.—
Yesterday the sun had risen for only an hour or so. Endless night in the lair of the Endless Knight? I tried to block that out of my mind. I’d wanted to foil the game, which wouldn’t matter if the entire planet failed. Where have you been? You haven’t checked in for five days.
—Busy.—
Tell me Jack’s doing better. We’d now been separated for three weeks, and I’d grown more and more frightened for him. I couldn’t concentrate, couldn’t think beyond escaping to reach him.
Or finishing my job here.
I wished I had some kind of update for Matthew, but my life seemed to be stuck on pause, Groundhog Days repeating themselves. I’d gotten no closer to the arrogant Reaper. My only development was that I’d grown accustomed to the cilice. This wasn’t a good thing; I’d planned to rid myself of it before I ever got used to it.
—Better? Jack’s doing different. We go on hunts and campaigns!— Matthew sounded like a sixteen-year-old who’d just scored his first car.
What does that mean?
He showed me a vision of Jack. Instead of the frenzy he’d demonstrated before, Jack was coldly cleaning a rifle, focused with a deadly intent. Still not drinking.