"Or 'Maddy?' " Poppy asked, intrigued despite herself.
"Huh? It's short for Madder."
Poppy wasn't sure what madder was. A plant, she thought.
"Of cours e I'm not saying anything against James," Ash said, and it was perfectly dear from his voice that he was saying something against James. "Things are diff erent for you guys in California.
You have to mix more with humans; you have to be more caref ul. So if naming yourself after vermin makes it easier ... "
He shrugged.
"Oh, yeah, they're vermin all right," Poppy said at random. She was thinking, he's playing with me. Isn't he playing with me?
She had the sinking feeling that he knew everything. Agitation made her need to move. She headed for James's stereo center.
"So you like any vermin music?" she said. "Techno? Acid jazz? Trip-hop? Jungle?" She waved a vinyl record at him. "This is some serious jump-up jungle." He blinked. "Oh, and this is great industrial noise. And this is a real good acid house stomper with a so rt of m adcore edge to it...."
She had him on the defensive now. Nobody could stop Poppy when she got going like this. She widened her eyes at him and blathered on, looking as fey as she knew how.
"And I say freestyle's coming back. Completely underground, so far, but on the rise. Now, Euro-dance, on the other han d ..."
Ash was sitting on the square couch, long legs stretched out in front of him. His eyes were deep blue and slightly glazed.
"Sweeth eart, " he said finally, "I hate to interrupt. But you and I need to talk."
Poppy was too clever to ask him what about. "... these sort of eternal void keys and troll groaning sounds that make you want to ask, 'Is anybody out there?' " she finished and then she had to breathe. Ash jumped in.
"We really have to talk," he said. "Before James gets back."
There was no way to evade him now. Poppy's mouth was dry.
He leaned forward, h is eyes a dear blue-green like tropical waters. And, yes, they really do change color, Poppy thought.
"It's not your fault," he said.
"What?"
It's not your fault. That you can't shield your mind. You'll learn how to do it, he said, and Poppy only realized halfway through that he wasn't saying it out loud.
Oh . . . spit. She should have thought of that. Should have been concentrating on veiling her thoughts. She tried to do it now.
"Listen, don't bother. I know that you're not lamia. You're made, and you're illegal. James has been a bad boy."
Since there was no point in denying it, Poppy lifted her chin and narrowed her eyes at him. "So you know. So what are you going to do about it?"
"That depends."
"On what?"
He smiled. "On you."
CHAPTER 14
YOU see, I like James," Ash said. "I think he's a little soft on vermin, but I don't want to see him in trouble. I certainly don't want to see him dead."
Poppy felt the way she had last night when her body was starving for air. She was frozen, too still to breathe.
"I mean , do y ou want him dead?" Ash asked, as if it were the most reasonable question in the world. Poppy shook her head.
"Well, then," Ash said.
Poppy got a breath at last. "What are you saying?" Then, without waiting for him to answer, she said, "You're saying that they're going to kill him if they find out about me. But they don't have to find out about me. Unless you tell them."
Ash glanced at his fingernails thoughtfully.. He made a face to show that this was as painful for him as it was for her.
" Let's go o ver the facts," he said. "You are, in fact, a former human."
"Oh, yeah, I was a vermin, all right."
He gave her a droll look. "Don't take that so seriously. It's what you are now that counts. But James did, in fact, change you without clearing it with anybody. Right? And he did, in fact, break cover and tell you about the Night World before you were changed. Right?"
"How do you know? Maybe he just changed me without telling me a thing."
He shook a finger. "Ah, but James wouldn't do that. He's got these radical permissive ideas about humans having free wi ll."
"If you know all about it, why ask me?" Po ppy said tensely.
"And if you've got a point-"
"The point is that he's committed at least two capital offenses.
Three, I bet." He flashed the wild, handsome smile again. "He must have been in love with you to have done the rest."
Something swelled in Poppy like a bird trapped in her rib cage and trying to get out. She blurted, "I don't see how you people can make laws about not falling in love! It's i nsane."
"But don't you see why? You're the perfect example. Because of love, James told you and then he changed you. If he'd had the sense to squash his feelings for you in the beginning, th e whole th ing would have been nipped in the bud."
"B ut what if you can' t squa sh it? You can't force people to stop feeling."
"Of course not, " Ash sa id, and Poppy stopped dead. She stared at him.
His lips curved and he beckoned to her. "I'll tell you a secret.
The Elders know they can't really legislate how you feel. What they can do is terrorize you so that you don't dare show your feelings-ideally, so you can' t even admit them to yourself."
Poppy settled back. She'd seldom felt so at a loss. Talking to Ash made her head whirl, made her feel as if she were too young and stupid to. be sure of anything.
She made a forlorn and helpless gesture. "But what do I do now? I can't change the past...."