You alright, little brother? Wil iam asked, composed unlike I was about to be if Patricks expression didnt diffuse soon. Id never seen an expression so shocked.
Okay, back things up for me, he said, bracing his hands over the table. Ive been a little out of sorts as of late, but I seem to remember the two of you being United last night? he asked, like he almost didnt believe it.
Wil iam shrugged like it was the most everyday kind of thing. Yeah. Whats your point?
A snicker escaped from the kitchen, sounding like Josephs little girl one, which was promptly silenced by a flick of a wet dish towel delivered via Nathanial. Patrick didnt notice, though. He wouldnt have noticed a 747 coming in for a landing at the moment.
O-kaaaaaaaay, he said, squinting between the two of us. And you spent the night together?
We nodded together.
The entire night together, Patrick clarified.
Yes, Wil iam said, his voice and expression stil composed. Whats your point?
Patricks shock lined into disbelief as he waved his hands at us. Did you forget something?
This time it was an entire circus of snickers that erupted from the kitchen, but he remained oblivious.
We were a little tired last night given wed been on the front lines of the biggest coup detat in the worlds history, but now that you mention it . . .
Wil iam said, clasping his hands over my shoulders and steering me towards the tiny guest bathroom in the hal way.
You and your brothers pranks know no bounds, do they? I whispered as I caught up to what Wil iam had in mind.
Took you this long to figure it out? he breathed in my ear, pinching at my sides.
Breakfast is ready! Abigail hol ered at us.
Dont worry, Wil iam assured, waving his hand back at her. This wil only take a couple minutes.
This time it was my turn to snicker.
Just go with me on this. Patricks going to burst a vein in his forehead.
I dont know which is worse. Fooling your sensitive brother into believing we did nothing but sleep last night or pretending were about to do what he thinks we are in this coat closet of a bathroom, I whispered as I sidled up against the wal , making room for Wil iam.
Whos pretending? he whispered, gripping the back of my thigh and pul ing it up over his waist. I didnt wait for him to grab the other one.
Only a couple minutes? I whispered, my breathing already shal ow, rethinking my affections for the bathroom. It was real y quite cozy . . . and intimate . . . and steamy.
He chuckled as I ran my mouth down his neck, already tugging at his shirt. As much as Id prefer to be doing exactly what youve got in mind, after months of rushing, the only thing I dont want to do with you is hurry.
The man had more restraint that me, not that that was saying much. I had none, so even someone who had the smal est fraction of it had infinitely more than me. Fine, I relented, removing my lips and loosening the grip my legs had around him. What have you got in mind?
He grinned, unwinding his arms from me and extending them wide, but I stayed glued where I was. Bang the wal s with al your might for a minute and then wel leave the room disheveled and smiling.
Prime. Evil, I said, already forming my fists into bal s.
It runs in the family, he said, before slamming his back into the wal behind him, fol owed by my fists slamming it right after. I had to remind myself not to use ful strength because the wal s would be no more if I did.
We moved to the next and the next, until we were smashing Wil iams back and my fists into each wal in a haphazard pattern that was likely shaking the entire first floor. I could only imagine Patricks face.
The poor guy, but I soothed my reservations about taking part in Wil iam and Josephs ruse by vowing to bake him cookies every day for a year.
The worst kind of transgression could be forgiven with that kind of a peace offering, at least in Patricks eyes.
That should do the trick, Wil iam whispered after slamming his shoulder into one final wal . He slid me down from my position to which I frowned to the point of lower lip pouting. I love that Im capable of deriving that kind of reaction from you, he said, sweeping a thumb over my frown. Its making me a tad cocky I think.
You have every right to be, I said, trying to shake the images from last night away. At least for now.
I do, dont I? he said, as he ruffled his hair al around until it resembled what Elviss hair might have looked like fol owing a night on tour, pre-white sequined bodysuit.
Be kind, I said as he moved onto my hair, fingering it into a ratty mess of a cyclone. Just how every girl wanted to look on the first day of her honeymoon.
That ought to do it, he said to himself, undoing the first couple buttons on his Levis and twisting my sweatshirt around so it was backwards. He popped the contacts from his eyes and did the same with mine, tucking them back into the plastic container. You are truly the most beautiful, virtuous creature to ever leave a bathroom with a man after a minutes time.
Not sure if that was intended as a compliment, but thanks. I guess, I said, elbowing him as he twisted the door open.
I felt the col ective inhale of air and took my own, repeating reminders not to break into hysterics when I saw and heard Patricks response.
Patrick hadnt moved from his location, his head the only thing moving when we rounded the corner straight-faced and heading right for our seats at the table, like nothing had happened.
His eyes amplified as he investigated ours and the sapphire color that hadnt been there moments ago. What the? he said, staring at us like we were the only riddle he couldnt solve.
Hows breakfast? Wil iam asked, looking at Patricks heaping plate with feigned interest.
Hows breakfast? Patrick repeated. How. Is. Breakfast? He shook his head, grabbing Wil iams arm as he was passing by. Who are you and what have you done with my brother?
What are you talking about? Wil iam asked, plucking a piece of pineapple from a skewer and popping it in his mouth.
You would have sold your soul to the highest bidder to final y get to be with Bryn the way you were final y al owed to last night and you expect me to believe that you merely overlooked it? Patrick asked, taking a biscuit from the basket and pitching it at the back of Wil iams head as he headed towards an increasingly red-faced Joseph.
What? Wil iams laughed, letting the biscuit hit its target. We were tired. Defeating evil wil do that to you.
Patrick threw a disgusted look at the back of Wil iams head before looking at me. Bryn, please. What the flippity-flap is going on here? Either Im having an out-of-body experience or my brother has been possessed. Which one is it?
So I might have had a bigger weak spot for Patrick than Id let myself acknowledge before seeing him this at a loss, like every truth hed held of life was being questioned. I had to put him out of his misery. Or at least al eviate it.
Wil iam was just handing off the plastic contact container to Joseph when I let my temporary lapse in Patrick weakness hit its peak. I made sure Patrick caught my hint to fol ow my gaze as I pointed at Wil iam and Josephs stealthy exchange. Patrick might not have been one for details, but he was a master at picking up the slightest of hints.
He threw me a smile and a wink before marching right up to his dark haired brothers. I give you points for delivery, but no marks for execution, he shouted, surprising them both as he fished the container out of Josephs death grip. I dont know whether to be insulted youd expect me to fal for something so ridiculous or to be flattered for thinking of me at al on your first morning as a United couple.
Wil iam and Joseph were the first to burst into laughter, but it was fol owed by the addition of a couple more. Sorry, Patrick, Wil iam said in between his laughter. You know I love you and you also know I couldnt let an opportunity like this pass me by.
Yeah, yeah, I get it, Patrick said, tossing the contacts back at Joseph and shooting him a glare. Not only do I get to be the third wheel, but I also get to be the butt of every joke. What an eternity I have to look forward to, he mumbled, pouting his way back to the table.
His family had experienced Patricks proclivity for pouting for generations. I hadnt and he was a good actor. Plus, I had the added guilt of crushing his heart, so that could have been the reason I found myself going to him and wrapping my arms around him.
Have I had a chance to say thank you for conquering the axis of evil and saving me from insanity trapped in that black hole yet? I asked, squeezing him into a bear hug.
Not yet, but I forgive you, he said, pul ing me to him Youve been kind of busy avoiding death, getting United, playing me for a fool, that kind of stuff.
Im sorry, I offered, smiling. And thank you.
Anytime, kiddo. Anytime. He tucked his chin over my head and pul ed me closer, grinning like the Cheshire cat at Wil iam.
Because youre my little brother, youre al owed to hug my wife for a few seconds. But because Im aware of your feelings for her and youre approaching a ten second embrace there, Wil iam said, shooting him a look, Il give you two more seconds to drop your arms from my girl before I rip them from their sockets.
I see the territorial aggression hasnt tapered off since being United, Patrick mumbled as he broke free of our hug, raising his hands and taking deliberate steps away from me.
Come here, Wil iam said, approaching us. You can hug her anytime you want, as long as its alright with Bryn. Were family, he said, his eyes soft as he sandwiched the three of us together into a hug that made mine seem as firm as a wet noodle.
Sure, of course were family, Patrick mumbled in between us. Since youre the one that ended up with the girl.
I elbowed him as we unwound from our sandwich. He always had the girl. It wasnt like there was a competition for me.
Ouch, Patrick said, taking a seat in front of his mountain of food. Im not even competition any more to someone as boring and hard to look at as Wil iam. This day just keeps getting better.
Enough, already, Abigail scolded, setting down a tray of French toast sprinkled with powered sugar and another with cream cheese rol ed crepes. When it came to a meal, Abigail never did anything half-way.
Yeah, enough already . . . Bartholomew, I teased, taking a seat across from him and smirking. Can I cal you Bart? I asked, going in for a muffin.
Patrick smiled humorlessly. Not if you expect me to answer, Bryny-Bear.
Do your worst, I said, unaffected. No matter what clever nickname you come up with for me, nothing could ever overtake Bartholomew.
Yeah, thank goodness Mother and Father saved that gem for you, Wil iam said, sliding into the chair next to me and shifting a whipped cream and strawberry waffle from his overflowing plate to mine. Your favorite, Mrs. Hayward, he said proudly as he kissed my temple.
Patrick made a motion of cutting his index finger across his neck before narrowing in on Wil iams breakfast. Since when did your appetite pick up to rival mine? For once, Patrick wasnt exaggerating. Wil iams plate peaked up into a mountain a good half-foot high, besting Patricks mastery of food stacking.
Since, unlike you, I was doing something other than sleeping and I plan on repeating that exact same thing for at least a year straight before sleep gets put back on the schedule, he explained, cutting into his eggs benedict, I need my proverbial energy.
Patrick grinned at his wistful-faced brother, a genuine one, as he leaned in. So was it as good as you always imagined it would be?
I flushed, more from the memories than the embarrassment.
Nah, Wil iam said, finishing his bite as a smile curled up one side of his mouth. It was like a mil ion times better.