Sean laughs and takes my hands. “Order anything you like, Mel. I mean it. Come on, Avery. Our table awaits.”
Before we walk out of the room, Mel asks, “What about Black?”
Sean looks back at her, and then narrows his gaze in my direction. “There’s a more pressing question to be asked first, especially since it will demand a different response to your question of employment.”
CHAPTER 9
Every inch of my body is giddy with excitement. It’s to the point that I’m shaking and I can’t shut up. Ever since we stepped out of the room, I can’t stop smiling or talking. I take Sean’s hand and lean against his shoulder in the elevator. “Ask me,” I whisper, but there are other people in the small space. I know he won’t, but it’s fun to tease him.
Sean looks down at me from the corner of his eyes. He’s got that stern formal thing going on and I wish he’d slouch just a little bit. He can’t be nervous, can he? Surely Sean knows what I’m going to say. “You’re awfully quiet, Mr. Ferro.”
The couple standing across from us looks displeased. The woman’s face visibly contorts and her polished appearance isn’t enough to distract from her disgust. Sean sees it and tightens his jaw, but he says nothing.
The man standing with her looks unimpressed, and scoots closer to the woman, like Sean might go all cray cray on their pampered asses, and kill everyone before the elevator reaches the ground floor. I hate it. I hate the way they look at Sean, like he’s soulless. Sean Ferro is not a monster.
I don’t know what comes over me, but I can’t bite my tongue. I blurt it out. “Don’t look at him like that.”
The woman sneers at me. “Just because he’s wealthy doesn’t mean he should get away with murder. It was a massive injustice to Amanda Ferro and her family, and you are a fool to be standing so close to him.”
Sean doesn’t respond, he just stands there with his hands clasped in front of him, waiting for the doors to open. I don’t understand why he doesn’t fight back. They’re rude, and wrong.
Screw it. I step toward the woman and look her in the eye. “You don’t know a thing about Amanda or Sean Ferro, and you’re an idiot if you think everything you see on TV is true.”
Her jaw drops open and the man standing next to her pulls her closer, increasing the distance between us. His jaw opens like he’s going to say something, but the DING cuts him off and the doors open.
I take Sean’s hand and give them a lethal look as we walk out. “Stupidity is for the weak-minded, and you better not sit by us.”
Sean pulls me away and tucks my hand under his arm. He takes a deep breath. “Avery, you can’t yell at every person who hates me. First of all, the list is endless, and second, you can’t convince them of something they don’t want to hear.” Sean’s blue gaze rests on the side of my face and there’s something there, like he’s accepted this horrible public persona.
“Yeah, well…They’re stupid.” I’m a genius! That’s the problem, everyone else is dumb. People see what they want to see and nothing more. Everyone knows that the media is biased. They all hated that Sean didn’t cry, that he seemed inhuman during the trial. He’s more human than they realize, breakable like everyone else, but who wants to report on that? The idea that Sean Ferro is a monster sells better.
Sean’s voice is warm and kind. “They prefer to think of me as a villain. I’ve learned to live with it, the question is, can you?” He smiles softly and takes my hand as we reach the restaurant doors.
A smirk appears on my lips. I don’t want to drop this injustice, but Sean brings up the question again. I poke his chest, right over his heart. “That better not be what you were going to ask me.”
Sean’s eyes glitter, like he’s trying not to laugh. I love it when he’s like this. If I could figure out which mixture of annoying and innocent (or naïve) was conjuring that smile, I’d use it all the time.
“This way, Mr. Ferro.” The man behind the desk grabs two menus and walks us to the back of the room, past staring eyes, and to a perfect little table—the table where we had our first meal together. Awh.
I glance up at him as I sit in my chair. “Did you pick this table on purpose, Mr. Ferro?”
“I do everything on purpose.” Sean settles back into his chair and rests his hands on the arms like it’s a throne.
I mirror his posture. “Me too.” Sean laughs abruptly. I love that sound and the way he leans forward like it’s a horrible thing to witness. “Honestly, Mr. Ferro, I have no idea what you’re laughing about.” My voice is light, and teasing. “I’m a very intentional person, it’s just that my best intentions usually go awry.”
He laughs louder and actually twists in his seat. “Avery, you are a spectacular woman, but I cannot possibly imagine a world where you deliberately let your car be stolen, and then flashed traffic to jump on the back of a stranger’s bike.”
Grinning at him, I lift my water glass and take a sip before saying smugly, “I planned the whole thing. You fell into my elaborate trap.” I offer a soft, diabolical laugh and smirk at him.
Sean leans forward and takes my hands. “Do you ever wonder if you fell into mine?”
I make a face. “That wasn’t the right question, either. Ask me, Mr. Ferro.”
Sean is cradling my hands in his and staring into my eyes. My pulse races faster when he looks at me like that. He has this hypnotic stare that’s unnerving, and sexy as hell. Sean’s eyes dip to the table and then back to my face. My heart pounds harder and I can’t stop smiling. Part of me wants to squee up and down the hallway, but I need to act sane for a moment.
Sean’s lips part and I’m ready. My answer is ready. I’m so excited!
His eyes dip to the table. “Avery, I can’t ask you now.”
CHAPTER 10
I blink. “Rich boy say what?”
He pats my hands and tips his head to the side. “Stop talking like a cartoon character, and listen. I wanted things to be a certain way, at a specific time. You’ll have to wait.” He pulls his hands away and leans back in his chair.
My bottom lip curls out and I’m pouting without meaning to. “I hate waiting.”
Sean just grins in response. He doesn’t produce the ring or mention marriage. There’s no talk like before, at the beach, no nothing. He’s stern and cold again. I don’t hide my disappointment. I can’t. It feels like I’ve been sucker punched one too many times and I can no longer pretend not to care. Sean ordered before we ever sat down. It would have irritated me if he didn’t get the most delicious food I’d ever put in my mouth. Sean is presumptive and it pisses me off, because this thing with the ring and the food, it’s to show how well he knows me and how well he can control me. Yeah, I want things like that sometimes, but not now.
After dinner, I’m leaning pretty far to my right, with my elbow on the table and my hand holding up my head. Think surly teenager. It’s not pretty but after this morning, I expected more from him. Sean has issues. Every time I feel like we’re on the same page, he does something like this. I’d cry if I weren’t so pissed off.
The waiter brings out our desserts and refills my champagne glass. For a moment, I wonder if he’s going to propose during dessert like a normal guy, but Sean would never hide the ring in something. He’s too straightforward for that. Since there’s no jewelry in sight, I’m doubting that there’s going to be a proposal tonight.
I poke at my dessert, but don’t really eat it. Sean notices. “Are you finished?” He’s been watching me from the other side of the table, quieter than usual. Or maybe I’m just steaming too much to be a good date.
“Yes,” I say, pushing away the plate. The truth is I’m a little crushed and feeling the post-Christmas crash, but I didn’t get any presents. It sucks monkeys. I can’t even pretend anymore. I glance around the room and wonder if anyone else is having a crappy night. The other couples look happy, like they’re celebrating something special. This place cost a small fortune, so it’s a treat to eat here. A bunch of the patrons probably blew a week’s pay on this dinner. Except for my man, Sean. He’s got lots of money and even more emotional PMS. God, he’s worse than I am. Maybe.
“Good, because I have a question for you.” I straighten in my seat a little bit and try not to let my balloon of hope inflate again. Seriously, that thing has been bent every which way and resembles a deflated knot right about now. Sean puts his fork down and folds his hands together. “Are you attending your graduation ceremony?”
My face scrunches up. “What?” Weird question.
“They asked me to give a lecture to the graduating class—to be the guest speaker—and I told them that I’d have to ask you.”
I lean on my elbow again and pick at the table cloth. “I wasn’t planning on it.”
“Why not?”
“There’s no one to hood me. You know, before you walk across the stage, someone puts the sashie thing over your head and rests it on your shoulders. My mom would have done it. Since she’s not here, I figured…” I look up into his face and see the fragility. Looking back down at the table, I say, “I don’t understand. Why do you want to hood me? You know you don’t actually get to tie me up, right?”
He nods, but doesn’t smile. Actually, it looks like I kicked him. “I know.”
“Then why?” I watch Sean as he taps his finger on the table and avoids my gaze.
“Because you sacrificed everything for that moment. If this isn’t fleeting, if I matter to you—”
Straightening in my seat, I finally say what I’m thinking. “Sean, why won’t you ask me?” He looks away and doesn’t answer. This isn’t a game anymore. I think he had every intention of asking me when we were upstairs, but something changed. There’s no pressing need to ask me anything. Sean’s sitting there like he always does. I try to stay calm and ask the question even though I already know the answer. “Did you change your mind?”
His blue gaze flicks up and meets mine. “No.”
Liar. “Just tell me the truth. Don’t hide behind that placid expression and let yourself feel for a second.”
“Let myself feel? Do you seriously think that’s the problem?”
“Not in its entirety, but I think a general lack of empathy is part of the problem.” That was a cheap shot, but it infuriates me when he acts so stoic. He can act that way with everyone else, but not with me.
Sean mashes his mouth shut and looks back and forth before leaning forward and blasting me. “Do you know what they’re going to say about you if you become Mrs. Sean Ferro? Do you seriously think that I haven’t thought about it? About how you’d take it when those insults are hurled at you? Avery, I’ve heard so many hateful things, day after day. I wish I could tell you that I don’t care, that they roll off like rain, but they don’t. You haven’t had to endure that kind of punishment and you’ve done nothing to warrant it, but marrying me will be enough. People will talk, they’ll be unkind toward you, and it will be my fault. If you carry my name, you carry my burdens.” He pats his napkin to his lips and looks like he just opened a checking account. There’s no emotion in those blue eyes, they’re vacant of grief and pain.